Ghost School

Convince Izumi

"I'm sorry... Because the good deeds you see from me are not really good either. And... Thanks for everything"

I kept stroking Izumi's head to calm her down.

"Yes, Izumi is innocent. I understand Izumi is very angry at everything. I understand Izumi hates humans. All the mistakes were always on Izumi. You're so great"

"After all that, I'm amazed Izumi can still be a good spirit. Izumi is too kind, yet people are so cruel to Izumi"

My tears could not stop flowing once I imagined all the difficulties Izumi was facing.

"It must be really painful, right? Being surrounded by people who hate you is not easy. Izumi was so great at surviving that long"

"If I were the same age as Izumi, I would definitely continue to be with you even if I had to be hated as well. I will accompany Izumi in those difficult times together"

Izumi tightened her embrace until I became a little tight.

"Year... All bad things always coincide with my birthday" Izumi muttered

"On my 5th birthday, the company that Papa leads went bankrupt. On his 8th birthday, Papa died, and Mama began to get sick. On my adoptive mother's 9th birthday, Mrs Hazuki died and also at the beginning of my adoptive sister's violence. In fact, the day of my death coincided with my 14th birthday. It all happened as if it had been designed that I was not allowed to be happy on the anniversary of my birth"

"Was... Can I be happy?" Ask Izumi

"of course. Everyone deserves happiness. About birthdays, it's just a coincidence"

"But why am I not allowed to be happy? When I was a kid, I was surrounded by a lot of fancy stuff, but I was still not happy. My only wish was to spend time with my parents, but that whole life never happened"

"When I was just getting excited, there was always a bigger problem with me as if the world was bullying me"

"Yurine... Am I really allowed to be happy? Can I really be happy?"

My chest was tight to hear Izumi's extremely desperate speech. Izumi's heart had been broken so badly that it felt impossible to repair it again.

Whatever I say won't have any effect on Izumi. But at least I can make it a little quiet.

"Of course Izumi is allowed to be happy. Izumi could also feel happy"

"Isn't Izumi happy? While spending time together, instead of Izumi also laughing together? Izumi continued to quarrel with Kagusa, isn't that Izumi's way of getting close to Kagusa?"

"...." - ".Izumi was silent

My heart ached so much to imagine the days Izumi spent so far, to make her heart freeze, unable to feel happiness.

I can't let Izumi think she's not expected in this world, or she shouldn't be happy. I have to make new thoughts on Izumi.

I took off the hug and looked back gently at Izumi then stroked Izumi's head back.

"I know it's hard, but try not to harbor anger anymore. That way, Izumi could feel real happiness"

Izumi immediately shook her head.

"I cannot be satisfied, even after they die. I can't forget all that and let it pass like that"

"Yes. It must not be easy to persuade Izumi. Maybe even impossible. But I have to try to convince Izumi. All he needed now was someone willing to listen to him and give him some more spirit" I thought

"It's not easy to remember everything they've done"

"But Izumi, I have something to ask you..."

"I have to be careful. Izumi is sensitive right now. I can't just talk" I thought

"What... Are you happy when you're with me? When you're with Kagusa and Kei, too, are you happy?" Much

Izumi fell silent and slowly lowered her head.

"Did I say it wrong?" I think panicked

"Ah, sorry. I didn't mean---"

"I don't know"

I immediately flinched as soon as Izumi cut my words.

"Don't know?!" Thought

"Ma..." I was confused how to react. I can guess that, but still the answer I hope is not that.

"Fun, I don't know. As soon as I felt tenderness and warmth, I immediately threw it out of my heart so as not to get dissolved in that comfort. So I don't know if I'm happy, even if it's with you, Kagusa or Kei"

"It's really hard to melt Izumi's heart" I thought

I sighed, then looked at Izumi seriously.

"When with a loved one, a person usually feels happy that cannot be explained in words"

"If you don't know if you're happy with us, how about I go back?"

"So Izumi, if only me, Kagusa and Kei suddenly left and disappeared without news, would you feel anxious? Are you gonna try to find us?" Much

"..." - ".Izumi fell silent again

"I... Would be very anxious... I'll look for you guys... Wherever it is..."

"Are you afraid something bad happens to us as long as we're lost?"

"I... So scared that I won't rest and keep looking until I see you"

I hugged Izumi.

"Thank you! That means you think we're important. You may not realize it, but your heart truly loves us"

"Darling... You guys?"

