Reaching the Miss (Daddy)

51

Before undergoing the bone marrow transplant process, Amara has undergone a series of tests and procedures to evaluate general health so that the transplant can be done. Given Amara's weakened condition, the evaluation took up to two weeks.

And this two weeks seemed to be going so slowly for me, especially considering how Amara underwent chemotherapy that felt so excruciating. Seeing my baby in pain, it was as if I felt what Ara was feeling. It was like electricity was directly channeled into every blood stream and made my cells instantly freeze.

The pain is increasingly becoming when seeing Ara's hair that is getting thinner because of loss due to chemotherapy.

Fortunately, some time ago, my friends, Sasa and Anita's parents, and Aldika came to visit. Even Rudito's grandfather and Nimas' grandmother would not lose their visit to us just to encourage me and Amara. They came and went to visit Ara to give us support and do'a that made my sense of tightness slightly reduced.

There is nothing scariest except tomorrow for me. Because Amara will struggle to live longer with stem cells from Tama mas

Stem cells derived from the spinal cord of the daddy itself that the medical team has decided and taken based on the situation Amara and mas Tama.

"What are you thinking?" ask me Tama. Right now, I am sleeping on his lap. I really couldn't close my eyes when it was eleven o'clock in the evening.

"I can't sleep" I replied blankly. "I was thinking Amara will she be healed?"

"Why be pessimistic like this, hmm?"

"I don't know, I'm afraid the operation will fail"

Mas Tama asked me to rise from my fall and lead me to the bed.

"Sleep! it's late, I'm with you"

I lay down beside Tama's mas, then she pulled me up until my body docked to her.

"Don't make yourself tired, we should look strong in front of Ara tomorrow, now close your eyes!"

One hand I made a pillow while the other hand patted my upper arm.

This is the second time we have slept in one bed,

There was nothing we did on the bed, except just cuddling and occasionally kissing.

"Na" call mas Tama after we both have no voice.

"Hm"

"Am I wrong to talk about the continuation of our relationship?"

"What do you want to talk about?"

"There's something we need to be clear about, right? do you mind if we talk about this now?"

"No" My heart was short.

Mas Tama took a breath for a moment before then said again.

"We're still husband and wife, what do you think?"

"I_"

"Nobody can replace you in my heart Na" she cut him off quickly. "Don't you refer me?"

I lifted my head slightly looking for Netra mas Tama, trying to dive into his eyes to ascertain the solemnity of his words.

"Mother?"

"Why still think about my mom? there is Amara in our midst, do you have the heart of your own Son? doesn't Amara want her daddy mommy to live together?"

Mas Tama grabbed me back to land my head on his arm. "I still love you, we are clear now so that tomorrow when accompanying our child, the condition of our relationship is better" said mas Tama, I do not know what his expression was like when he said that.

"You still love me, don't you?"

Silence, it took me a long time to respond to Tama's questions.

"Well, will we be together again? we start over with Amara?"

"I still love you, too, but I want us to remarry, how?"

"We are still legally and religiously legitimate, why should we marry?"

"We separated long enough, I want to mas ngapin ijab qobul repeated, let there is no awkward feeling anymore between us. Just ijab qobul" concluded me slightly pressing the tone of my voice. "We do not need to register a marriage because in our state records are still valid"

"Ok, later after Amara's business is done, we rearrange the plan"

"Hm"

"Deal yeah, we agreed we'd live together again?"

"Yes"

"Then let's go to sleep" Invite Mas Tama after seeing me at a glance. "We forget our past, we think about Amara's future together, we educate her to greatness, and give her a lot of affection for her"

I hope our decision to return to living together is not wrong. Hopefully with Amara, your hard heart will soften over time. It's easy for my daughter to take her heart, because Amara loves her so much. The boy, not the slightest bit of knowledge about the ugliness of Rania on her mommy. It doesn't matter if Rania's whole life continues to hate me as long as she loves Amara, that's more than enough.

"Sleep, tomorrow morning we must appear with a fresh and happy face, so that Ara is happy and excited to undergo surgery"

"Hmm, good night" I said, hugging.

"Good Night, I love you Na"

"I love you too mas"

****

In the morning, after washing Amara's body, two sisters entered our ward. They checked Amara's condition and informed him that the operation would be carried out at nine. A team of transplant experts and oncologists are preparing in the operating room.

I don't know, my mind is really transverse everywhere, even like traveling to the world of between braids that make my brain filled with various prejudices.

My palms are very cold, my body feels weak as well as boneless.

Many times mas Tama gave me a gentle rub on my shoulder and held my hand tightly. But that grip did not necessarily reduce the nervousness and fear that plagued my heart since last night.

Even though I myself have tried to neutralize all the flavors that enter my body.

