This Is It?

Chapter 31: Longing

There was a significant change in Metha's behavior after returning from her village. He became more quiet and closed. No more giggling jarring or humming discord from his mouth.

Huh! My brain was completely made to not stop working to observe the phenomena that were all around me.

I'm trying to find Metha at the hostel. All at once, I'd like to say hello to Ardi if I happen to meet. The intention just popped into my mind when I got the chance to get out of the house more loosely.

This dime job is really what I can bestow on Tommy, Revan, and Leo. However, I don't want them to know too much about my feelings and thoughts. If I open up the story to them too much, then they can turn around to identify me. Just let them “play” with the Kunyuk first.

The premonitions and whispers of the universe are quite accurate. Metha came out of her boarding house alone. Then, he walked in a direction that was not towards the campus. His eyes turned to the right and left as if observing the situation. His body movements were very suspicious.

I followed Metha's steps carefully. Before long, someone got out of the car, and approached Metha. I sneaked into a stall that was close to them. I also pretended to buy a snack so that my reconnaissance was perfect.

I focused my ears when Dita started chanting words.

“It looks like Bagas has started to like me. Actually, I say, the guy was quite encouraged to use attention in a row. After that, disappear for a moment to make him miss,” said Dita talking about me.

I take a closer look. He and Metha are like best friends. What plan do they really want to launch on me?

“But what if you are only allowed to vent with Bagas?” ask Metha.

Dita brings a smile. “Not a problem. That's where I'm going to make him comfortable as comfortable as I am. Once in his mind flourishes my name, I'll break his heart just like he broke my heart. Anyway, you should have attacked him slowly. Not make him be illfeel same lu.”

“Sorry to, Ta. My experience about this is still minimal,” said Dita.

I used to hear Ardi talking to Metha on the phone about me. I thought Metha was poisoned by Ardi. In fact, there is Dita who is hiding behind the scenes. Are they making a partnership?

I wondered who was the mastermind and who was the puppet among them? If I look deeper, Metha also has the potential as a regulator or story controller.

Ok. All right, the nameless trio. I'll follow your screenplay first as if I were a newcomer actor.

Dita and Metha left in a car that delivered Dita. Should I follow them? But in 20 minutes I have to go to class. I don't want to sacrifice college for the two women “gila”.

I walked back to campus. God loves me very much. He showed more falsehood about Dita and Metha.

Indeed, there is still a mystery that holds up, which is about how Dita and Metha can be friends like I saw earlier. Ah, but as time goes by all the veils must be exposed. The point is, I already know Dita's crafty plan.

The plan revealed for revenge was the same plan as mine. Now, two victories come into my grasp. First, he's the one I'm going to make love me more deeply. Second, when I broke her heart, she would realize her ambition was like the wind. I laughed in front of his face.

He thought I was being sweet to pour out the taste. Though, he's the one I'm gonna make dig his own pain grave.

Approaching the gloomy boarding house full of nestapa, I saw Ardi arranging a large bag on the motorbike. Is he going home?

I hastened my steps. However, there was a sad vibe running through my mind. Sendu immediately shadowed my eyes.

“Lu where are you going, Di? Want to go home?” ask me subtly.

“Not your business!” cynical answer.

Ardi added a lot of stuff on his bike. I concluded that he did not want to go home.

As soon as I was going to make sure, Ardi reached into his phone. He also seemed to renew his face to look bright.

“Halo, Well,” greet Ardi while directing his video call to me.

Hearing and seeing the face painted on Ardi's phone, my mind flinched. The body is also turbulent to resist sadness and longing. Dad, it feels like I haven't heard his simple words long enough.

Now, I can't reach out to Dad's voice like I used to. My identity has changed according to my ideals.

“Oh Yes, Dad. Ardi wants to know Dad with Ardi. He is handsome, rich, kind, and not arrogant. He's the most popular guy on campus, but so humble. He helped Ardi find a new hostel. Now he's coming here to help Ardi move. He's so nice, isn't he, Dad?” satir Ardi embraces me.

