Playground

59

You ask me if I am jealous of the attention and affection that I have given to Sita? The answer is I am jealous, I am envious.

I am an ordinary human being who does not escape from all human vices, human is not.

I was jealous, I felt the love he used to say was no longer there for me. My heart felt empty and lacking. Lack of affection, lack of attention there are still many feelings of lack that I feel.

I envy why God has not given me the opportunity to get pregnant and have children from my own womb. Destiny ? This is the destiny I have to accept and live. Which in the end I must declare, I must leave everything to the power of the Khaliq.

If you ask why not just sue for divorce if you feel you are unable to mix. The answer is in process. Yes, two days ago I secretly filed a lawsuit against a religious court with the help of one of my friends, a lawyer named Ghandi Alwali.

In that lawsuit I also fought for hito custody, I didn't want the kid stuck around anymore, I wanted him to grow up how he should without having to drift around here and there. Besides that reason also because I already love him and I want to continue with him to accompany each other in navigating this harsh ocean of life.

I was sick when I had to give up and retreat, but I thought it was for the good especially for my sake. I want to be selfish this time. Stepping without thinking about the happiness of others. I am sure that those who truly love me will support the decisions I make, they will wisely respond to the steps I will take.

My family and my two in-laws already know about the lawsuit I filed. They had even suggested it long before I thought about it but I was the one who always put off, because I was still worried.

He who used to fight for me so much, did various ways to take my heart with ease he also hurt. Scratching one after another incisions and wounds .

How can everything that looks fine be like this? Because I always covered everything, even though our family finally knew from some people who happened to know that we were in trouble.

In addition to Hito's presence which surprised me and his affair with Sita there was something else that made us fight before that. It happened a long time ago, maybe a few months before his affair with Sita was discovered.

Mas dzaky was in Jakarta at the time, an unknown number sent me an sacrilegious video, you know who the player is? My husband, he's a dzaky mas and a sexy woman I don't know her identity.

I was trying to hold back my anger, trying to forgive and I thought she was just getting bored of me for a moment, especially I wasn't pregnant yet. But I don't expect him to repeat the affair again this time caught directly by my mother-in-law and me.

I have tried to forgive and try to improve and even allow polygamy but whatever the power I am a narrow-hearted ordinary human being, I give up I can no longer survive. I'm gonna let go, why should I? Because Sita can't let me give up considering she's containing the seeds that are sowing.

How could I let an innocent child lose his father, I'm not that selfish.

The plan is I will also return the caffe mes rei beri, but mama and papa refused . Because of that refusal I created a new account to save income from the caffe, I will donate it to the more needy every month.

And today I came to those five caffe . First I went to the smansa caffe, to meet A Reza. I want to increase his responsibility to take care of hits caffe also located near one of the private universities located also not far with smansa caffe.

"A Reza." Sapaku when I just got to the smansa caffe.

"Hi, how are you cis?"

"Good A."

"You want to check the report?"

"Not only that, I want to ask for help."

"Can you what?" He asked a little joking.

"God willing if I can cis."

"Please take care of Hits caffe also yes A,please !!"

" Where are you going?"

"Where A is going, but I'm going to split the time." He kept looking at me questioningly. I looked down and answered a question he might ask.

"Have you decided to divorce with dzaky?" Tanya Reza was answered with a nod of the head by the cyst.

"Alright I'll help you take care of hits and smansa."

"Thank you A, thank you very much."

"Either. May the decision you make make you happy one day."

"Amin, doain alone is best for me."

"Surely."

"Once again thank you A, the report I take home yes A, tomorrow I anter again, I want to go around nih keep fetching Hito."

"Okay cis, take it, do it at home. Be careful, if you need help call me."

"Okay A, thank you, if you'll excuse me. Oh yes starting next month transfer to a new account yes, later I send via wa account number."

"OK, that's. Why change the cis?"

"Because I'm going to donate the caffe's income to someone who needs an A."

"What are your needs then?"

"My life is just as expensive as my need A."

"Oh okay, I'm more amazed with you cis, I hope you are happy."

"Hehehe, I'm going ya A."

"OK careful."

"👌."