Design: A Buana
The Eps 21
^^^One month passed.^^^
Me and Mas Gema are getting more familiar. He seems to care about me. He was always there when I was down to think about the problems in Jakarta. Mas Gema always wants to be a place of my heart. He always had time, morning, afternoon, evening, or night when I called.
Lately he's been picking me up to go to school together. I remember the sentence from the mulu Mas Raksa, he warned Mas Gema to change the number for fear that we would still be in contact. But, right now, only Mas Gema understood my circumstances.
Nonsense when Mas Raksa threatened it, in the end he left me and others who were always by my side.
If I talk about matters of the heart, I have not been able to move on from Mas Raksa. Still often remembered him, when with Mas Gema I still imagined him. Because he was my first love and the only person who managed to find a place in my heart.
I was sitting in front of the house, daydreaming about this.
“Ndock,”
Mba sat next to me.
“Sok school holiday?”
“Ngeh, Mbah. Dino saturday.”
“Yo, a sip of kene angling Jakarta. Koe siapno goods start sak ki, yo.”
I frowned, stuff? To Jakarta? It's not time for a vacation yet.
“Lapo in Jakarta, Mbah?”
“Lho, pyiye. Your mom's a big nuptial week. Piye toh?”
I just remembered about the wedding invitation one month ago. This week they got married. They will become one flesh, and cannot be separated any more than the one above.
My eyes began to glaze over, but as much as I could hide from Mbah. Honestly, my heart still hurts and my chest is quite tight.
Yesterday, I was hoping that this was all a dream. But the truth is very painful.
“Em. Anu, Mbah. My PR is, I ra melu eng jakarta, nggeh?”
“La, piye?”
I smiled forcefully, so that Mbah would not panic and be suspicious.
“Rapopo, Mbah. Sesok Aeera melu eng airport, but ra melu died.”
Mbah throw his breath, “yowes, ojo lali talk karo ibuk mu, nek koe ra melu died.” After saying that, Mbah got up and went into the house.
I put my foot up on the shadow, then bend it. Is this commonplace? I was heartbroken when I knew tomorrow they were going to make a sacred promise.
My tears managed to drip, my chest started to tighten and a hiccup. This sick thing, huh? The departure of him in his past pain was nothing. This is real pain.
I imagine how happy they are right now, choosing a wedding dress and imagining living together happily. Having a baby and living a life full of love. My heart just feels more hurt.
My hand grabbed the guitar that had been leaning against the wall made of wood. The guitar strings started picking, a song came out of my mouth.
For so long, I stepped
Skip story
So far away and so colorful
Yet still
No one can match you
'It made me melt
Eternal in the heart
You're the one who never cared about me
Never cared
I have always admired you
Although I accept
Although I am sad to enjoy
Unable
I forget you a little bit
Even though I wouldn't have you
One of my prayers
One day you'll love me
The various ways I have traveled
'Tuk erase yourself
But you again and you again
You are still again
True love that refuses to die
And stand firm
Probably to death
You're the one who never cared about me
Never cared
I have always admired you
Although I accept
Although I am sad to enjoy
Unable
I forget you a little bit
Even though I wouldn't have you
One of my prayers
One day you'll love me
This song really describes my current situation. My tears kept flowing, the stories of the past, my happy time with Mas Raksa repeated in memory. Little did not believe that it would eventually be this way.
I have always tried to open my heart, but it is as if the eternal Mas Raksa became its inhabitants. I've been here trying to forget him, but failed.
I know, I won't have you. All you need to know is that you are my first love. It's even hard to let go of you and tomorrow I have to learn, stop to miss. Because you belong to my brother.
I violently wiped the tears that soaked my cheeks, stupid, I shouldn't have cried. I have to learn to be strong, do not always crybaby just because human.
“Aeera.”
I looked at the source of the voice, as soon as I hugged the man. The one who was there all the time was beside me.
This pain is to let go of the people we love.
His hand slightly pushed against my body, then he slowly wiped away my tears.
“Tenukin yourself, slowly story. What's up?”
I tried to hold my cry to a halt, but it became more and more.
“Be. snobs.. Hiks.”
He smiled, “taste of your love was not just a comfortable past, yes. I'm starting to believe in true love.”
Hearing her words, my sobs got worse. “Mas Echoes. Hiks.” I went back inside his deck.
I need a hold right now, to keep my mind calm. I felt Mas Gema's hand rub the hair up to my back gently. He tried to calm me down.
I took a breath and threw it out slowly, came out of his arms and stopped crying as much as possible. Stop looking bad.
