Husband, If Your Father Is On Your Mother, Your Sins Are On Me

Episode 26's

"The one thing I never imagined when I first set foot in this house was, I was going to have a baby here. Without parents, without relatives. Only rely on yourself and your husband. Lean each other and strengthen each other." - Neng Rere

***

I learned a lot. Learning to be a mother. Learning to be a new person. A person who has full responsibility for a child.

Being a mother is a natural instinct for a woman. But, being responsible for a child in other words taking care, educating, teaching, and protecting requires a learning process that is not easy. Sometimes I almost run out of patience when my sleep is disturbed, or almost explodes when this body has tired but can not rest.

It's not just me learning. Yandri did the same. The difference is, he did not learn to take care of the child directly such as changing diapers, bathing, etc. But he learned to put aside his ego as well as his emotions. He endured as much as he could when he was tired from work in the office, and when he was resting he had to be disturbed by the cries of our son.

I who was overwhelmed and barely slept every night at least often made my emotions unstable and unconsciously said ketus. He also understood my situation and chose silence to avoid provoking emotions that could result in a fight. Even many times he offered to take turns taking care of our son. I will refuse his help as long as I can handle it. The reason, because he must have been quite tired after a day of work. For the reasons I mentioned, he chose to fully support what I was doing.

Small and trivial attention such as bringing a pillow when I breastfeed or taking me a warm drink in the middle of the night makes my energy that is almost minus become fully recharged.

Now I understand how there are so many stories about mothers who get postpartum depression. Wasn't easy. Really am. It is not easy to enter the phase of a mother. 24 Hours a day is too short.

A mother is required to condition and instinct to always protect the child. That is why, many mothers put their priorities to such a number. Number one? It's clear, son.

Support in any form and no matter how small from real people around is needed. So that the new mother has a place to lean and can still maintain sanity.

***

No less real help comes from my neighbors. Instead they always check into the house if I need anything. When I found out I was overwhelmed, needed to eat or take a bath, they happily took over to look after Dre, the baby whose birth made a scene here.

***

"Neng, our house can already be occupied. What about neng?" Mas Yandri asked me while holding Dre. While me? I was enjoying the soto padang that Mas Yandri brought after work.

Mas Yandri shook his head, "I mean, when do you want to move?"

I gestured for Mas Yandri to wait until I finished eating. After drinking a glass of warm water, I said,

"Neng is here, Mom."

Mas Yandri nodded his head.

"Yes, anyway, Neng. It's also more difficult here. In addition, Mas is also calm because here you know many people. They are always asked to offer help. While there, there are still not many neighbors because it is a new housing."

"When do you think?"

Mas Yandri was silent for a while after peeking at Dre's cheek.

"The house is actually a house of service. So for rent every year can be from Mas office. Previously, if we occupied our own house, rent would still be given. So Mas thought it was good, we got the rent of a house, but occupy our own house. So itung-itung Mas office rented our house as an official house."

"Oh that's it, Neng just found out. Unfortunately also yes, if not placed later the house is damaged. If contrasted, maybe not many will want because the environment is still quiet."

"What's on the credit oper again that Neng? Keep looking for a house in the area?" Yandri asked.

I looked into his eyes. "Yes can also Mas, try to bargain to the Mas temen in the office. Maybe someone is interested. It is delicious if this house is also sold. We can buy, hehehe."

Mas Yandri smiled. "Buy the house he said Neng's betroths. We ask God for the best. Even if we have to stay here or move there, that's the best way.

I nodded in agreement, as my hand reached for the package of toast.