Design: A Buana

Eps 18s

Today is my fourteenth day in Jakarta. With a heavy heart I must return to Egypt. Not because I don't love family, it's so much love, I'm so disappointed.

If I continue to be here, it is certain that my heart and physical condition will be worse. And also, if I were still here, Madam Caeera and Mas Raksa would feel awkward. I cannot hinder their relationship.

I began to realize that the struggle would be in vain if the one who fought was only one of the parties. In other words, love claps one hand. Maybe for twelve days Mas Raksa just pleased my heart, nothing more. But it only makes the wound bigger.

"If only during my vacation here, Mas Raksa is not good with me." I was wondering while combing my hair in front of the glass.

After bathing and changing clothes, I was ready to leave for Senen Station. My heart was gradually able to accept this situation, although it was still a little stuck.

"From the beginning I avoided."

I took a breath and put the comb back on the table, "huh, just let him joke. So all this time it was just me taking this shit seriously."

I saw the watch, "it's like this. Goodbye home, I can't promise when I'll play here again."

"Hopefully soon." Continue with a murmur.

After that I grabbed the carrier that I used yesterday to the Peak, then carried it. And don't forget my little black bag is cradled in the front.

I took another breath, looking around the room, it seemed I would miss all of this.

Trying to toughen up, I finally got out of the room. Going down the stairs, I knew there was no one in the house but Auntie. Intentionally, so as not to gain weight when looking at all of them.

"Bi." I called Auntie to order an ojek online, because I was reluctant to activate the phone.

"Yes, Non Aeera."

"Bi, I'm asking for help, yeah. Please order an online motorcycle taxi to Senen Station."

"Where are you going?"

I smiled kindly, "turning to Jogja, Bi."

She looks confused, "em, but, Non. Non Aeera's family isn't home."

I chose to sit on the couch, "no papa, Bi. Yesterday's permission to Mamah."

"Yes, Auntie order it first, yes, Non." Said Aunt while walking back to pick up her phone.

"Bi, use cash only, let Aeera pay later." My message was a little screaming.

...🐣...

I am currently sitting in the car heading to Senen Station. I look out the window, the atmosphere of Jakarta this morning is not so jammed, because it is already ten.

I leaned my head against the back of the bench. Closing my eyes, I hope I can get rid of this disappointment.

I hope I can accept this situation soon.

Oh yeah, I disabled my phone on purpose because I didn't want to get a message from Mas Raksa. For the time being I completely avoided him, for one reason or another. One of them is that I don't want to be inedible with her dreadful seduction anymore.

And also, I want to forget him. May my efforts succeed.

...🐣...

The car has entered the station area, stopping right inside so I don't need to walk far. I got off and took the carrier I put in the trunk with the help of the driver.

After holding the carrier back, I gave the online motorcycle the money "thank you, sir."

I looked back at the watch, it showed eleven o'clock in less than five minutes, the sign that soon the train I was going to ride arrived. Immediately I headed to the ticket print place, just queue up. After that I lined up to go inside.

"Anyone, Dek?" Ask a man, you could say still quite young. He was standing next to me, because there were two lines.

I just smiled while nodding.

"Aren't you heavy on a big bag? Here's how Aa can help?"

"Engga," I said cut off.

"Sir," said the officer as he told me to go forward, it turned out that in front of me was empty. I sighed, fortunately I was able to avoid that prankster.

After checking the ticket and Student Card, I rushed to head inside, fearing that the person was following me. When I wanted to see the whereabouts of that person, I was a little shocked, like there was someone who looked like Mas Raksa earlier. But he was just passing by, I shook my head.

Aeera, stop halu! It's a public place, there must be a lot of people who look alike.

I chose to go down the station stairs, towards line one in the eye of the train coming.

Before long I waited, the train I was waiting for came. I got in the carriage immediately, not so crowded today. Maybe it's a normal day and it's not yet time for the children of the region to return to the city of people.

I walked in search of carriage five and seat number 16 A. Finally met too, I immediately lifted the carrier up, so that others would not be disturbed.

"Want me help?"

As my hand trembled from not being strong enough to lift this large bag, there was a person who offered help. I saw the source of the sound.

"Bag,"

"Where are you going, Aeera?"

"Me, I'm going back to Jogja. Where are you going, Ema?"

It so happened that I met Mas Gema, it turns out that he was good to everyone.

"Sama, I have to go back to Jogja to prepare MOS for the new school year."

I just nodded, "here I help." He said, then he got on the train seat and lifted my carrier to be put on top.

"Don't you still have time for a vacation?"

I sit on bench number 16A. The train I was riding was kind of economic, so we had to sit face to face.

