The Pain Of Regret

Chapter 81. Family perfecter

The POV Joshua

I've seen and heard a video on FYP social media about the origin of a human being. They exist because of two elements. Father and Mother. Can't be denied anymore.

Still not lost to memory when I sat on the bench of the A-level playgroup two years ago. I often do not take part in several football competitions for childhood held because of the absence of a father figure in my life.

Or when I was on playgroup B a year ago. I also could not take part in a mini ball kicking competition at a special moment of education day, because it was mandatory to do with Dad.

And from all of that, I became aware of how important Dad was in life. But that doesn't mean I never asked who my father really was. It's just that the answer from Mama who always sounded blunder made me reluctant to ask again. Free.

I don't know what the problem is, but I'm obviously getting tired of myself. I am often ridiculed by my friends. But I'm quiet. I was also often mentioned by Danar about my inability to show my father figure.

They consider me a loser.

What's my fault, why would you want to know who my father is to be this difficult?

I hate the state of my life because I get too many undue answers. I often run away from school because I can't find peace in that place.

But my curiosity slowly paid off when I overheard my mother and sister talking. And what I heard back then seemed to make my body want to collapse.

Sister Diandra is actually my real mother.

Is this a joke? Or is God granting my prayers and wanting to make things bright faster?

Could be. Coulda.

But it turns out that accepting one reality is not as easy as being said. I don't know why I got so angry because I felt like I was being deceived all this time. Is it because I'm just a kid? Who is my father then?

I even became very angry and reluctant to meet with Sister Diandra. Even my tongue felt stiff when Mama asked me to call Sister Diandra as Mother.

My heart hurts even more after knowing that the man who accidentally delivered me was my real father. What does all this mean?

Why are they so selfish? Why don't they care about me?

I just want a whole family.

I'm upset. Real angry. I took advantage of the opportunity to escape while Mama was busy looking for porters to transport the goods of the people I should have called Mother.

I can't believe I even met Vida's sister. The kind woman I knew by accident when I was a hobby ran away from school.

But even more surprising, not only did Vida's legs catch me sitting crying on a long bench. Unless there's a father behind Sister Vida. I was really surprised, really surprised. But I haven't had the chance to blow it all away, my mother's voice first shocked me.

I'm angry because again Mama looks angry when she meets my father. I finally chose silence. But until the afternoon had even changed the night, my body felt bad at all. My mouth is bitter and my throat hurts when used to swallow.

I am often like this. When I think of something heavy, I often have a fever. But from the panic I heard, Mama said if my fever reached 40 degrees. Even I felt my eyes begin to blur.

I limp and can only obey. But I'm still in my mind, reluctant to open my mouth to Sister Diandra. I was confused what to call him. Why did he get this long because he didn't tell me that my father was alive for a while.

Not long after, everything felt like a dream. I even saw the figure of Dad entering with brother Diandra and the man I recently known as Uncle God. That guy is handsome like Dad. But the man's physique was clearly more burly than Dad's. No doubt, the army must have a physical above average.

I was originally dongkol. Do I have to wait for the new pain they want to come together. Ah, I thought I'd take advantage of this moment to make the two together.

But it turns out that Dad's confession stuck me. It even seemed to pop my eyes at the fact that was actually happening. At a very young age to take things seriously. I was forced to understand, about the obvious impossibility.

" Daughter, you already know what happened between your Mom and Dad. I am so happy and grateful that you still call me Dad. I'm happy about it all!"

My eyes really warmed up when I heard Dad's voice. Did Dad really not want me?

" Dad deserves all this. I'm so sorry, but none of this can be changed. I was the one who had hurt your mother!"

I reflexively let go of the grasp. I'm disappointed in them. It's clear, I still won't be able to have a full family.

" I'll make amends as much as I can and as much as I can. We can still be a family even though your Mom and Dad can't be together!"

" Why?" Why can't. Even if I'm like this, you can't be together?" I asked with a tight chest because I was very upset with all this.

" Joshua!" said Mr. Diandra this time seemed to disagree.

I saw my father close his eyes. I can see how broken he is right now. But in that second, somehow I also desperately wanted to hug Sister Diandra.

" Because God's uncle is the one who can make your mother happy."

I looked straight at the man. The handsome guy who once accompanied me played on the Playground with Diandra's sister. But when I looked at him, I was captivated by the friendly eyes he showed. From the radiance, I could see a powerful ray of protection.

" Daughter, after this you won't be sad anymore. You'll even have two fathers. We can go for a walk like your friends later, hm?" my Dad said.

" Will you forgive me?" ask me directly because all this time I know if Mom really hates Dad.

Mom looked surprised. He was oiling to repeat the question because maybe it was a miracle for him.

" Do you want to forgive me?"

So when Mom nodded and hugged me afterwards, I felt like my body was becoming light. Moreover, when I heard my father thank God Uncle.

Maybe I don't have a perfect family. But I will perfect all these complexities, for the sake of the family.