“True love, will lose equally destiny, Mas. Tomorrow they get married. I am not meant to be with him.”
“Not once did he leave, not even twice. And maybe yesterday was the last time he came into my life.”
My tears started to drip again, but gently Mas Gema wiped using her finger.
“Heart is sincere and loyal like you, don't pantes cry over guys who will belong to other girls.”
“Hm. Match problems, before you were born also prepared.”
“So from today, you should practice not to cry for the soul mate of others, yes.”
The words Mas Gema were very cold. He is a good listener and a good input. I am comfortable pouring my heart out to him. I hope he's not bored.
I tried to smile, appreciating the beautiful words that came out of his mouth.
Thank you, Mr. Echo.
...🐣...
Saturday morning. I drove Mbah to the airport. Already several times Mbah persuaded me to come to Jakarta. But my heart refused it. I am determined to restore my heart, ready to meet my family in Jakarta.
“Yakin, koe ra gelem melu?”
“Ora, Mbah.” Answer me with a smile.
“Ra kangen karo ibuk?”
My view is momentarily empty, “kangen, Mbah. But I should focus on school.”
Mbah nodded, he accepted my excuse.
Before parting, Mbah kissed my forehead long enough, then I kissed the back of his hand. Finally we split up here, Mbah was escorted by airport officers, because he was elderly. I waved at him, I honestly wanted to come along, but my heart didn't.
I took the phone out of my pants pocket, looking for Mas Raksa's name on the contact list.
I smiled, “may Mas be happy, yes. I remember my prayer before I met you again, I would be sincere if indeed you already have someone else. The important thing is that you are happy.”
The name of love is willing to let go, for the sake of him can fly freely and flap wings.
...🐣...
Saturday afternoon. I was at home, sitting in front of the house, strumming the guitar strings slowly. Eliminate boredom and divert wrong thoughts.
“Udah little quiet?” That question surprised me enough.
I saw Mas Gema coming while carrying some parcels. He sat next to me.
“Mas Echo? Not busy anymore?” I ask, usually he's quite busy with the OSIS business.
He smiled, “engga. It's a meal, I brought a chocolate cake so you don't feel sad anymore.”
My eyes are quite sparkling, know him if there is no Mbah at home, automatically I will rarely eat.
“Boiled, thanks yes, Mas.” I said, then devoured a piece of chocolate cake that I thought was good enough.
“Enak?” I just nodded because I was busy chewing.
I was chewing my phone suddenly. Immediately I picked it up, it turned out to be a video call from Mbah. My lips smiled broadly at that.
“Who?”
“Change video call!” I immediately answered the call from Mbah.
“Aeera! Mbah wes press Jakarta.” Babah said, I saw his face beaming. Come happy to feel.
“Thank God, Mbah.” Answer me with a smile.
“Koe piye, safe with omah dewe?”
“Aman, Mbah.”
“Wes manganese tah?”
“Wes Mbah's. Mas Gema nggowo delicious cake rasane.” I invited Mas Gema to come into the video.
“Halo, Mbah!” Previously they were already acquainted, because we often went and went home to school together.
“Nak Echo. Maturnuwun ngggeh wes gawakno Aeera maem.”
“Sami-sami, Mbah.”
I smiled at their conversation, apparently Mbah also did not forbid me to be close to Mas Gema. Not like when I'm close to other men.
“Yowes, koe zinc ati-ati yo, Ndok.”
I just smiled while nodding.
“Neng kene rame. Koe nyesel ra melu rene.”
No, Mbah. I have no regrets at all, because it was the best decision.
Mbah turned his phone, so that it appeared those who were in Mamah's house. Many times, they seem to be preparing for a wedding tomorrow.
I saw Mamah, Mbak Humeera, Aunt Edrea, Mbak Caeera, Mas Damar, and Mas Raksa. They seemed busy so they did not realize that Mbah was recording.
“Ngadep rene dipped, Aeera karo Gema iki loh.” Mbah said, I focused on Mas Raksa who immediately looked at the cellphone.
Mas, I miss.
I feel like crying again. To avoid anything unwanted, I decided to end the video call.
Enough, enough to pay for the longing I've been feeling. Don't go too deep anymore. I don't want to.
One question I have, why did Mas Raksa come to prepare for the wedding tomorrow? Shouldn't the bride and groom meet before the wedding?
Mas Gema did not ask much, it seems he knows the reason why I suddenly broke the connection with Mbah.
“Is there no gap to enter into your heart, Aeera?”
...🐣...
