My Choice of Woman

Episode 3

“Constrate your heart Dear,” said Mother in a choked voice.

Farah still could not digest Mother's words. Horrible shadows about papa and mama spring to mind. Farah strengthened her heart, dismissing all those possibilities. Arriving at the intended room, Farah's cry broke out. Looked at Mama who was weak in that bed. Many alternating hoses stick to the body of Mama.

Mother said, Mama and Papa had an accident after coming home from Aunt Sarah's house. Farah cried. Trying to scream for papa. But Mommy prevents and hugs Farah tightly. Tell me if Papa Farah died in the accident. Only Mama can still be saved and still not aware until now.

“Papaa! Why did Papa leave Farah,” cries Farah, Mommy joined in crying to hear the whimper. Mother hugged Farah tightly.

Suddenly, Mama woke up. The sound of the tool was loud. Farah tried to see my mom.

“Fa-rah. Ma-ma su-dah ti-dak. Ma-ma i-ngin i-kut Pa-pa. Fa-rah i-kut Bu-nda yes. Lia ti-tip my son,” Mama's voice stammered.

Mother who realized immediately called the doctor. Farah stepped back so as not to disturb the doctors and nurses to check the condition of the mother. The doctor tried very hard. As the doctor looked at Mommy, the doctor shook his head, a sign that he had handed over to God. Mother immediately approached the body of the mother whispering the shahadah.

Farah's eyes widened, she got out of control, roared and cried. Farah got up to grab my mom's body. He cursed this self. Unbelievingly.

I should have been able to prevent mom and dad from leaving!

Inner Farah shouted.

Suddenly everything seems dark. Darkened. And silent.

***

Farah opened her eyes, feeling familiar looking at the ceiling of this room. Looking around, it's no mistake this is Farah's room. He remembers what happened. Farah's parents are gone. He came out to see a house full of mourners.

Farah cried to approach the bodies of Papa and Mama who had been wrapped in a kaffan cloth. Mother who saw it immediately prevented and calmed Farah.

Farah insists on going to the cemetery where Papa and Mama are buried.

“Farah can come, but Farah must promise not to cry,” said Mother.

Farah just nodded. It turned out that his two best friends, Jihan and Balqis were among these mourners. Jihan and Balqis accompany and strengthen Farah to persevere through this destiny. Finally, Mama and Papa's bodies were sent to the cemetery.

Their bodies were landfilled and their tombs were sprinkled with flowers. Although Farah had promised not to cry at the funeral, still this sadness could not be dammed. Farah cried again. I can't believe he's alone today.

“Ma, B. Farah love you guys. Now Farah is alone,” cries Farah in the middle of her papa mama complacency. A cry that makes pain for those who hear it. Suddenly it rained. As promised rain. Hiding the tears that come out.

The mourners scatter in search of a place to shelter. Some have brought umbrellas including mother. Mother came and slightly dragged Farah to come home. The rain is falling more and more often.

At home, Farah sat on the sofa, her clothes wet. Mother took warm water to clean the hands and feet of Farah who was dirty because of the wet soil of the grave.

“Farah has eaten?”

There's no answer.

“Delay make food yes for Farah?” say Mother again.

“Farah where to go?” prevent Mother.

“Ke room, change clothes.”

Farah walked down to the room. It felt like he was just chatting with my mom this morning. Breakfast together discussing what majors will be when in college. Farah looked at the things that were done earlier. There was no intention of going back to him.

After changing clothes, Farah looked at the ceiling of the room. He felt very lost and felt today was the longest and worst day.

Farah wanted to cry out loud, defying this fate. Shouting to God asking if mom and dad could come back for even a minute? No. gabe. Farah did not do it, the voice always stopped in the throat. He was too tired to cry again, even though a few drops of tears were seeping out. It feels warm to make his eyes moist.

The sound of knocking on the door blew away the imagination that Farah saw in the sky of her room. Mother went into Farah's room carrying a warm soup. It smelled delicious, but Farah was not feeling well. He felt emptiness in this heart and body.

“Download soup. Mumpung is still warm to eat yes dear,” said Mother.

Farah wakes up, sitting on the bed. When Mother fed Farah, She shook her head in a sign of rejection.Mother only smiled faintly.

“Mother knows, Farah lost mama, lost papa. Not only Farah who feels lost, Mother also feels the loss of a friend that Mother has considered like her own brother. Mommy knows this hurts Farah, but Farah must be steadfast, pray for the best for mama and papa,” said Mommy gently full of patience.

Hearing Mother's words, Farah's tears seeped again, she realized that even though rejecting all this fate was useless. Mother hugged Farah, letting Farah cry in her arms.

Turns out Mommy is good like Mama.

“Now Farah is the responsibility of Mother, mama Farah entrust you to Mother. Now Farah eats yes, though little Farah has to eat.”

Farah nodded, Mother is right, before mama died, mama said to follow Mommy.

I will follow your mother's request

***

It's been a few days since my mom and dad died. Farah still hasn't let them go. Mother had to go home, actually mother wanted Farah to come to stay in her house, but Farah refused, she insisted stay in this house. A house full of memories with mom and dad. Mother agreed to Farah's request and good Mother sent a household assistant named Mbak Jum to accompany and meet all Farah's needs.

At first Farah also rejected the goodwill of the mother because she did not need a housekeeper. But mother convinced Farah to accept this goodwill, Mother who bears all the costs Mbak Jum.

Occasionally Jihan and Balqis stopped by the house to visit Farah, sometimes Balqis brought food cooked by her uminya. But still the taste of food as good as anything feels bland when feeling lost.

Farah once tried to eat the dishes served by Mbak Jum so the cuisine is delicious. When he smelled it but remembering mom and dad, he cried. Farah ate while crying. This chest tightness, it felt hollow.

Sometimes Farah went into the room of mama and papa, he opened their closet, still the same, the smell was still the same has not changed. Farah took the clothes of mama and inhaled the aroma, it felt like mama was still there, she hugged the clothes while laying on the bed.

Again these tears flowed, Farah was not completely sincere, still very heavy. He did it like that until he fell asleep. Loss, emptiness, loneliness is crowded, eyes are too tired to shed tears.

The prayer that Farah spoke in one time was more than able to change God's destiny for even a second. Farah's body collapsed, unable to feel everything.

Darkened.