Afraid to Widow

Chapter I (Jihan Orianthie)

"If it is my destiny to part from her, make it easy to forgive her mistakes." I cried in the long prayer mat on one-third of the night.

At first I thought marrying Amar, a man much younger than me was the right decision. Mom really liked that guy. Mama said her religion and family members were good. Dear wasted. I believe the old man's rida is God's rida.

Marrying her was beautiful at the beginning. A year later, he began eating liver. Age does not lie. He was like a boy thirsty for play. The longer, the more irritated. I'm not strong to face it. Until I am at the crossroads of being a young widow or continuing to marry at the risk of adding to the inner wound?

My story with him starts from the next page.

...***...

Mama looked at me from toe to head as soon as I got out of the room. Instantly glares. "And Mama told me, you're a beautiful dancer."

"It's me and and, Ma."

"And what? It's no different than usual."

"Dandan make powder is just like a thin lipstick. Hehe." I whinesan. 

"Udah spelled out the maximum grooming. The kebaya you love isn't dipake?" 

"Mama why the hell tell me to dance and make kebaya everything?" 

"There are important guests soon."

"Who?"

"Your soul mate." 

Now it's my turn to glare. "Mama what the hell. My friends without my knowledge. I've said many times I don't want to be fooled."

"If you are not betrothed, you want to marry until what age? Inget, you're 27. Are you tired of being asked when you have a ghost? You meet in the mulu room, when do you try to mate?" 

The reason I bumped into that room was because I was freelance. Writing a novel on the platform. From the local platform to abroad I jajaki. My income is good. 5-10 million. 

"But not so…"

In the middle of my storm, Mama, suddenly heard a knock on the door. 

"Assalamualaik." 

"Well, your soul mate is coming. The change of kebaya make-up clothes that you put in your room."

I comply. Then enter the room and change clothes with a kebaya. Fifteen minutes later, I went out again. How surprised when I saw my future mate turned out to be Ammar. 

Ammar is a neighbor next door. His arrival in this village was only six months. I admit I like him. He is handsome. Short hair, thick eyebrows, red lips and white skin. It is said that the neighbors, he just graduated from Cairo Egypt. 

"Our presence here to propose to Nak Jihan Orianthi for my son named Ammar Arfiandy. How's son Jihan, would you be willing to marry my son?" 

What dream was I yesterday? Since 2007 I have dreamed of being able to mate like Fahri in a novel or movie Verses of Love. However, I did not expect the dream to materialize now in the figure before my eyes. 

My tongue suddenly stifled. Don't know what to say. Replexibly can only nod. Even though I don't know him yet, I believe he is my best mate. Mom's Choice. God's choice too. 

I pulled Mama back first. "Why didn't you tell me I was the same as Ammar?" 

"Yes if you say, no surprise dong name. Sok-sokan refused matchmaking. Because the person is in front of the eyes, do not dwell nolak proposal."

"This time it's Mama's choice, right. You're my taste."

Mom and I went back to the living room. “Sorry long wait,” says Mama friendly.

I sat next to Mama. “Sorry Mr. Kiayi, the reason Mr. Kiayi proposed to me for Mas Ammar why? I feel the nashab of my family and the family of Mr. Kiayi is like heaven and earth. Very different far. Fear later Mr. Kiayi nyesel have my kayak son-in-law. I just haven't hijab,” I said politely. Yes, I pretended to be low and refused first.

 “What is the difference. We are in God's eyes the same. What distinguishes faith and taqwa.” Mr. Kiayi shifted his sitting position. “I used to and your mom was a boarding school in MA time. Well, your mama who encouraged me to continue learning so as to be ustaz and even kiayi. We are determined to match our children so that this friendship does not break.”

Hmmm .. it turns out the smell of old love has not been spread. Just pantes. If not, it is impossible for a kiayi to propose to a girl who prayed five at a time is still in vain. Accept it, huh?

“Udah accept. Opportunity does not come twice.” Mom seemed to know the worry of my heart.

I breathed heavily. “Bismillah, I am ready to marry Mas Ammar.”

“Alhamdulillah,” said Mama and Pak Kiayi together.

I hope it's the best decision.

...***...

The wedding day arrives. Due to the Covid 19 pandemic, weddings were held in a simple manner. The guests present were only the nuclear family and closest friends. 

"Jeez Jihan from three years ago you married the same saucy Cairo graduate guy finally materialized too."

"Yes, thank God. I just didn't expect it."

"From now on I will continue to marry my young master/CEO. Who knows if my genitals materialized also like lo."

"Good luck with ria."

While waiting for other guests to come, I held my HP first. "Selfie post on FB, IG and WA!" 

"What the hell, we've been taking pictures."

"It's a freestyle version with no photographer's direction. Come onl. Please."

He's nodding. He smiled broadly at the HP camera. Clik. Saved photos. I was immediately posted to all social media. 

The caption 'Alhamdulillah, I've been legitimate. I myself did not expect to be able to find a soul mate whose character is like Fahri and the characters of novels that I usually write. You guys don't stop halu. Who knows if your thing will happen in the years to come.' 

In an instant my social media account was filled with likes and comments. On average, they congratulate. There was one comment that tickled. 

 

Myafa16

Ah, I want to be diligent in hammering ah. Who knew Bryan would come into the real world. 

 

I just smile at myself and read the comments. Shortly after, the other guests arrived. One of them is Grizelle Prameswari, my friend from High School. Wait for him to bring a man. Who is that man?

Grizelle's approaching. Then salaman and kiss the right cheek and left cheek. "Geez, long time no news, you know your marriage."

"Alhamdulillah, my soul mate has come. No more clucking. Uh, who are you? Follow me dong."

"Aamiinu. Doain aja soon I followed you to the guarantee."

...***...

First night with Ammar. 

He and I sat on the bed with pillows. "Mas, this is our first night" I said, winking. 

Oh yeah, I forgot to say. Ammar is five years younger than me. Since he was legally my husband, I called him 'Mas' in his honor. 

 

"Why then?" 

His eyes continued to be on the HP screen. I lyrics HPnya, apparently playing Mobile Legend. 

"Aren't you going to do that to the apostle?" 

He stopped playing games. He then looked at me sharply while bringing his face closer to me. My heart is beating fast. This is the same as the scene I used to write when the character was about to kiss his partner. 

"Don't ngarep. I married you for the sake of happiness. So don't ever mess with me. Wanna?" 

Give all my imagination about the romance of the first night with the person I love. Hmmm.. It looks like this wedding is going to be heavy. But I like a challenge. I'm sure I can get his heart. 

...***...

I woke up hearing the dawn. When I touched the bed, it was a shock that there was no Ammar. It turned out that he had woken up first and was well dressed; chef's clothes, sarongs and peci were all white. 

"You're going to the mosque, Mas?" 

"You're the guy at home, yeah. Inget, if your mama nusil kepo nanya malper us, do not need to be told," he said with a sharp tone. 

I'm manyun. "Yes. Ja. I don't want my mom to be disappointed either."

He's out of the room. I got out of bed to get water. It was like Mama was out of her room. 

"Ciyeee. Seger is awake. How's MP? How many rounds is your husband?" 

 

"Ih, what the hell is Mama nanya. Shame to know." I turned my face. Afraid that Mama is suspicious. "Udah ah, I want ablution first. At dawn abis."