My tears are getting worse. Hold it! I have to be able to hold.

“Wah, I'm very happy to hear you have a very good friend there,” said Dad melagukan keharuan. “Whose name are you, son?” ask Dad to me who instantly increases my rate of longing.

I wanted to scream, call him to tell the story.

“Emm…. This…. A…. Ar. emmm…. My name is Bagas, Yah.” My tears as if a corner piled up behind the petals until they unconsciously chanted a connecting greeting of the bond. I breathed for a moment to hold back the cry that was about to hit the dam.

“Thank you very much huh, Bagas boy. Bagas wants to be my son's friend, Ardi. Ardi is shy and quiet. However, he is actually a submissive and studious child. He's Dad's pride. From SD to SMP always champion 1. However, during school in Jakarta the ranking declined. But I'm still proud of Ardi. That means competition in Jakarta is very tight. Ardi can learn a lot from Nak Bagas and his other friends,”, said the polite father.

A fella? Of course, there are no friends I have in Jakarta. The friend who is now around me is the legacy of this body exchange.

Dad hung up on the video phone. He said he was on his way home. As soon as I told him to be careful on the road. He also replied with a smile that was so soulful.

As bad as it looks and my life in the environment outside the house, Dad always looked at me as the perfect figure – figure who is expected to be a useful person in the midst of society.

I raise my head to face the sky. I put some more tears in my body. Then, I set foot to leave Ardi. My heart is soft, my mind is still.

“Lu where are you going, Gas? Don't you want to help me move?” ask Ardi quipped.

I stopped, and turned around. “When do I say that?”

Ardi shook his head in a sneering gesture. “Duh, Bagas! You're young but you're getting senile. You said in front of your dad when I said that you would help me move.” Ardi releases air through the mouth. “Ups! Sorry, sorry, I forgot. I have to rectify it immediately yes, if that was you chat with my father not your father.”

Goddamnit! The novelty that I cannot hide turns out to be well read by the Kunyuk.

“Lagian, I have to move boarding also because of you. Therefore, it is appropriate you help me transport my goods,” he added.

“Gue doesn't understand you,” I said annoyed.

Ardi approached me. “Ok. I think you are really senile. But hopefully you are not senile or pretend to forget about your father's struggle to finance your lecture here. Semester money, book money, pocket money, food needs, and rent a place to live, it's not cheap, right? Surely you can still remember how hard your father slammed bones for the sake of you.”

I grabbed the collar of Kunyuk's shirt. He could have used the situation to mentally attack me.

“Eh sorry again yes, Gas. It turns out I might be getting senile. I forgot that your father is a famous conglomerate. Permana group owners who every day can make money up to billions of rupiah.” He continued to cultivate sweet words adorned with sharp thorns.

Blood boils. However, I saw Mutia open the fence – out of her boarding house. I let go of my grip while slightly pushing the two-faced Kunyuk, the most hypocritical human in the world.

I'm not afraid of Mutia's judgment when I'm in a physical fight with the Kunyuk. I was just lazy to see his face that seemed to blow heartache.

I left, but my shoes seemed to have been infused with nails. Every footing I walked felt draining the pain from the feet to the ends of the hair. Dad, I miss you so much.

I dropped myself on the chair, then lowered my head. While the class was still quiet, I traced the meaning of the brief meeting with Dad earlier.

I have forgotten him. For the desire to feel the sparkle of life, I took off the affection I received. Simple affection, but always succeeds in calming the mind.

My life as Bagas was fun. Anything I want is available in plain sight. But what if all of this suddenly disappears? What if I can't find true happiness with this body? Isn't the path of life full of mystery, and its direction is sometimes unpredictable? Is not the peak of happiness is being able to smile with both parents and family?

Akhhhhh!!!