LOCKDOWN A Love And Covid - 19
Episode lost 1
The Javanese proverb says "witing tresno jalaran soko kulino" love grows out of habit. Get used to living together, get used to sleeping together, get used to telling stories. And you know what? Habits are born of compulsion . As long as it is not love, never despair. That's how I learned to love my husband.
But after we love, we will be more afraid, we are not alone with one thing in the form of loss. It is impossible for us to take something off easily if we have chosen it and given the best position in our hearts. Such is the risk of people who love each other, a little they must be afraid of one thing called loss.
The phone vibrated on the dashboard of the car I was riding in, I looked around the quiet. I picked up the phone from Firhan.
"honey, I'll be on a plane soon."
Report Firhan to me
"alhamdulillah, may the journey be smooth. It's raining here. In the rain or not?"
"hot times here. Fortunately, we entered the waiting room. Later if there is a call, yes go directly to the plane." replied Firhan
"it's raining heavily here... Just a minute.."
I put the phone away from my ear. The parking attendant was waiting for me to open the window after he tapped three times with the windshield plan of my car.
"iyya sir why..?" ask the parking attendant who wears an orange uniform covered in plastic raincoats green color bright.
"engapunten (sorry) mbak.. The car can't stop along this road."
With a careful and polite heart he said and pointed at the road sign with his right thumb and left hand that was on the side of his right hand, I followed the direction of his thumb on the left side of the road. Parking is prohibited 100 meters ahead. I smiled at him.
"oah iyya sir.. I'm moving my car forward."
I answered, I took twenty thousand out of the bag.
"for parking services a little sir, it's easy to be blessed."
He accepted and left me.
I restarted the car engine away from the road 100 meters from where I stopped. I connected my bluetooth phone to the car so I could hear my husband talking again.
" hello yank.. Hello. "I said but there is no answer.
It was sad that he had not given her a message to read the prayer and much remembrance during the journey even though I knew, she would do it without my command. Firhan first said goodbye to me through whatsaap message that he sent 4 minutes ago.
"The plane is leaving soon, I need to turn off the phone. I always remember your message, my dear.. See you at the airport later 😘."
Talk to an emoticon kiss bye.
I could only smile at my own smile in response, I responded using a voice message.
"i'm waiting for you.. I love you mas."
The rain is getting heavier, the wind scattering the raindrops make it dance in the air.
I still have to continue my journey. Just slow down don't need to be tight, I said to myself. A great shock from the underground I felt, I stepped on the brake inside, as well as other vehicles to sound the clatter of the brakes and the sound of friction tires and asphalt. Slightly shaking my hands, a possible earthquake or my inner tsunami while waiting for what happened, the rain was very heavy but some people were desperate to get out of their vehicles, some shopkeepers also came out, then they turned to the back of my car. I turned my head, but the rain was too heavy making my eyes unable to catch the object back there, all I saw was the rain that still danced to and fro in waves tossed by the wind.
I opened the car window on the left side of my steering wheel.
"busy buk.. What's up buk..?" I asked a mother who was also curious about the vibrations that occurred a few minutes ago, her batik negligee waved in the wind and some splashes of heavy rain, she approached the half-open window of my car.
"the old tree fell down." he said making me limp, I was dazed when the mother passed leaving me holding the steering wheel. Rather nervously, I opened my car window, my head looking up out of the car with great difficulty looking back, letting my light blue headscarf be a reservoir of rough rainwater. I didn't see it clearly making me impatient so I decided to go out. In the rain, under the pitch-black sky, I was almost caught in death. I saw the old tree where I parked the car had fallen in the way, the electric pole across the road was also knocked down by the weight of the old tree. If only God had not sent a parking attendant! It felt like twenty thousand dollars was too small for an old man whom God sent to save my life. I daydreamed, I could hardly tell if this was rain running down my face or tears.
"snake, it'll hurt. Come in the shop first.."
Pinta batik women who had previously reached from the car, still slow and daydreaming I just follow the invitation of his hand that holds my arm, he gave half of his umbrella to cover my body that was soaked with rainwater.
I almost faced death, God still saves me here. I can't imagine if I ignored the parking attendant and chatted with Firhan. Unceasingly my mouth shook making my teeth sleepy because of the cold, but it was not a long time I was pecking at the side of my car.
"no what are you afraid of..?" asked the mother, her hand carried a tray containing a glass of hot tea and then gave it to me. I couldn't hide my tears.
"i almost got hit by a tree just now.."
I held the glass with the hot tea for a moment.
"i almost died....If there was no father who told me to get out from under the tree. I'm..."
I was unable to continue my words, sad and grateful and overwhelmed that I was still alive, I was allowed to meet my husband later.
" iyya ibuk ngerti mbak. Thank God I have many lives. "this mother patted my shoulder gently. The term has many lives means that God still gives the opportunity to live, so the people of our region call it.
I was disappointed not to hear Firhan's voice for following the parking attendant's directions to advance my vehicle, but within five minutes I was more grateful than disappointed. And maybe I'd be more disappointed if I didn't move my vehicle.
The tea started to warm slowly, I drank it. I saw the wall clock hanging over the television in this shop showing at 09:30, it was time for me to get up from my seat. I asked for permission to change, because my clothes were soaked in rainwater.
"sir, there was a person who fell over the tree earlier, mother went away for a while ya." half yelling mother told me from the front door of the bathroom.
