A Pair of Lotus Flowers
Pain Dismissed
Finally I was able to get out of the hospital and go home papah with Beni and my baby.While my mom and Daddy decided to return to Bali, it felt like I came home from a long vacation and returned home by bringing souvenirs, but the souvenirs I brought were the little babies who had been in my arms.
"I still don't think we have kids, Ra" Beni said as she tidied my clothes into the closet.
"Me too, I didn't expect this beautiful baby to come out of my own stomach hehe"
"You are a great mother Ra, you have survived even though I am not beside you" said Beni who approached me and kissed me on my forehead.
"Hopefully you can also be a good father like you said before" I said with a smile.
"When do I say rich?" Ask Beni astonished.
"When you were drunk you came to my bathroom when I was soaking.You were sobbing me,so I tell you that I'm pregnant with your child again.Hemm but unfortunately you forgot the incident" I explained.
"I think it was Ra's dream, I actually remember it even though it was only vague" Beni said.
"Yes have missed it now it is also not important, because the truth has been revealed Ben."
Benipun just smiled, he then sat beside me and watched Azzura who was asleep.Once he looked at me, like comparing my face with Azzura's face.
"You are both beautiful in my eyes" Beni said as she kissed my lips.
It has been a long time since the last time we kissed, it turns out now it tastes sweeter and also warmer because our worries have been gone all along,we realized that I had just given birth and we couldn't go on any more than this.
The next day, I as a housewife actually began.I and Beni look less sleep because all night alternately keep Azzura awake.
"You're newlyweds but how come there's no spirit?" Papah meredekku.
"Well, if we were married before Azzura maybe we were excited every day, but this is a different story" I replied lethargicly.
"Yes yes papah know, you just enjoy the time to be a parent.But you Ben, what is your marriage with the Princess so it is done next month?" Ask Beni.
"So pah, Beni can not refuse or ask to step down again.Beni know this is Beni pah's fault, so Beni must be responsible" said Beni.
"But are you okay Nara see your husband marrying another woman?" Ask papah.
"Nara can't lie Nara's feelings, Nara is actually jealous pah.But Nara can't be selfish, the baby in the Princess' womb also needs her father."
****
A month later, the wedding day Beni and Putripun finally arrived.If people know maybe I will be stamped mad woman for pairing a suit and tie for her husband who will marry again.But I do not care about it,the important thing is I can still be with Beni.
When I, Art and Papah entered the room where the marriage contract, everyone was seen whispering to each other.They were gossiping about me being married to my own adoptive brother until I had a child,and I took my husband to the wedding to marry another woman.
During the marriage contract, Beni looks nervous.She several times mispronounced her pledge when she saw me.Akupun finally tried to go from Beni's vision and chose to give ASI to Azzura.
The stifling day was over, I went home with Papah and Azzura.We left Beni at the Princess' house with a sense of unwillingness.So did Beni who was sad when he saw we had to go home.
"Are you okay, baby?" Ask papah at dinner.
"No reward, Nara is okay" I said with a smile.
"If you have trouble keeping Azzura in the middle of the night, do you wake up?"
"Yes pah, Nara asks Papah for help"
After dinner, I went back to my room and played with Azzura.Meminds feel like there is something missing when Beni is not here.Usually before bed he always bothers his son who I'm giving ASI.
When midnight Azzura woke up and I had enough trouble to calm him who kept crying.I was confused how, I was also tired of having to stay up every night, added now Beni is not here.
Unknowingly I immediately cried sobbing, I felt frustrated with my life.I have to have a child at the age of 21 years and I also have to take care of my baby alone,my husband was at his second wife's house.
Hearing Azzura who kept crying, finally papah entered my room.He who saw me and Azzura both crying also looked confused.Then papah tried to hold Azzura while hugging me.
"You are patient Nara, you know this is not easy for you" said Papah.
"Yes pah, Nara thought Nara would be fine even though she saw Beni married the Princess, but it turned out not to be pah.Na..Nara heartache pah, Dada Nara tight" said I as I sobbed.
"No one is okay to see his loved ones with each other" Papah said as he tried to calm me down.
Is this also what Papah feels when he sees mamah married again to someone else?Turns out it feels like this sick and turns out papah is tougher than I thought.
After Azzura and I were both calm, I went straight out of my room and let me rest.
The next day it turns out I woke up late, I saw Azzura was no longer there beside me.Maybe papah who brought him down, I thought.But it turns out when I came out of the room, I heard the voice of Beni chatting with papah.
"Ben, can't you just stay here for a while?" Ask Beni.
"Why pah?"
"Kanya Nara exposed to the baby blues, she looks very depressed.Every night she also cried because she felt alone to the point that Azzura cried too she let it so" replied Papah.
"It could not be reward, Beni was just married yesterday with the Princess, it is possible Beni immediately left the Princess to stay here.Now Beni is here because Beni kangen same Azzura" said Beni while looking to talk Azzura.
I immediately felt another sense of tightness in my chest.It turns out this feels like being cheated, this feels like it can not have it completely.I finally returned to the room, I tried to calm my mind.I hope I can survive with Beni for a long time, I hope I can stay with Beni,because my son needs his father.
