I Want to Be Happy, too

Episode 15's

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A week after the incident, I received news that my grandmother in the village died.I felt devastated and very devastated when I heard the news conveyed by my aunt.

Without thinking long, I immediately called my husband to ask permission to go home.Since he certainly can not go home with me, especially he counted just entered.

"Grandmother I died mas.." I said.

"Died?When?"ask her.

"So, after the Ashar prayer he said."

"I want a repairman right now,"

"Don't be a repairman now, it's already late at night.It's better you wait until tomorrow morning.I'm afraid you will get there in the middle of the night and alone no one accompanies." he explained.

"But I want to see Grandma one last time."

"Yes I know, know the most important thing now is your safety on the road later.Definitely your parents will also answer as I." he replied.

I was silent and dissatisfied with the answer he gave me.

"You'd better calm yourself now and tomorrow morning you'll get back on the bus the earliest."

"I'm sorry, because I can't accompany you.You know for yourself, I just got in here." he continued.

"Yeah......."

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In the morning, at half-hour 5 am. I asked for Naya tea, to take me to the usual place her bus stopped.

Fortunately, not long after I arrived the bus did not come long.I also immediately say goodbye to Naya tea.

During the trip, my feelings were not good.This is the second time for me to lose the person I love the most and mean in my life.

Even in his last moments, I was neither beside him.I also did not forget to send a message to my superiors and ADM, to inform this news.

Yes though, actually the next month the employment contract is over.I decided not to take or renew the new contract, he said,because I'm determined to go with my husband to move to work he's now.I want to know the truth that's there.

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I considered this incident, as a moment for me to calm my mind as well.But I intend not to tell the problem I found to my parents.

Remembering, now is not the right time for me to tell it.Moreover, I have no evidence to point out the mistakes of my husband.

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And finally I arrived home at exactly 2 pm.It just so happened that I got off the bus picked up by my neighbor's son.

Like what happened when my grandfather died, I didn't even have a chance to see my grandmother's face one last time.

I could only cry it over the mound of earth that buried it.I cried so much and blamed myself that could not accompany him to the end.

My mother's sister tried to calm me who was crying, when actually in my heart was crying over my marriage which is not okay now.

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The next day, when I was with bi Nuri went to the district office to take care of the yellow letter.Because it is, the requirement for me to get a leave of absence, I have to bring a yellow letter or a certificate of grandmother's death.

There I accidentally met Ulfa, a friend when I was in High School.Continue to be a neighbor and close brother Rafi as well.

"I didn't think we could meet here" he said.

"It's a coincidence huh.How are you?" ask me.

"Good......"

"I heard you were married well, sorry well when you were married I did not come and only my mother represented.At that time, the reason I just entered work in Tangerang." he explained.

"It's okay......"

"Oh yes, you've heard no news from Rafi.I heard she next week will be married to our underclassmen.You remember not her name is Soleha, her children justad near our school first." he explained.

I was silent and shocked to hear the news that was conveyed by Ulfa just now.Because indeed, my relationship with Rafi ended unclear.

Whether it was me or Rafi, we didn't say that our relationship was over.However, it was our circumstances and our disconnected communication that caused me and her to separate.

"Oh that, I just heard."

"So of course, I also have not had communication with him for a long time" I continued.

Ulfa was silent and seemed like she wanted to say something.

"Why Ulfa?" ask me.

"Actually, if you want to know.Rafi did not pass into the police school.At that time, he was very shaken and closed himself with anyone.More,I heard the reason he got into the police force was because he wanted to realize your wishes, which at that time was his girlfriend" he explained.

"What do you mean?", I asked.

"Yes at that time he failed to enter the police and he was sick for several months.His parents had brought him to the city to get treatment.Perhaps, he was sick,that's the reason why he's cut off ties with you until now."

"Moreover, now you are married.I do not know, actually what kind of relationship you two to the end can end like this." continued Ulfa.

I was immediately stunned and felt guilty about Rafi, she must have suffered all this time because of me.

"But, you two are now happy with your choices, I don't mean anything, tell this to you,"

"Thank you, I'm very grateful.Because thanks to you, I can know the true circumstances.Although now, I can no longer be with him." I timpal.

"But I hope, you didn't tell me about our meeting this heart.I'm just afraid, later it will even bother him back." I continued.

"Yes I know,"

"You know, when I used to dream that I could be a brother to you.The feeling will certainly be exciting, because you can be my brother.But yes, the fate of God no one knows." he said.

"Yeah......."

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After chatting for a long time, I immediately say goodbye and approached bi Nuri who was waiting for me beside the road.

"Who is he?" ask bi Nuri.

"My old High School friends, we just met again after a long time apart."

"Oh that....."

We both went straight home, all the way my mind was messed up.Apanyang in up Ulfa earlier made me feel guilty towards Rafi.

All this time, I was the one who was less trying to maintain my relationship with Rafi and left her just like that.