MOON IN PESANTREN
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...5 Chapter to Epilogue. Happy Reading 💜💜...
I shook my head slowly. “Neventless. I don't want to confess your feelings to me. By the way, we're here to cross the road. We'll split up here, yeah, I'll go first. Assalamualaikum.”
Andra was fixated a few seconds after that just answered my greetings.
I walk alone with my mind glaring far away. Thinking about my future. What about my college, my job later, and other things including about a mate.
Sometimes the worry of the future must perch in everyone's mind. And the reason I chose not to hear Andra's confession is because I don't think it's any good. For me, now is not the time to be busy looking for someone who loves but is busy improving.
In short, like, I know that if Andra doesn't like me, maybe I'll be sad. And if it turns out that Andra likes me, then what? Should I wait for him to come home from Turkey? Getting married is too early for us. We need to focus on continuing education.
Turku. Andra is going to college in Turkey. If I had known that we had the same feelings, all I could have done was wait until he returned to the Fatherland. That too if you are a fool. If not, maybe my waiting is just a waste. So, I think it is better now that we improve each other.
As soon as I arrived in front of the room, I intended to open the door. However, it was shocked because there was a loud voice from within. “Assalamualaikum,” I said as I entered the room.
“Waallaikumsalam,” reply all rooms in unison. A lot of it, it looks like 10 people complete.
“Cell, Hunt, Cell. Taro used to have his flip flops on the shelf. Here want to hear something?” syilla said heboh.
“Tau nih, Long time back home. Missing your news,” said Najwa.
“What's up, anyway?” ask me after putting sandals on the shelf and then sit down to join them.
“ZAHRA HAS NERIMA APPLICATION USTADZ ZIDAN!!”
“Uuuuu ..” cried Iffah who was greeted by a standing ovation from the others.
I gawk. “Eh, seriously? Nyesel deh had not been flirting home so missed the news. Then this news can be spread dong?” many enthusiast.
“Bby dong. Tomorrow directly rame nih one pesantren,” Syilla replied until Zahra's face was reddened with shame mixed happily.
Zahra is very good, he does not want others to know that he was proposed by Ustadz Zidan unless he is sure to accept Ustadz Zidan's invitation to marry. Because Zahra did not want Ustadz Zidan to be the subject of people's speech and felt embarrassed because his proposal was rejected. Enough of his best friend and us as roommates only know. He kept as good a name as he could and Ustadz Zidan. But now, this good news may soon spread throughout the pesantren.
“Terus Ustadz Zidan sleeps at his house abis lebaran, Ra?” my many.
Zahra nodded softly with a face blushed in shame, dimples beautifying her smile. “Iya. Do’ain, yes hopefully smoothly.”
“Aamiin Yes Rabbal Alamin ..” All simultaneously guarantee.
“Although our home is far away, you can come to my wedding later?” zahra asked with a pleading face.
“Quiet aja, Ra. God willing, we must work even far too.”
“Iya, Ra. God willing I flew between islands to come to your important event. Follow this happy news. Congratulations yes,” said Anninda whose home is outside Java Island.
Syilla shifted her body and approached Zahra. “Can it not, Ra?”
Zahra nodded. “By.”
“Your medical lecture is advanced, right?”
“God willing I should go to medical school. It makes me an important education. Ustadz Zidan also ngizinin I went to college, even he said he would always support me until I could be a doctor. He will soon pass S2 Biology, can teach me while helping me to do the tasks later,” replied Zahra with a smile that has not disappeared from her smooth face.
“Mashaallah. Coolly. Equally pinter.”
“That's a big meal, Ra. Your matching pair.”
“Barakaallah fiikum, Zahra.”
Zahra stretched out her arms to invite us all to cuddle. “Still a lot of everything.”
...***...
I stood in front of the room and intended to get some fresh air while waiting for the breaking of the fast. Suddenly my eyes saw the figure of Harsa sitting on the corridor chair while waving her hands towards me. I'm not huffing because I think the wave was shown to the person behind me.
“Seli! Pretending not to see you? Here!”
I stopped my footsteps and turned towards him. “Call me? Why?”
He did not answer, only gestured to approach her.
With a lazy step, I approached this man with the predicate of Johan. “Apaan?” my question was flat after standing not far from him.
“Mau vent. The news of Zahra being proposed to Ustadz Zidan made me smile but there is sadness too.”
