While the Script is Drawn

Mosaic 3 - Break My Heart

Tonight, you're dressed better than usual.

Usually, you only wear jeans, this time you wear cloth pants. Wearing a shirt, not a prada shirt. Your hair is neatly combed. Slippery. You really did shave your hair. Your hair has been dated. Disappear your proud hair. On your feet are also used shiny black pantofel. Wish with all that it could cover your every bitter move.

If you can be seen like a cloud, then every inch of your steps towards the crowd will present a cloud of cloud. Like a pile of black snow. And then raze water grains as big as marbles. And it quickly became a flood that drowned everyone in the room. Those people will be out of breath and know how much your heart has been bleeding.

Some people are greeting you now. People who know you. People who know your story. Those people threw smiles. Throw in the question of how are you. Also throwing unspoken questions. How are you feeling this time? That's about that unspoken question. And you throw a smile back. Throwing answers I'm fine. And throw in unspoken answers. My feelings melted. That's about your unspoken answer.

And there, two people stood gracefully. Two people became stars this time. A man wearing a dapper suit with a fluffy smile. And the other one, a woman dressed in a white dress with amazingly beautiful makeup. Makes your lungs go flat to see it.

There is a storm in your sea of hearts.

You remember, blind nights you came to his residence.

"Five years? We're just gonna waste five years?" Rhetorical and bitter, you ask.

"So, what do you want now?" he asked back.

You're silent. Can't answer. There was a strange popping out and now it's got your mind in check when the question comes out.

"This is the way" he said, breaking your silence.

Why are words lost at a time like this? When you need comfort for a satisfactory answer. Your ability to speak is evaporating.

Your hand moves in doubt like it wants to grab her hand, but you puff it out. Two humans who have been making love for years and feel every inch of their skin, suddenly reluctant to touch.

"You're with him. L'm with. Then what do you want? Then do what?"

And in the end only making love can answer your questions. Your love for the last time. After that night, it was all over. You're back to your life with your wife and son. And he will start living his new life with other people.

Your arms loosen, releasing his body. Your tense muscles begin to relax, resignedly letting it go.

But now you regret it. Since he left, your world is no longer the same. Your life is foreign. You're sad for something you know. You know after it's passed. You're gonna shed after her step away. You know, he's gone. His body, his heart, though it appeared before his eyes. There he was with someone else. Someone who will soon say a deal for him.

You keep stepping closer to him. He glanced at you. He knows you exist. It's in front of his sight. Either in his heart, it was still there or it was gone.

"Congratulations." Finally the word comes out of your mouth. This time you didn't say it like goodbye. It's not like an encounter either. Except consciousness.

You reached out and he welcomed her. There is a great vibration radiating to every cell of your body when your skin comes into contact with its skin.

"Thank you" he answered briefly.

That'sallthatis. Congratuations. And thank you. Worn out.

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Finished

Jepara, September 25, 2017