Lightly Longing

Request Divorce

Satria brought my body to sit on the living room sofa. He was so attentive and attentive to me. Mr. Arbi also landed his ass right in front of me.

His legs were open as wide as his shoulders, his hands were above his thighs and interlocked. Satria prepared a drink in the kitchen. Then come back with a tray of two cups of tea as well as bread.

"Are you okay, Mom?"

I nodded weakly, Satria sat beside me. He grabbed my shoulder, I glanced at his fingers that were already perched there.

"Thank God. I was worried about Mom."

"Alhamdulillah, my wife is fine, sir."

Satria took a piece of bread, and then fed it to me. I nodded, not wanting to eat anything. In fact, to swallow water I was reluctant.

"Ta, please. Eat this, huh?" he said with a clear face. I was as strong as I could resist, but it wasn't good to expose household problems in front of people. Although, now our situation is being ruined with each other.

I took a piece of bread, and ate it a piece. Satria rubbed my head gently. It is not uncommon for him to kiss my hair at a glance.

"I love you more, Ta," he said not hesitate in front of Mr. Arbi. I glared at his strange attitude, glaring in disbelief. Mr. Arbi can be seen smiling at the tip of his lips.

Maybe in his heart, Satria too appeared to be playing.

"Please drink, sir. Until I forget," said Satria who still continues to hold my finger.

"I heard, Mom got fired from school. Is that true, Mom?"

I lowered my head, enduring the turmoil of feeling in my chest in light of yesterday's afternoon. Slowly I lifted my face.

Taking a deep breath and saying, "Yes, sir."

"What's? You fired?" ask Satria in shock. He was seen shuffling his head trying to find answers from me. However, my mouth was locked tightly. He's no longer my family who should know the details of my life.

"So, what's your next plan?"

"I don't know yet, sir."

"Ananta will focus on taking care of the house, sir. I think I can still afford Ananta's life."

Mr. Arbi sipped his drink, then nodded. He patted both his hands, I don't know what he meant.

"All right, then excuse me. I hope it heals soon, Mom."

"Yes." Yeah."

"Thank you, sir, for visiting my wife."

After Mr. Arbi, I rushed into the room. Leaving Satria there who was still busy cleaning the glass used to drink Mr. Arbi.

I lay back to my usual sleeping position Satria, even though she was not there yet. The sound of the door creaking, the clattering of his steps was heard coming in. He swept my shoulders gently, his hands gently rubbing my head shoots.

"Ananta, give me a chance. I'll do you better" he said, now with his hands around my waist.

I just kept quiet, there was no more love for her. The desire to be with him has also disappeared brought droplets of water that spilled in the bathroom earlier.

I can feel her breath on my neck. I moved to avoid the touch and action that made me careless.

Aware of my refusal, Satria kissed my temple. Then I turned away, I looked for a moment. He slept in the corner of the bed that was also on my back.

"The pain you're hurting is too deep. Sorry, tomorrow I'll take care of the divorce suit," I said in my heart.

**

The morning had come, Satria was no longer beside me. I got up and took off the infusion. Throw it rough, slightly bloody on the back of my hand.

I took a quick step to court. While crossing the dining table, I saw porridge in the bowl and a letter there.

"I left early, yeah. Don't forget the breakfast. The key I brought on intentionally."

I threw away whatever was on the table. Frustrating. I knocked myself down on the floor, crying hysterically like crazy. I'm in prison in this house.

The house we bought together became a cage for me. I banged at the door for help. I wish someone would pass by.

I screamed for a long time, but no one came to help. Until my body droops, eyes drip.

I cursed myself, crying without stopping. The items Tama gave me broke and burned them on the carpet.

Smoke billows, even if I die I don't care. Instead of having to live with a man full of theatrics.

I myself coughed for the smoke I caused. I hugged my knees, drowned my face there.

The door knob sounded rotated. Satria immediately ran to fetch water to extinguish the fire that was not so big.

The wet cloth he also threw on the carpet that had been partially charred. I pulled the corner of my lips, saw it in the fog.

After extinguishing, his attention turned towards me who was still staring fixedly at my actions earlier. He approached, crouching in front of me. Pull this slender body, and hold it tightly.

"Are you okay?"

He kissed the tip of my head, this heart tasteless. His good treatment is now meaningless.

"I want a divorce, Bang."

Satria let go of her embrace, she held both of my shoulders. Staring at me pushy, clear fur slowly dripped down the cheeks.

Satria pulled my neck and brought my head to link to her head. He seemed to close his eyes for a moment, exhaling a long breath.

"Are you going to be happy if we get divorced?"

I just shut up and bowed. I'm not sure about it myself, but the longer I live with it, the more guilt it spreads to make my chest tight.

"I'm not ready to see you suffer. Who are you going to lean with? Think again, Ta. I promise, I'll be even better" he said, squeezing my hand gently and placing it in front of his chest.

The leafan is still the same as before. When we first started to love. The difference is, in my heart there is no longer a sigh that thrills my heart.

"Ta, I love you."

I bowed in, the covenant before God must be broken because of infidelity. But, not divorce is also allowed if the household is unhappy.

"Ta, give me a month to make up for everything. I know, you're just filling the emptiness of my heart because of my attitude. Please, Ta."

I got up, walked back to my room. My gaze was blank, leaving the silent Satria to peek. My wrist was held by Satria as she was about to step inside.

"Ta, don't do anything crazy again."

I was still silent, like a body without life. This marriage is falling apart. Like a mirror that has been broken, even though it is glued back the result will not be perfect as in the beginning.

**

The days passed, the divorce lawsuit I did not let go. True indeed, Satria became transformed. Not as cold as before.

He was warmer, prioritizing me, also devoting all his time and energy just to make me happy. But, it still felt that it was unable to come to the surface.

Right now, Satria is taking me for a walk in the flower garden. I was wearing a nude casual dress, I got a haircut, a sling bag was already on my shoulder.

We stopped at a brown wooden fence around a staircase overgrown with flowers of various colors. I stared straight ahead with such a beautiful view of the lake.

Satria hugged my side of the body from behind. He put his chin on my shoulder. I remained silent not responding to her sweet treatment.

"Ta, thank you for giving me that chance. I wish we were old together."

"Have you ever asked me how my heart is now?"