“Sad why? Oh, or maybe you really like Zahra, huh? Kasian," I said, ending the ruckus of mocking him.
“Not.” Harsa let out a slightly contrived tired breath. “After the news spread in the class adek, every time I meet them, I must be glued to ‘Sad Boy’. They thought I was married to Zahra. But I was with Zahra since then there was no relationship. They took on DM on instagram call me ‘Sad Boy’ all over again.”
I held back a laugh listening to Harsa's curses. “Udah belom confided? If so, I want to go to.”
“In fact I also like to finally Zahra realized who the man she really likes. He loved Ustadz Zidan from a long time ago but he never realized. He is too focused on his past,” said Harsa seriously, the joking expression on Harsa's face was fading.
“Tau from where?” many wonder. “You already know, Sa, if Zahra likes you.”
Harsa got up from her chair and stood beside me. “Ustadz Zidan taught here from our class 7 and at that time Ustadz Zidan was still in college semester 1. Because the pesantren again need teachers, Ustadz Zidan as a pesantren alumni is asked to help teach here. At that time, he was the guide tahfidz and biology for students who participated in the race representing pesantren. You know Zahra is often chosen for the race representative because he is johan in the force? Well, every time Ustadz guided Zidan, Zahra always excited a story to me about Ustadz Zidan, I happened to be the same Zahra Biology guidance on the same day. And since then I am sure that Zahra likes Ustadz Zidan.”
I frowned, looking at Harsa with a probing look. “You sure? Can aja Zahra was just admiring Ustadz Zidan because he pinter, understand Ustadz Zidan emang johan in the previous generation. Where is white, tall, saucy anyway.”
This guy with the IPA johan next to me folded his arms around his chest and sighed. “Sorot Zahra's eyes are different if to Ustadz Zidan, your time as a classmate and roommate is not aware anyway? Oh yes, his best friend Zahra also used to tell me that he also thinks the same but Zahra always argue and say that he still likes the same man he saw when registering pesantren.”
“The men that Zahra saw the registration time of the pesantren, that's you, right? So, you mean Zahra who has liked you for a long time makes her not realize that she has actually moved her heart and likes other men? And the other guy was Ustadz Zidan?”
Harsa nodded confidently. “I think so. I've read novels and the main character is too focused on someone he likes first rather than someone in front of him, who may be better than his past. He is trapped by his past.”
I tapped my finger on my chin, trying to think about what Harsa was saying. “Because, we need to see what's ahead. Not keep sinking in the past.”
“Keep why are you still stuck by the past?”
"Huh?" I reflexively turned my head towards Harsa, looking into her eyes which were also looking at me. The question he asked was right on target. I felt that Harsa was offending me who was still stuck feeling in the past with Andra. I immediately turned my eyes elsewhere, closed my lips tightly, not knowing how to respond.
“Seli,” call him after we've been silent for quite a while.
“Ya?”
Harsa cleared her throat and turned her body to face me. “Tomorrow we go home from the pesantren and do not come back again. Maybe back again but our status is no longer santri. The spirit of college, our struggle is still long. I don't know who you are, nor do I know who I am. I just hope one day you can find the right man, the man who can make you feel special, the man who can glorify you, a man who can bring you closer to God. Maybe the man is not me, but may he be the best for you.”
I nodded slowly to say his words.
Harsa who was wearing this white shirt laughed a little and continued her sentence. “It turns out I don't know myself. From the beginning I knew that you like Andra and maybe Andra the same. But, with confidence in himself I revealed that to you. Andra was my own friend. Sorry, Cell. Sorry I like you.” Harsa was silent for a moment then asked, “Where? Don't you know how Andra felt like you all this time?”
I looked down inside, not answering. Just staring at my feet. Repeatedly slit the saliva in every sentence that Harsa uttered, trying to stay calm even though my eyes were ready to shed tears since then. I don't know why it feels like Harsa's words hit my heart.
“Sel, if one day we accidentally meet, you do not avoid yes. We can greet each other as we should. But, God willing I will try to get rid of my feelings to you.” Harsa exhaled slowly. “It seems like there is nothing we need to talk about anymore, yes, if so I first. Do not forget to get ready to go to the restaurant, break the fast again. Assalamualaikum.”
Harsa immediately left without waiting for a greeting from me. I looked at his back which was getting further away. “Waallaikumsalam, Harsa.”
...***...