I took off his embrace again.

"Well, just remember the time we were together, spending time together, what feelings did you feel? Is there a sense of relief that is difficult to explain?"

Izumi fell silent again, then before long she shook her head.

"I don't know. I don't understand myself"

I feel sorry for Izumi. Even for trivial things like 'happy and happy' he did not know.

"I became so angry with the people who bullied Izumi all this time that it made this good Izumi not even know what it was like to be happy and happy" I thought resentfully

I tried to dispel that thought and refocus on Izumi.

"What about the others? Does being with us feel like you're with the others?"

"The others?..."

"So you believe us?" Much

"Maybe?"

I'm rattled. I'm not an expert on feelings, but if Izumi's look was all along, she seemed to be enjoying her time with us, but she didn't notice it.

"Then, is there any of your behavior while with us is mere acting?"

"..." - ".Izumi fell silent again

"I guess... There was... Maybe even everything?"

"Since I've been used to acting in front of everyone. This time it was the same"

I immediately flinched.

Maybe because Izumi heard that story and I was also attached to Izumi, I became a sensitive follower.

My tears that had just dried up were now flowing again.

"?!"

Izumi was immediately startled to see me suddenly cry again. He immediately grabbed both of my shoulders and looked at me worriedly.

"Why all of a sudden?" Izumi asked in panic

I immediately covered my face with both hands while wiping away the tears.

"No... I thought we were so close. I thought we were really partners because you were so good to me. You also kept siding with me and protecting me, so I thought our relationship was a little special"

"But I was wrong. I'm the only one who thinks that..." Mumbles

"What's?... That's..."

I slowly pushed aside Izumi's hand on my shoulder, and I held her palms tightly together.

"You're worried this time too... Does it include acting?" Much

Izumi fell silent with a shocked face, then turned her face the other way.

I tightened his grip.

"Take me, Izumi!"

"Before when I was attacked by an evil spirit, Maeru kidnapped, when we told a story together, when we were attacked by Maeru earlier, what were all the worries and kindness that were acting?"

"Have you been just pretending to be nice to me, and the real you is an evil spirit, who tried to kill me before?"

"I-i-"

Instantly I immediately took off Izumi's hand, and again wiped the tears on my cheek.

"Ah, sorry. I'm a little emotional..."

After a while of breathing and fixing the look on my face, I looked back at Izumi with a faint smile.

"Forget what I said earlier. Sorry, I can't control my emotions. Let's just say that never happened"

"No!" Answer Izumi quickly

"Yes?"

"That's... I'm not acting!"

I know what I said was outrageous. I couldn't control myself and those words just came out of my mouth.

But that doesn't mean Izumi is 'sincere'. I don't know what he's thinking either.

He said that maybe all he did was act, but suddenly now he said it wasn't acting. I don't know which is right.

I also know that Izumi is the type of person who likes to play the word. So I looked at his words from another angle.

"If you look, Izumi did not act when she saved me. We were bound, so inevitably Izumi did have to save me" I thought

"Yes. Izumi did not act when she saved me. I can be sure about that"

"No!" Shouted Izumi firmly

"??"

I'm confused about Izumi.

I looked at Izumi questioningly, then Izumi turned her face the other way with a serious expression.

"No. If I think again, it feels different..." Izumi's mutter

"What?" Much

"When I'm with you it feels different to when I'm with the others..."

"As you say, maybe... I consider you, Kagusa and Kei important. But you're different from both of them..."

"It was warm and sweet until I didn't want to escape the taste. If I'm with you, I don't think I need to pretend..."

"A... What's..." Mumbles

My cheeks were hot. I don't know if this is the effect I'm still upset about earlier or how.

Izumi again thought hard with her serious face. In the midst of him who was thinking, even I myself was misbehaved by his words.

"A... What the hell is this Izumi. I don't understand him at all..." Thought

Not long after, Izumi seemed to have finished thinking. He slightly raised his head and his expression started to relax, yet remained solemn.

Izumi looked me in the eye until I made a mistake again.

"Eh? To... Why?" Much

"There's something I need to test"

"Tooo? What's?" Much

Suddenly Izumi brought her body closer to me. His left hand held my right hand which was on the rock, and his right hand held my back head while slightly pulling my head towards it.

Slowly she brought her face closer to mine.

"A... What's?! Why is he like this?!" I think panicked