LIKA LIKU THE ACTOR

13. SECRETE

Somehow a sense of comfort enveloped my heart when communicating with Jhon but I do not want to drag on with this comfort because I am still afraid of my feelings and circumstances that are still injured I do not want to feel this even becomes a shame for me in the future.I must continue to be wise I do not want to be complacent with the situation again although honestly I am very happy with the treatment of Jhon against me.

long story short my days become very peaceful when every day every moment even every second Jhon is always there for me but I am still with a careless attitude and do not give any hope because our conversation is still with normal boundaries and just ordinary friends in public even though at the time of chat or in other places is very different.

the more days I get closer to Jhon and start not thinking about mas Dani who went somewhere because until now never again contact me but I also have been cuek bodo very, very,I no longer respect because my mind is very sick and not strong anymore even though I still love but the pain overcame my love for Dani mas.

"hey.. Lo why? You rarely sleep in my hostel now? wh why? because it has broken up with Dani?". said melfri pouty

" mad Lo ya.not that I just want to sleep at home aja bokap I'm sick again Mak".

" oh yes already ", said melfri as she moved away from me

actually, I rarely go to the boarding house solely because I do not want to meet with mas Dani and want to forget the memories at the boarding house. I want to open a new page and want to live a normal life without having to be gossiped by others I want to make my family proud of me who has only made a burden for my parents.

drettttt dretttt

my daydreams instantly crumpled to hear my phone ringing.when I saw it coming from Jhon

" hmmm".

" hello". I said pick up the phone

" helo. where's bi? come on next door. I'm here". said Jhon on the phone

" okay, soon I'll go down with Caca ". said me while turning off the phone

soon I went to the cafeteria next door and met up with Jhon and the other friends while smoking, coffee and lunch as well. right beside me Jhon sat down and started the conversation while joking I also replied with a joke without any taste, I am comfortable telling a story with jhon but I do not want to show my comfort more deeply I do not want to baper and do not want to barepin others.

after it was finished and the clock showed at 12:50 pm I and Caca went back to the office to continue my work had not reached my desk had ads WA entrance which was none other than Jhon

" goodbye to work ". wrote her in the message WA. I just smiled thinly and I replied

" yes ".

at 8 o'clock it's time to go home. As usual I say hello melfri and solboy first before going home

" mak.sol I go home first yes". I said as I waved my hand

" don't stop first". said melfri

" i won't go straight into the night".

I went home by busway and when I got home I just saw hp and ternyat there WA from Jhon asking if I had gone home yet, I immediately replied to him instantly

" i'm sorry Jhon. I just saw hp. this just got home".

did not expect the response was quite fast less than a few seconds I WA immediately there was a reply

" losing. whereas it was going to take her home together" . reply again .

I smiled thinly and a little GR without me realizing my heart was very happy

" nothing.other times".I replied as if

and WA also continued to discuss marriage out of nowhere the clear beginning of our discussion to the level of marriage and my language also so changed by itself that was said "I am so me" . and vice versa , it feels a little strange because the Jhon I know outside is a joking and gookil but at the moment I feel he is very mature and serious.

" ahhh, I don't want to assume any further. just walk".

it does not feel the time has shown at 01.00 means I AM the same WA Jhon has been 3 hours without me noticing

" it's late I'm going to sleep first".

like that and from day to day more and more communication without realizing me and Jhon become close. I told him the details of my past until now and vice versa he also told his past his beginning. I felt embarrassed and awkward telling my life but with the response of him who accepted me for who I was I was so moved but it has not made me believe in him once again I do not want to take any risks I just live it according to the plot.

jhon's beginning was unexpected and very surprised at my relationship with mas Dani, he was very sorry about it, he was very sorry about it, at that time I resigned whatever happened but the unexpected came out words from Jhon that made me wipe a little tears

" why did you get in touch with Dani? he already has a wife?". he said, holding his hair

" yes, how it happened. someone wants to thank me, I'm not grateful, not even nothing".

jhon took my hand and said

" that's the past, right now I'm your future.I accept you if there's any origin promise it won't be like that anymore".he said brandishing his pinky finger while smiling bitterly with a little wiping the water in the corner of his eyes

as time went by we felt we had each other. felt cared for each other. I don't know when I started either, but I feel that now I'm very comfortable.

the word "SERIUS" came out of Jhon's mouth but I can not give an answer I want PDKT term of today mah because I do not want to take the risk again for the umpteenth heartache

" i'm honestly very comfortable with you but I don't want to spend my time in vain. If I relate to men I want to get married soon instead of dating".

" i'm ready".I replied, holding my hand

I haven't told anyone about my relationship, including melfri and solboy, because I don't think I'm ready yet and I need to know first what Jhon really is. I do not want to brag first fear it even so benalu so I keep meetings first before everything is clear I do not want to publish this relationship because on the basis of this relationship there is no commitment whatsoever

" next month I'm invited to my friend's wedding.you want to come with me not".

" it is okay".he answers casually

" but I don't have a condo shirt".I said again testing how it responds

" yes, I bought it". he said casually

" hhh. don't have any money".

" have bought an easy money problem".he said back while winking

disgusted the times I saw her but also happy. I tried to scroll shopee and not long ago I found the dress that I was looking for directly I SS and I sent to Jhon not until 1 minute there was a reply from my message

" okay.take it "write the WA message

I was deliberately looking for a rather expensive price but the response was mediocre. well, I bought it and he transferred it, but I'm not happy that there's still a lot to prove if he wants to be serious with me

it's H day and I went to my friend's party with her. I wore the dress she bought, she said, dress up as beautiful as possible and different from usual while Jhon wears matching clothes with my clothes.

" it's good". he said

" yes ", I answered while holding his hand into the party building where the event is called my friend.

there was very lively and I also did not forget to capture my photo with Jhon and I uploaded it but I did not show Jhon's face only his hands I post let everyone be curious and later once I have a clear commitment I will publish

" improve the picture". I said showing it to Jhon

" good.but this is ugly". he said while showing my SW in his cellphone where there is only Jhon's hand without his face visible.I immediately laughed out loud and said

" patience".

after I finished the post a few seconds later my phone rang not once but a few times when I saw it turned out all of my friends were kepo, various questions attacked me, such as asking #who'swhat? and there are also those who second-guess my response is just laugh and my answer is just "patient"

actually I didn't mean to keep all this from them I just wanted to clarify. convince myself of the relationship that I am living now if it is clear and I am sure of Jhon I will definitely write this relationship.