HATE VEILED WOMEN

44

" crucise? What happened to my wife, sir?" ask the police.

" i don't know the victim of the father's wife's accident or not because the victim until now we have not been able to find, and the car with the xxxx license plate has exploded" said police there.

" god it's my wife's car sir,

didn't you find anyone there? Where's the incident, sir?" I'm full of worries.

" jalan xxx please come here, I will explain the incident in detail at.." he said immediately I disconnected the telephone connection unilaterally and immediately ran into the office to take the key, handpone, and wallet after asking another math teacher to replace my class.

I ran as hard as I could towards the parking lot of my car, not caring about the surprised look of the student outside who was looking at me strangely, not a little can I hear the whispers of schoolgirls who say I look very handsome and cool when I run. But I don't care that because I think only one is SILLA...

After finding my car, I immediately plugged the gas at full speed into the address that the police had said.

.....

After arriving at the scene I could see father and mother in the distance, mother who was crying in the arms of father.

It hurts my heart to see what is happening right now, when I saw the yellow line of police going around the car that is very similar to my wife who is currently in a bad condition and still the appearance of explosive smoke due to some time ago, I calculated.

My legs were squeezing for a moment, but I still forced them to get close to the footing of my father, who was currently near the red car I hoped it wasn't Silla's. The car was in a collapsed position to the side on the edge of the abyss. But I still have to think positively!!!

God could not have taken it so quickly.

" Mother.." called me as I approached this couple who were busy hugging.

" Zaed.." replied the Mother who began to release the embrace of the father by showing her face to me.

" what's this, Bund, can't it be Silla? Can't it be bund?"

my heart wrenching question was indeed squeezed with a circle of tears that had soaked my handsome face.

" patient Zaed, mother also did not understand with all this, just after Silla got to the mother's house, Silla nitipin children to the mother he said Silla wanted to go to the minimarket because kangen eat ice cream, he said,

but..but instead so gini Zaed finally.kalo tau kayak gini so Mother will not Zaed ngijinin she made go.maafin mothera Zaed...." obviously Mother while crying back8 which makes me limp and finally sitting limp on the hard asphalt barefoot.

" quiet mother.this is all fate and there is nothing wrong here.we pray the best for Silla, yes Bund.." said the father who is still able to be heard in a pair of ears.

" maybe god!!! She's a good woman.ngga maybe you took it that fast.hiks...

Pleases...Don't take Silla first, I still need her, the children need her too, we all still need her presence, God" I cried so loudly pitifully with tears still reminiscing in my eyes, who immediately helped stood up father while holding me in his arms.

But just a blank stare on my retina, my body just can't afford to return my father's embrace.

"I must be strong this must not be possible Silla. I have to ask what happened and have to find his whereabouts now. "my stone is encouraging.

I immediately tried to run to the police and wanted to ask what happened.

" How could an accident happen to my wife, police officer?" ask the police.

" So, sir, since the road is deserted so we didn't find any witnesses, either, but according to our estimates this accident occurred when my wife's car hit a tree near the ravine because the collision of the father's wife's car and the tree was loud enough to make the car collapse to the side and after it exploded.

But here, oddly enough we didn't find any victims in the car, we're afraid they fell into a ravine there sir,

but we will try as much as possible sir to find the whereabouts of the victim," said the police who made me limp sit down right in front of him who was immediately helped to stand by him.

I step my feet closer to a very deep abyss filled with river water with waves that are quite swift, my cry can not be contained anymore, I can not resist, my limp feet did not stand up here and finally my two legs were gathered together by continuing to imagine Silla falling into that very deep abyss.

" god what's my wife's fault? She's a good woman why is her luck so bad?" shout me from the top of the abyss.

" god don't punish Silla, just punish me who is covered in this sin god!!! Hiks hiks.." My cries again roared.

"....we have to be sincere and firm what has happened, inget children at home, they also need you, you have to be strong, son" said Silla's father.

" but Zaed really needs Silla, Zaed can't live without her, Zaed can't raise a child alone," I said heartbreakingly who immediately got a father's embrace.

" you doain Silla is the best, if the allotment of Silla time in this world is over what can make Zaed, you must be sincere, you calm your mother's father and your father's mother, we're all ready to help you raise a child, Zaed,"

dad said incline but instead make me cry even more.

....

After that, my father took me home to see my son at the mother's father's house. Arriving at my father's house my heart felt empty during the trip I tried to calm myself so that the children did not feel sad about this.

" father.." welcome my son who was soaked in stone help Mr. Tono wash the car in the yard.

" duh..kok son this handsome father wet wet wet anyway? What kind of wind?" I asked the two-year-old boy who was even met with a crisp laugh.