"Ara scared?"

"There is no daddy with mommy" he said with a smile. "There's an oppa same oma too, right mom?"

"So soon come son, oma same opa again in the taxi want to come here" Mas Tama replied to me.

Father and mother had indeed since dawn informed mas Tama that the plane they would ride would take off at five in the morning and reach Spore at around seven.

At this time, they again reported if they were in the taxi and about thirty minutes more would arrive.

"Ara is happy to accompany daddy same mommy, same opa oma too. It's just a little sad"

"Ara sad?" sambarku hurry.

"Grandan is not Nemenin Ara"

"So, I've been talking on the phone, right, if the grandfather is friends from home, the grandfather prays at home for Ara"

"Yes, eat it Ara sad a little bit"

"Don't be sad dong, later if Ara recovers, daddy will take Ara, mommy, opa, oma and grandpa for a walk"

"Seriously dad?"

"Seriously dong, daddy can't lie about this beautiful daddy's daughter"

I was just a listener, letting Mas Tama and Amara talk.

"We can go to Korea? Ara peekin show the nice places there to daddy same opa oma"

"It can be so dear, the important thing Ara healed first yes"

"Yes" Ara blinked and then smiled faintly. "Last night Ara had a dream to meet Grandma"

Hearing Ara's words, instantly my heart went numb not knowing the rules. I immediately focused my eyes on Amara's thin, unsecubby face a few months ago.

"What dream, son?" my question is full of search. I hope Amara's dream is no longer taken away by mother.

"Ara dreams Grandma lives alone Ara, grandmother's way far away, called but not looking back"

"Continue?" I'm just impatient.

"Keep daddy call Ara home"

"Ara want?" I was afraid again.

Mas Tama looked at me full of wonder, complete with his forehead that formed a fold.

"Ara asked daddy to follow grandma, Ara asked daddy to find grandma, but grandma had gone all the way, so Ara went home with daddy"

After hearing Ara's words, I looked up at Tama who was standing beside my left.

Our pair of eyes met, we both swallowed the saliva simultaneously.

"What does it mean?"

"You why is it always parno when it comes to dreams? The dream was just a sleeping flower, don't be too thought of" Tama rubbed the top of my head.

"Our romance is a strong girl, although this operation has risks, but we have to be sure, Amara will be fine, she will not leave us, will Ara?"

I turned my face towards Amara, looking as if she was nodding slowly with a smile.

"Mommy don't be afraid, Ara must be healed really, Ara will not be impatient to stay with daddy, messing with daddy, in between schools with daddy, and if allowed, in, Ara Peng joins daddy's work to the office"

"Assalamualaikum" Suddenly I heard the voice of greeting from Father.

"Waalaikumsalam" we answered compactly. I stood up to greet my father and mother.

"Oppa?" said Ara girang, then immediately kissed the back of the hands of father and mother as soon as they reached the side of the bed Amara

Mommy still displays her sour face in front of Ara, but a child as small as Ara knows what, I am the one who feels the stare of dislike, but I do not care, the important thing now there is a Tama mas who accompanies me, but I do not care, at least I'm not alone.

Father must have advised mother and hopefully soon, mother will give sincere affection to my little girl. With the decision of the father who no longer allows the mother to go to work, it means that she and Ara will have a lot of time at home, I hope with Ara's innocence, I hope, mother will melt and love him wholeheartedly.

It's just me you hate bun, Amara don't.

"What time is Tama's operation?" The question from my father broke my focus.

"Suster said at nine o'clock well, there'll be a nurse who picks us up here"

Dad nodded his head in response to the response from Mas Tama.

"Ara could be, oppa's granddaughter would be smart"

"It could be opa, Ara pep quickly healed and went home to a big daddy. Ara pep lives same daddy same mommy, same opa and omma"

"If so, let us pray, opa will lead his prayer, so that Ara's affairs are given smoothness by Allah Ta'Alla"

"Come opa" replied Ara girang.

"Bissmilbornrahmaanirrahim" Father began reciting a prayer, we compactly raised our hands to accept his prayer.

"Yes hayyu ya qayyumu birahmatika astaghitsu, ashlih li sya'ni kullahu wala takilni ila nafsi tharfata 'ainin abadan.

O Lord Almighty, O Lord of the Alone, need not everything, with Your grace I ask for help, correct all my affairs and do not be handed over to me even a blink of an eye without receiving help from You forever."

"Robbisyroh lii shodrii, wa yassir lii amrii, wahlul 'uqdatam mil lisaaniii, yafqohu qoulii"

"O my Lord, stretch out my bosom, and ease my affairs for me, and remove the rigidity of my tongue, that they may understand my words"

"Aamiin, yes Rabbal'alamin"

Seriate