MY POOR HUSBAND WAS SEIZED BY THE PERJOR TAJIR

CHAPTER 35

My days after I lived in a new house, I kept myself busy going to the cake shop and gathering with some of my friends. The children I often leave at the house of Father and Mother with Bude Ris.

My shop I've moved to somewhere else, but it's still downtown. So that I don't always remember Ririn's shadow. A shadow that makes the heart unsettled.

I want to forget all the pain in my heart. With my activities, I can momentarily forget about my current life issues. If I stay at home, I always think about Mas Randi.

Sandy has been busy lately. Every day we leave in the morning and go home at night. Mas Randi said he again controls two shops, Ririn's shop and mine first. Mas Randi also looks after Ririn's son who is still hospitalized.

I don't want to think about it anymore. I'm learning to get used to it without Mas Randi. I only met Mas Randi at night. I feel like lately Mas Randi changed, a little indifferent towards me. Sandy is also rarely at home. Not like I used to be so attentive to me. I don't know!

My friends invited me to study Islam twice a week with an Ustadzah. I've permission to Mas Randi. Grateful, Mas Randi allowed. I am now following the study.

Three weeks later, I completely changed my appearance. Which I usually wear trousers, tunics, a slim robe and a rectangular hijab. Now, I wear a loose robe plain and khimar with a length under the thighs. Thankful, my friends bring a positive side to my life right now. I learned to migrate.

I studied religion more and more with an Ustadzah. The heart feels very cool when following the study. I am very comfortable in this place. Like meeting an oasis in the middle of a desert, no longer a mirage.

I learned to love God. It turns out that love for humans is not eternal love, because humans can hurt. You cannot love humans too much.

I feel slapped. Yes, all this time I loved Mas Randi so much. Until I always wanted to have Mas Randi completely. Mas Randi belongs to Allah.

I learned to love God. Love that is everlasting and never hurts is only love for God, the creator of the universe.

Mas Randi often praised my current appearance.

"Adek, now more beautiful and sholehah. Dear wife, Mas." said Mas Randi every time I would go to study.

*****

"Dec, baby Ririn's home. Thankfully, his condition was normal despite having a heart defect. Mas, forgot his medical name. Anyway his heart is weak, Dek." said Mas Randi one night when we were lying down to sleep.

"Oh.. Thank God, Mas. May you always have health, my. Hopefully soon normal like any other baby. Mas, have you filed for divorce with Ririn or not?" I was curious because all this time I saw Mas Randi look like a herd.

"Said Mas, if Ririn and the baby are stable Mas will take care of the divorce. Now everything is stable." I continued.

Mas Randi looked silent. I don't know what to think. I can't guess. I only collect his promise from that time until now because it has not been kept.

"Yes, if Mas doesn't divorce Ririn, it's okay, Mas" I said.

"It's okay, Mom. But I'm backing down." I said.

"Remember Mas! At that time I have given time to Mas one month, it means there is only one week left for Mas to divorce Ririn. I'm not messing with my words. If in one week Mas does not show evidence of a certificate is arranging a divorce, then exactly one more week I will come alone to the religious court, I will sue for divorce, Mas." continue again with great steadiness. I don't want to drag on in a situation like this. I need certainty.

Hearing my words Mas Randi's face immediately turned tense and looked very chaotic. Mas Randi looked up at the ceiling of our room. Randi did not answer.

"How, Mas?" ask again.

Mas Randi took a long breath.

"Mas confused, Deck. Baby Ririn, Hana, is sickly. I did not want to divorce Ririn. Hana needs a full-fledged parent. Poor Hana, Deck. Hannah is not like other babies. Hana's not normal. Hana needs special attention." said Mas Randi lirih.

"Oh.. Yaseudah then, Mas. What is clear is that I will not retract my words" I said flatly.

I turned my body behind him. Mas Randi quickly hugged me from behind.

"So, don't talk about it, honey! Remember that! Our three kids, they need a whole parent, Dek. Be patient, dear." whispered Mas Randi in my ear.

I straightened my body up. Then facing Mas Randi.

"Sorry, Mas. Now there is no more patience. Remember yes, Mama! One more week I give you time. No more back and forth. It's up to you to choose me or Ririn. What is clear is that I want to get out of this complicated household quickly. Either Mas's divorcing Ririn or I'm going to divorce Mas!" smooth talking.

I looked at Mas Randi, and it seemed that Mas Randi was shedding tears on both cheeks. Her eyes are red.

"Don't, Honey. Love it again time. I promise you that when I meet the right time, I will divorce Ririn. I don't want to lose you, Adek. Be patient, my dear. For the sake of our children." said Mas Randi with a trembling voice while grasping my hand tightly.

"What have I been impatient about all this time, Mom? Mas has been for months just promises, promises that I don't know when to keep. I'm impatient how do I try? I'm waiting for certainty from you! It's not just promises from you!" lirih. Mas Randi is sobbing, Ah! Mas Randi just cried. Anything crying.

"Already, Mas. Don't have to cry. Nothing to cry about. It's already night. Let's go to sleep!" I said as I tilted my body again behind him, then I closed my eyes while pulling the blanket. My mind is still raging. I still hear Mas Randi. Let Mas Randi think of my words. That is if he thinks about it. Whatever!

Yes, Allah. Why can't my heart hold my chest? Why is my heart still like this? Why is it so hard to leave worldly affairs behind?

Right now, I just want to get away from the problems that have shackled my heart all this time, this protracted problem. After that I will learn to love YOU, Yes, God. Forgive your labile servant, O God. Ashtaghfirullahal.