" i'm sorry den, I was the one who stepped up with Rasya to play water because baby Tisya from earlier fussy continues so den Rasya was also crying continuously, so I invite aden Rasya to play so not to cry continuously."

obviously, Mr. Tono, made me think that maybe the little baby knew the condition of the bundle.

It is true that the inner bond of a mother and child is very close, plus Tisya is still a child so more sensitive to his feelings.

" ohh yes thanks pak tono, I have done playing Rasya, I went inside first yes sir," said my message to pak Tono.

" yes, yes, den.."

" well..nda ana?" (well...where's mother?)

ask this little boy who made my heart flutter again.

" hmm.bunda tonight, bobok to the house kakung sma Uti first yes dear, so later brother sleep with father first." said I held back the cry that immediately called his head weak.

Ohh yes kakung uti it's my mother's father's call, if grandparents call mother's father Silla.

" dadain bathe brother now yes." said my possessed her back with a sad look.

Maybe he felt uncomfortable, because the day he spent with Silla.

After bathing and dressing my son, I went to the kitchen with him to make milk for him. Because Rasya only drank Silla in a month with a variety of persuasion finally he wanted to leave Silla's breast milk and switch back to formula milk, because of the age he has also entered the age of two years who should not drink breast milk again.

" hmmm...honey usually mother love how many spoon of milk?" I asked, tangent,

because usually I just keep the children doang in their room, not to make milk.

Here I just found out, how his presence really means a lot.

" (answered by him)pon nda ja yah..."

(phone) said my son, which made me no longer hold back my tears.

I aligned my body to her tiny body which I immediately rewarded with a tight hug with tears that had spilled down my cheeks.

" hiks.hiks.." My tears could not be held to unspoken.

" well.." finally called him who made me stop my sobbing and began to look at him gently, he spread his tiny hands to stroke my two cheeks that were already soaked with tears, my heart aches right now to imagine this son in front of me if he knows where his drowning mother doesn't know.

" ata.unda by angis, "

(kata.bunda can not cry)

said my son's lisp, emang Silla's mother who is very smart until my son who is just two years old is already familiar with various words and able to respond to the speech of others, he said, therefore, Silla and I have always been very careful to teach every word that he will say because this child has a very strong memory.

" i'm sorry dad ya.ngga can cry father.." said I answered nod his head.

Seeing Rasya made me re-remember the good times where there was still Silla who made me miss me, added me.

" why is this in a hug?" ask the person who appeared behind Rasya.

" asa.mualaikum utii" greeting Rasya that makes the mother kiss him anxious.

" dear waalaikumusalam, how is Rasya healthy?" ask mom and I just be the audience.

" healthy, unda ana tii, " asked Rasya to surprise me not only me but I also look shocked.

" hmm.mom rest again dear, mother like soy sauce.." replied the mother with an occasional glance at me.

" unda apek..why uti ketini? Uti ndak ndagain unda? ata atyah unda inep umah utii," said Rasya panjang.

" ohh yes.hmm B..Mother at home uti, but like Mother ketapean deh..makanya mother ask Uti here to keep Rasya, because mother can not come here," said mother brought him up which even made me shed my tears again but immediately I removed it quickly before Rasya knew.

" Asya angen unda." said Rasya hugging mother tightly.

This is only a day what if forever, do I have to lie to God? Innervine surrendered.

"so Rasya why is dad's hug?" said mom diverted the conversation.

" dad angis ndak isa ikin milk," answered Rasya who made me laugh.

" yaudah let Uti ya make her milk," said the mother who was immediately embraced by Rasya.

As long as you make milk I keep asking how much water, how many spoons, why you have to pack cold water too, why the pacifier must be washed and others are the pokonya a lot. You see, I think I should be able to meet the needs of my children if God wants me to raise them.

" is it booby mom?" I asked the mother who was still watching Tisya in the baby box.

" yes, my dear, it's broken." replied the mother.

Ohh yeah I asked to sleep in the room with Rasya, Tisya and Silla hope I if there's a miracle that brings her back here tonight.

" yaudah yok, bobok Rasya.." take me to my son who is still staring at his little adek beside the mother who was immediately embraced.

" well.ata unda osok igi ulu,"

said Rasya who stopped my steps when he wanted to lay my body on his soft mattress.

Good memories of Silla will always be imprinted in my life and my son's future.

" yaudah yok, brush your teeth first,"

I said to follow him from behind to get into the bathroom.

" well.acain a muk ayak for his taste"

said Rasya if this time I can not understand and when we are in bed.

" Read what, baby? Muk's?"

ask him who is directly in the back of his head.

" ukan.a muk" replied he was also anxious with a tone that began to rise.

