Silence of a Son-in-law

DSM-4

Mas Ashraf and I just finished a hot romance after one week we didn't. We only had that relationship when Mas Ashraf asked. As an ordinary human being, I have desires, but I am ashamed to ask first. It is not forbidden either. 

Just as usual, if it has completed his desire then Mas Ashraf will immediately sleep or play mobile phone. Not hugging me let alone kissing my forehead. There is no romance and I feel like our relationship is very flat. 

I really wanted us to sleep hugging each other and exchanging stories. Ashraf heard my groaning and all that I felt. But that's just a wish. 

"Mas" I called in doubt. 

Mas Ashraf took his eyes off the phone and stared at me. Just looking at her cute looking gaze had made me doubt. Especially if I say all the things that stifle my feelings. I don't know what Mas Ashraf's response will be. 

"Why? Tell me what you're gonna say before I go to sleep. I'm tired" he said. 

I was a rough mendes*h. He thought I wasn't tired of staying home. Doing exhausting homework and my mother-in-law's attitude often upset me. Perhaps, compared to my tiredness is greater than the tiredness that Mas Ashraf felt. However, I can only keep all of that alone. 

"I want to work, where Emira is in need of a maid, Mas." 

I tell myself to say that. Thank goodness if not, I can't do anything anymore. 

"Make what?" Mas Ashraf's voice had risen by an octave and I even saw him put his phone down quickly. "Have I not given you a living? I work hard just to support you! You want to buy what it is." 

I shook weakly. "I want to help the economy of our family, Mas. After all, there have been no children among us. So that I don't keep saturated at home, Mas." I tried to find the simplest and most reasonable reason. 

"Meat pregnant! I've been wanting to have children, too, but until now you haven't been pregnant!" blames me. 

He did not think that his words were so heartbreaking. She thought I didn't want to get pregnant either. My heart is getting hot and it feels like I want to rent it myself. 

"Maas ...." 

"Better now you sleep! Don't make my body feel tired. Until whenever I won't let you go to work. What will people say when they see you working. He thought I couldn't give you a living!" snapped again. 

I just assented. Discuss this conversation before we argue. Facing Mas Ashraf's indifferent attitude has made me stroke the chest let alone our quarrel which is only because of trivial problems. 

***

Two weeks passed, I no longer asked Mas Ashraf for permission to work. Let me be at home and obey the man's command. I don't want to have a debate let alone a big fight between us. Let me give up to the best I can. To the limit of my patience was at the peak.

After dinner, Mas Ashraf invited me to sit down with my mother as well. He took the money from the brown envelope of his salary. Yes, it is now the beginning of the month and it is time for Mas Ashraf to receive a salary. 

Then, Mas Ashraf gave even more sheets to my mother-in-law. It astonished me. I'd love to protest, but I don't want to do that in front of my mother-in-law. 

Of course, I will be more cornered later. 

I kept the money and immediately bid farewell to the room. Let Mas Ashraf and my mother-in-law chat a lot. I deliberately did not want to listen because I was worried that their words might hurt my feelings. 

Almost an hour passed, Mas Ashraf had just walked into the room. I haven't slept because I'm waiting for him. When he had laid his body beside me, I took a deep breath and exhaled quite hard. 

"You why?" 

It seems like Mas Ashraf knows about my sigh*n rough breathing because I often do this if I am in a bad mood. 

"Mas, why did you give your mother more money?" 

"You don't accept it!" he interrupted my words. In fact, I saw that Mas Ashraf's eyeballs were already enlarged and like they were going out of place.

I'm sure there will soon be a fight between us. It was very desirable to end this conversation, but my heart was still not calm and like something was stuck. I have to say all the burdens that ensnare my heart in order to be a little relieved. 

"I don't want to protest, Mom. But as a wife, I'm more deserving of your money. Especially I'm the one who buys all our needs." 

"You should know, Ira! My mother raised me lovingly. He didn't ask me to pay back everything he did. Now, I give him money that is worth nothing, you protest instead! What kind of wife are you!" 

Closed eyes. Mas Ashraf's words were so loud that they scratched the wound. Stupidly I, as I protested, was still the one who would lose. 

"Mas, if it's like that then let me work. I also want to repay the services of my parents. They have raised me with great difficulty, and I have not been able to repay them. In fact, since I got married I never gave them money" I won't lose. 

"You!" 

Mas Ashraf's finger was pointing right in front of my face. Like I'm gonna poke both my eyes. However, I am not at all afraid of him. Just flinching and looking at the look in his eyes that were filled with flashes of anger.

"Take me home to my parents, Mom." 

Finally, the words came out of my lips unconsciously.