"yeah buk, thank you, I want to say goodbye."
I said but not heard the slightest answer, I peeked from the crack of the wooden door turned out he had passed away leaving me. My heart beats hard when I hear bad news about death. Maybe because I watched too many horror movies, as if a dead body was waiting for me in front of this shop and said I wanted to say goodbye first. I shuddered and half ran forward.
I'm sure you didn't want me to give you the money, I put a blue sheet on the table, right next to the empty glass that had hot tea.
I passed by without looking back, the rain was easing, only a soft shade still dripping on the surface of my cloth a few times. I drove around trying to forget what happened some time ago, trying to play the music Firhan kept on my little flash and following the long road through every village in Yogyakarta, the city of art, the city of culture, gudeg city and special city. That's the nickname of this city.
An hour and thirty minutes passed, I entered the Adi Sucipto airport area of Yogyakarta, the sound of a train sign alarm will pass by, soon the train will pass. I just looked up for a moment, not wanting to linger long watching the fast-moving train.
Right in front of the Baitul Hidayah mosque in the car counting complex I stopped. Firhan should have landed at 11:00 this time at Jakarta's Halim Perdana Kusuma airport, but there was no answer after he turned off his phone earlier. I try to call him through whatsaap always reads calling, not turning into ringing. When prayers arrived, I took a ride from my steering chair to stretch after an hour and a half of sitting.
I took a long step into this mosque.
"this is Yasmine's sister..?" the wet hoarse voice of the figure of the pink veiled woman watching me made me look up at her.
"writers who at that time came to UMSU, right..? Lecturer Firhan's wife..?" he continued reassuringly
"iyyaa right, who is this..?" I asked while extending my hand towards him. He sat next to me in the end.
"this is you - read me - you brother. The one before brother got in the car we talked about Firhan's lecturer." I guessed it would remember the face one year ago.
"ooh maa shaa Allah Laras ya."
"oh, my God, I remember the author" she said excitedly, holding her cubby cheek with both hands.
"what show are you here for.?"
"that's my brother, going to uncle's house. All my grandfather, it has not been to Jogja ten years."
I just realized that the girl in front of me was married at the end of her semester, seconds of thesis will be with the husband of course.
This brownish brown-skinned girl tells many stories about the household she and her husband built. Armed with a book that I write for the reader, and Laraslah one of the people who practice the contents of my book. I was so excited to hear his story and grateful to inspire so many souls.
"ah sister was already yes." he said farewell after a glazed figure from across the door called out to him.
I let out a heavy sigh repeatedly, the feeling getting bigger but I couldn't reveal it to anyone.
Even to click on the call sign for my father, I was unable to do so.
I just stared back and forth like a man with no purpose. My heart is anxious, but I don't know very well what form of anxiety it is. And I'm worried too, but I don't know what I'm worried about.
Maybe because of the tremors of the fallen tree, I want to run but do not know where to go.
The phone lit up, I quickly picked it up, my smile faded. It turned out that it was not an answer from Firhan but rather the father who sent me a message.
I'm getting moody, staring at my cell phone screen.
"dad.." called me in a less excited tone from across the phone.
"iyya boy.. Is there a problem..?"
"no, I almost got hit by a fallen tree near the bus stop well." I told him
"father, yes, you are in the mosque, right..? I'll catch up with you in a minute." Without asking my consent, I turned off our phone.
An hour, two hours, three hours passed very slowly. I could not say a word this second, the weather was clear after the heavy rain was pouring from morning to sublime. Notifications appeared, no longer from Firhan. From the father, he said that the vehicle broke down and jammed the effects of the fallen old tree.
I breathed heavily to so many times with a heavy, painful feeling.
Time passed, should Firhan have arrived and set foot here.
I tried to call her number but she was not active, all her social media was like that.
"the citilink aircraft with flight number QZ-741 from Jakarta has landed."
Hearing the announcement I immediately headed to the pick-up spot, five minutes away, ten minutes and fifteen minutes passed I could only pass by watching each passenger who came out after each carrying their luggage. There was no Firhan among all the crowds of passengers from Jakarta. I took a long step, trying to call her number who still hasn't been connected.
"sir.. I'm sorry I got on a citilink plane from Jakarta..?"
"iyya is right."
"previously from Medan?"
"yes, it's right" he replied again.
"oh well sir thank you."
"oh iyya sir for a minute.."
I stopped the stroller. He stopped again and looked at me
"last time in Jakarta I was late to fly..?"
"yes, we were waiting around three passengers if not wrong who entered last before the plane wanted to take off."
"oh yes, thank you sir."
He passed and my steps grew more and more limp as I stood. I'm still trying to dial Firhan's number, despite repeated responses to "the number you're going to is off."
I was still trying to walk, but I could no longer soak my tears that were slowly starting to melt due to my mood.
I failed to meet him today.
I will wait until he comes, maybe he misses the plane, my heart whispered
But I was too carried away, always unable to think positively when faced with things like this.
Stupidly I who always torment myself with insolence, too weak. I can only hide in my heart.
Two more kloter arrived, I was almost desperate to keep walking around and around looking at some unfamiliar face, not my husband.
I was pensively pensive in the row of chairs, the heavy hands of someone placed on top of my head calming my increasingly loud cries, I hugged him.