" amok? What the hell is that, baby?" I also asked who was anxious.

" Maybe Rasya Al-Mulk means, because Silla can not sleep if you do not read Al-Mulk first." said Mother who was in the room with a pacifier containing milk for Rasya.

I'm sorry baby, your memories are still ringing in this world, thank you baby has left sweet memories here, my mind is very proud of him.

" ohhh father's son wants to be read Surah Al-Mulk?" tanyaku who answered his enthusiastic nod.

" Zaed, Rasya has a toothbrush, right?"

ask the mother I know.

After Rasya received the milk pacifier and began to mendot at that time the chant of al-mulk verse was spoken on my lips. In every verse I read while I was reciting my sweet memories with Silla, she would not want to sleep before I recited al mulk beside her, and so Rasya and maybe Tisya who will not be able to sleep if they do not hear al-mulk's pronunciation from Silla's lips, maybe I should be able to get used to reading it so that they do not feel lonely for Silla's departure.

...

" Ooee..oeee" the cry of my little baby that made me wake up right away from my dream.

I carried my daughter with a very soft and slow swing while feeding her with a pacifier that contained Silla.

Luckily Silla left some breast milk in the bottle that Mother put in the refrigerator. After Tisya regained his composure he was still reluctant to fall asleep.

After I finished drinking the breast milk I just put it back in the baby box I really hope if he does not cry again when I put it back. Thank God fate is on my side at the moment, Tisya is still calm while staring brightly up. When I thought he could afford me to stay, I would just step my feet into the cold room to fetch some ablution water.

After my face returned bright with water wudhu I prepared my own prayer tool right next to the baby box Tisya and right next to the bed Rasya who was still asleep.

" God this morning I will face you alone, but I hope you will send him again to accompany me to your God,

I'm sincerely not with him this morning, but please the next morning let him be with me, I can't live without him" my mind when going to start prayer.

I moved my body in the cold this morning alone to face the Creator, although there is no mummy behind me but I am grateful in the middle of my bow I am still in the middle of my little angel angel.

" Lord, I confronted myself alone in the cold of the dew this morning. Lord I am only a weak man of your creation who is covered in sin, I do not feel worthy of this self to ask, but what power I am cannot live without Your help and power, You,

I thank you very much for giving you the strong feeling you gave today, but God is the only one who can know the true content of my heart.

My heart aches now, God, I can't live my life without her beside me.

God this morning I asked for only one, grant whatever my wife asks, if she has the cold assignment your angel to cover her, if she is in darkness assign your angel to light her, if she's in pain, assign your angel to take the pain away.

God take care of my wife wherever she is now, I leave a longing and I ask to send my longing to her God, and I ask not to torture my wife and my children just torture me god, I sincerely.

And the one who deserves to replace himself now in the cold waters of the river is only me.

I'm god, not Silla...."

my crying can't be contained anymore.

I can act as if I am strong in front of everyone but I will look very weak in front of Him because I am just a helpless creature who must accept it with a free heart.

After finishing praying before my god, to wait for my Adhan to open the verse of the Qur'an and start reading it while occasionally glancing at my daughter who is still awake with her sleeplessness, maybe she wants to accompany her father, my inner being.

Finally, Adzan awakens the universe. And at that time Rasya also woke up from his sleep, because every morning he always followed me to the mosque to pray together with me even though sometimes Rasya even fell asleep in the mosque, but Silla said papa was not let alone the important thing he could get used to the mosque. Yes indeed from a small Silla had told Rasya if the man prayed in the mosque be every magrib, he said, isya and dawn I took him to the mosque kalo zuhur same ashar Silla who accompanied my son to the mosque.

Indeed she is a woman who deserves two thumbs up, she is a gentle and patient woman although sometimes spoiled childish but that is natural with the nature of women generally.

" yah..ungu Asya udu yes." he said immediately passed to the canary bath and ablution because Silla always guided him from the beginning so now it is familiarized.

......

" mom, bund, I tipped the child's tentar ya. I want to run in the morning"

I asked my two mothers who were cooking vegetables. If Rasya same Tisya have played to the garden behind the house with both fathers for gardening because behind the mother's house there is a vegetable garden that grows well and dense.

" yes, just calm down, it's okay to go later to noon." said the mother who I immediately salami the two mothers and passed away.

Every walk of my run spent listening to my earphones hmm.not a song anyway but also not a solution will seem slovenly but the sound is very much missed, the sound of the village*n bercin*** me with Silla.

Because once I thought about our relationship without her knowledge, I was thinking about the memories of youth that I would see Silla when we were just as gray.

But unfortunately, fate had picked him up first, and in the end this memory of vidio only became a memory for me.

💔