Lurah Pondokku Candidate My Husband

52. Marriage Without Love

Pov Nur's

There is nothing more painful when the love and heart of our husband is no longer ours. Yeah, I've been preparing for the worst. I don't know, whether my husband realized it or not, that his heart was double. The female Felling was sensitive, able to feel her husband's heart not with her anymore.

I saw my husband still daydreaming in the corner, I packed up and was ready to go, with my feet shuffled. I will not beg for love. I will fight for my future and that of my beloved son. I don't want to live in a marriage without love.

My husband's love has been taken away by another woman. That's what hurts me the most. I can live without money, without food, without love in-laws, without love in-laws, but I cannot live without my husband's love.

I was determined to leave my husband. When I saw him still busy daydreaming, must be thinking about the existence of the woman of his heart. My heart is angry.

I stopped the angkot that passed in front of my shop, let me go, than my existence is meaningless anymore. After I was taken in, my heart started to fret, where am I going to take myself, with a 2-month-old baby? Seeing my crying son, my heart began to be sad.

'Forgive Mama, baby! But Mamah cannot forgive Papah you who have been wishing for a heart. Mamah did not know, whether there was still the name of Mamah in her heart or not.

"Mba, where are you going?" I was surprised by the driver's voice. I was also confused where to go.

"Do you know, a cheap hostel, near here?" ask when you see our current stop. It was a little far from my husband's shop. 'Yes, I can hide around here first" I told myself.

"I have a simple place, if Mba pleases, I will take him there. Poor baby, must be thirsty and hungry!" said the kindly driver.

"Yes sir, I want to. I just need a place to avoid my husband. Help me, Sir!" I said with my eyes beginning to glaze over.

"Well, let me take you, but there are no passengers. Yes, Mba! Don't cry for someone who hurt us. Better to smile for Mba's baby!" advice of the father. Even strangers can still give peace, when my heart is upset like this. 'O Allah, bless me every step of the way!" my prayer.

"Prophe Mba, trust God! It does not always rain. There's gonna be a day when the rainbow re-colours our lives." The driver, too, was wise.

"Come, Mba! That's my house. For a while, Mba could stay here. I just happen to be living with my mother. He works at a restaurant. But sorry, yes Mba!The place is simple." I nodded, right now in my mind just want to lie down. Closing my heavy eyes, thank God for not waking up again. Really, nothing hurts more, when my heart and husband are no longer mine.

With tears in my eyes, I entered the simple house. The driver entered a room. For a long time, I sat on the sofa in the living room. Look at this house. My baby suddenly cried again. Maybe he was hungry, since the morning I had not eaten, who the hell, who had an appetite, saw a husband who was just busy thinking about other women?

"Mba, come on in, the room's ready. That's my sister's room. He now lives in the city. Work there. Go home if you just fly. Mba can take it first. If the baby is hungry, do I need to get baby milk?" ask with attention. God, why should a stranger care about us? Suddenly my heart is sad. A bloodless wound is a wound when the heart of our husband is no longer ours.

"I didn't cry because of my father. I mourn my poor fate. Hiks hyks!" the tears are getting louder.

"Mba, rise up for her son, Mba. He needs spirit, Mba! Mba must be hungry, I'll go out first, find food for us. I also happen to not have lunch. Just rest in the room, excuse me!" I got up from the sofa and walked to the room that had been prepared by the driver who had no idea what his name was.

The driver's father was so nice that we had not even met, but he had given me so much and my baby. I breastfed my son, not knowing it was there or not. I have not eaten or drunk all day. I only brought 1 million rupiah, the money my husband gave me yesterday. The plan is we will give jewelry to me, fortunately yesterday I did not buy. Ah, otherwise, I don't have any money handles at all.

For 30 minutes, the driver returned after buying two packs of food. My baby's asleep. I greet the man whom I do not know his name, but to me like a helper angel.

"Let's eat first, I'll get some water!" the man then went to the back, carrying drinking water and a spoon. And water for hand washing."Sorry, yes! Just a simple meal, let's eat!" bring him. I feel awkward, eating alone with a stranger.

"I'm sorry, Mom. My name is Nur, whose name is Mas?" ask me while reaching for the food that was offered by this good person.

"I'm Badri, Mba." she smiled at me.

"The wife of Mas Badri, where? Would his wife not be angry, if I lived here?" I was careful to be afraid to offend him.

"I don't have a wife, Mba! I am poor, ugly again! Wherever there are women who want to be with me" he said in a sad tone.

"Mas Badri is good. I'll meet a good woman later too. I'll move out of here after getting the boarding. I don't want to give any trouble to Mas Badri. It's not good for a woman to stay with a single person for a long time. Afraid of slander." I said and I finished my meal.

"Yes, Mba! I'll help you find a hostel around here, so if there's anything, my mom and I can help." He then cleaned up our food. I wanted to help but it was forbidden. That nice guy, I hope he finds his soul mate. Amians!

"Yes, Mba just rest in the room, I just called my mother. So that later he was not surprised when he came home to see Mba. I work again yes, while looking for a hostel for Mba!" mas Badri said and then came out of his house.

"This is my key from the outside, Mba! Let Mba rest in peace. Don't forget to lock the room, Mba! Excuse me first, I'm going to work again!" I just nodded and went into my room. I cried in this simple room. I don't know what my husband is doing now. I left my phone at the store, because in a hurry, I left with just my baby bag and a few pieces of my clothes. I hope I can live with what I bring.

Once I get the boarding, I'll find a job. So that my life can be independent and not bother others.