Silence of a Son-in-law

DSM-01

..."Too many things I've struggled with, but you haven't seen them at all. I forced myself to live in a place where I felt uncomfortable. All for your sake, for my sake as a wife. However, you simply cannot understand or be sensitive to my feelings." ...

..._Fahira Maharani_'s...

...****************...

"Don't I tell you! I am an only child and cannot leave this house even though I am married! You should have known that. What's the trouble? You're married to me You should be nice to my mom!" 

I could only duck when Mas Ashraf, my husband, returned to answer my question in a thunderous voice as if it was about to break my eardrum. 

This is not our first fight. After two years of household building, I, who began to feel uncomfortable because I lived in the same roof with my in-laws, always tried to speak softly to Mas Ashraf. Asking to build an independent household, but what I found was always like this. 

The violent impact that was able to shake my heart even made my heart feel like it was going to explode and crumble. 

The man who became my bedmate two years ago, left by slamming the door and I could only cry on the edge of the bed. Merem*s the tip of the shirt I wear to channel the sense of lara that mounts in the soul. 

Be ill. 

Yeah, it hurts so much. I, who insisted on staying for my time as a wife, felt no respect at all. All this time I tried to stay quiet and live it all. 

While waiting for quite a while there was no sign of Mas Ashraf returning to the room, I chose to go up to the bed. Pull the blanket up to the chest. I let the clear hairs flow from every corner of my eyes without intending to wipe them. 

Aren't tears a sign of pain when the mouth can't talk anymore to say lara? 

When my cry had not yet subsided, I heard the door being knocked from the outside. I thought it was Mas Ashraf, but it was not my husband but Sumarni's mother, my mother-in-law. When I heard the approaching footsteps, I pulled the blanket over my entire body and only part of my hair was visible. 

I don't want my mother-in-law to know that I'm crying. Let him think I'm asleep. That's how I thought. 

"Basic kebo!" lirih. But I can still hear it well. "The husband goes to work, instead of getting up and helping him sleep. Pantes has no children yet." 

I can only close my eyes. Letting the clear circle flow more when hearing the mother's words that feel painful. It felt like it was raining down on my heart and channeling the pain that left me almost helpless. 

After I heard the door close tightly, I immediately opened the blanket. Staring pushyly towards the room sky. My mind floated. Imagine the time before marriage and my parents always overflowed me with an outpouring of affection. 

***

After my fight with Mas Ashraf this morning, I completely lost my spirit. The mood of my heart was completely deteriorated to the point of not wanting to do anything other than tambourine and lying down. In fact, even when playing mobile phone I just scroll the flat object, without knowing what my purpose is.

Prangs! 

I rushed out of the room when I heard the sound of something falling. Heading into the kitchen and I could only sigh deeply when a pot was already lying next to the stove. The water spilled everywhere. 

I hurriedly took the pot and took the mop to clean it. 

"Next time be careful, ma'am. If you can't let me do it later. After all, Mas Ashraf also returned home in an hour," I said slowly. Afraid of offending my mother-in-law. 

"What did you say!" sniff the woman. "You were just in the room like a brooding chicken. Did you know Ashraf came home early today?" 

I nodded weakly because I knew nothing. Ashraf didn't even send me a single message. 

"This why?" 

I was shocked when I heard my husband's voice. I turned around and saw the man standing in the doorway. "You're home, Mom?" 

"You see I'm here, that means I'm home. This is why there's a pot downstairs and the floor is so slippery?" Mas Ashraf's question demands an answer. He even looked at me very sharply as if he was going to skin me alive. 

Unfortunately again, my tongue was suddenly confused to be unable to give any answer. 

"I'm sorry, Shraf. Mom told Ira you came home early today, but she didn't believe it. So, the mother who heated the water for you took a bath and the mother was forced to drop it because it wasn't strong," the scene was full of lies. It puts me in a cornered position. 

"I-I'm sorry, Mom." 

Again I could only sit down and be in the weakest position. I was unable to fight even though I knew, I was not in the wrong position.