For You Little Girl's

CHAPTER 6 MISSES

Arriving – arrived, I felt a chill on my face. I was surprised when the – man was already right in front of me with a glass of cold chocolate in his hand.

“Nih, dibol”, he said while offering the drink.

“And this take, think of it as a thank you”, he said again by thrusting a bracelet at me.

I also took the bracelet while drinking cold chocolate. For a moment, I watched the bracelet.

One word for this bracelet. Well-favoured.

When I raised my head to look at the bracelet giver earlier, only a gust of wind swept over me as the figure standing before me had already disappeared.

Hais, basic. I was like a jailangkung to play go without saying goodbye.

I could only grumble as I looked back at the beautifully circular bracelet on my left wrist covered by a hand cuff.

Her bracelet is beautiful. But, how do I feel familiar is it the same design of the bracelet? I think I've seen that. But where is it?

The day has begun to darken. The orange color that had graced the afternoon sky, has now begun to blur. I rushed to the dormitory, because magrib prayer time was coming soon.

...***...

The night sky looks so beautiful with – lights combined neatly lined garden lights. Flickering – flickering stars add a beautiful impression on the sky while surrounding the moon that shines brightly.

The night atmosphere accompanied me in doing my first assignment as a student here. Every now and then I look at the window with a smile looking at the sky that makes my heart rustle.

I saw Yira, my roommate who was also busy with her duties. Occasionally his forehead wrinkled indicating that he was thinking, then a moment later he smiled while nodding his head.

“Psst, Yira.what are you doing anyway?”,

Yira who felt her name called immediately turned her head towards me with a happy smile as if she had just gotten a discount voucher.

“Hehe, I again designed a painting”, he replied with a small laugh ending.

“Keep you want to paint what?”,

“The plan is, I want to paint a village. I tried searching to be a reference. Well, from some that I got, now I have thought of painting a village like what”, he explained that made me nod – head nods.

“Eh, Sa. The same guy you were in the park south of was your boyfriend”, asked Yira who immediately made me stop my activities.

“Pacar? Hahaha, not a boyfriend. He is my cousin, the son of my father's brother”, I replied with a laugh.

“I wasn't sure either. If I may know, since when have you veiled, Sa and even your hijab in tablets? If in the eyes of men – men mah, the future wife of idaman”, his curse that makes me shake my head.

“I was taught from childhood, Ra”, I replied while returning to focus on my duties.

The night was getting late, Yira was already asleep. I am the only one still awake. I saw a clock on the wall that almost showed me the night's sepulum.

Astaughfirullah, how can kebablasan gini anyway. Bawat, bawar again will anyone check into the room.

The task is not finished either. Anyway, the rules are a bit strange in my opinion. Time yes, must be checked into the room, feel stay in the boarding school I tuh. Also, this is the privacy of someone.

I also chose to pura – pura sleep in order to trick the builder who does night control. Not long after, a sound of someone coming inside. I peeked a little to see who was coming in.

Oh my goodness, Ms. Yani. Not tired of using all room check events, it's like a night patrol.

Huh, Mom. Back there, this stuffy can not breathe, because the blanket that is rolling my body is very thick.

Geez, that's why again, that's a person's privacy. Very similar to the activities of others.

Long enough, Bu Yani finally came out of my room. I immediately threw the blanket down to the floor.

“True – is really strange this hostel. All who are in this school area, strange bin suspicious”, I continue to grumble while stepping towards the balcony of the room.

It turns out more beautiful, when viewed from the balcony rather than just behind the window.

My smile grew even more when I saw the star – stars are still loyal up there as if waiting for me and greet my night.

Hey, star. You who are far away there look so beautiful and charming to every eye that sees.

I feel my eyes are so comfortable staring at you long – long until drowsiness was reluctant to greet me.

Suddenly my heart became sad. Mom's shadow arrived – arrived crossed my mind. Dancing is beautiful as if you are on the theater stage.

Almost every night, I would look at the night sky decorated with – stars while occasionally laughing, then I fell asleep in the arms of mother.

Mom, how are you? Sara misses mom. Missing the warm embrace that always sends me to dreamland while stroking the top of my head.

There's a hard taste I'm describing. A sense that flows, then leaves a trace of wanting to meet. Scrubbing old memories, making me feel more overwhelmed with daydreams that momentarily greet.

A taste that makes my chest and heart tight. But, life is about choice and I choose to walk away from you for a moment.

Is this the feeling of longing that people – people tell? Can I hold on for a long time?

Will it all be finished with an ending that matches my expectations? Can I expect something that sounds impossible?

Not feeling it, tears spilled down my cheeks. A true taste makes me even more claustrophobic. I cried in silence while looking up at the night sky, hoping to ease the longing that was growing.

Hiks.. hiks…

Strictly, O Rabb. Can I meet him?

Can You grant my request, even if it is a false shadow?

Can God, please…

The sky that had been clear was suddenly cloudy, then it rained quite profusely as if understanding my mood.

I stretched out one of my hands to catch a speck of rainwater that began to wet the part of the earth I stopped by. Chilly. That's how I felt when the water touched my palm.

My soul seemed to float, flying with the wind and falling along with the rainwater. Flying met a hope, then fell by a reality that made my defense weaker.

Hixes

Dad…

Only those – words can be said from my lips. It feels heavy just to say. Even my voice choked and seemed to disappear along with the departure of one of my precious angels.

Can I see you? Petting your face? Wipe you? And then smile at you? Can you see my smile, even if it's for a moment? Can't you, Dad?

Why your departure leaves deep wounds for me. A miss that I find hard to prevent. To let you go, I can't.

Honestly, I can't believe, if you're right – is gone, Dad. I can't believe that.

Is there a glimmer of hope for us to meet? Is there that chance?

Hiks.. hiks…

Please allow me to meet you, even if it's only in my pseudo-fiction. At least, I can feel your warm embrace that feels real, not just your mom's.

Can this fate live up to my expectations, Rabb? Can it?

It felt like my heart was again broken by the fact that my father was gone. And that's the fact I should understand. Not forcing something I couldn't possibly have.

...***...