"Yes, I should have five more days in Jakarta." Answer me while daydreaming.

I saw that Mas Gema chose to sit in front of me.

"Continue?"

"Hm, there's a little family problem, Mas." My answer was a awkward smile.

Mas Gema looked at my face carefully, "let me guess,"

"Hm, the same problem with your sister-in-law?"

I looked at him and smiled, "looks really, huh, Mas?"

"I know very well the characteristics of the heartbroken."

"Nose, pretend to smile, dull, your eyes are a little puffy and black, go on,"

I'm actually a little embarrassed, is that as bad as I am right now?

"Keep what?"

"See needs affection." He said while smiling jail.

I laughed a little, "hahaha. Could be, Mom."

"If for example you want to tell a story, Ra. It's not good to keep your own problems, you can be frustrated."

I'm silent for a moment.

The one I trust? For now, it is very difficult for me to trust anyone.

I looked out of the car, "I, actually have more of the same taste Mas Raksa.”

“But, he was betrothed to my own mother."

"O, okay. But, don't you know about this? You said he was a candidate,"

I nodded quickly, "no, I didn't know before. Yesterday it was just my hunch that they had a special relationship."

"Ra, that guy's eyes can't be lied to." My eyes in seeing Mas Gema's bead, also my ears are very deep in hearing his words.

"Like water that sees a descending path, he will not be able to switch focus to an uphill path. I see him like that to you."

I thought for a moment, so actually I can't be insecure huh? The water will continue to flow if through the descending path, it will stop if through the uphill path.

Ah, but there's no hope. I basically love alone.

"Destiny has said something else, Mom. They'll get engaged as soon as possible."

"Yes, you calm down first. I hope you go to school later you can put this problem aside, yeah."

I just nodded with a smile.

"I'm going to car seven, yeah, Ra. You take good care of yourself, do not want to talk to strangers. Promise?"

Finally my little laugh came out of my mouth, "haha. Promise, Mas. Thanks for hearing my story."

He nodded, "if there's anything call me, yes!"

I raised my right hand with a smile. Then he walked to another car. It was fortunate that this carriage was deserted, so Mas Gema did not bother the person who should be sitting in front of me.

My heart was quite relieved, after a few days of harboring problems of its own. I ended up sharing it with other people, though it was very little and not complex.

I exhaled a bit harshly, then my head rested on the windshield of the carriage. Come to think of it a lot too are the memories of the two of us, even though I met him only thirteen days.

Starting from her gaze and smile, continue to repel her time at Aunt Edrea's house. Huh, sprain also if remembered. The first time I bergencengan motorbike with him, it feels very kangen, although at first I was a little uncomfortable and reluctant, but finally I missed the moment.

I remembered her three wishes, and everything now happened. Haha, I finally miss him. Missing someone I think sucks, and is also foreign. You succeed. It made me feel like a crazy teenager.

Oh yeah, there was no wind there was no rain he chatted me. Hm, that time I was indifferent, because I had no feelings at all.

My eyes widened, I just remembered he had sent a voice note. He said it was singing to me.

Immediately I searched the phone inside the little black bag that had been in my lap. I open the WhatsApp application, fortunately all documents, photos, voice, automatically to download. So I don't have to reactivate my card.

I put on a headset, after which I turned the voice note from Mas Raksa. The sound of the guitar playing, I feel like I miss it. Imagine when he played guitar and sang a song for me in front of the house at that time.

My eyes started to look up when I knew what song he was going to sing from the sound produced from his guitar lines.

Some day

When we sit on the beach

And looked

The waves in the sea are getting pulled over

Sure enough, our song of remembrance. The song we always sing first. I sang this song in front of him in the car.

Seagull

Fly playing in its roar of water

This natural sound

Warm our souls

My tears can no longer be dammed, I cry, again. I live the lyrics for the lyrics he sings.

Temporal

The solar rays slowly began to sink

Your guitar sound

A melody about love

There's heart

Fires tightly together

Shakes the whole soul

Cheap at the time

It turned out that he had been trying to tell me all along, but, again, it was my fault. I was stupid.

If that time, just one minute I took the time to directly listen to a message from him, all would not happen. I am the culprit. I was wrong, but I was hurt.

This intimacy

Do not pass quickly

This intimacy

I always want to remember

My heart is at peace

My soul is at peace beside you

My heart is at peace

My soul is with you

I cried a lot, but as much as possible I held her voice. Shame when seen by people. I continued to wipe away every tear that came out, but it was so swift that my hands were overwhelmed.

The message at the end of the voice note from him that made my heart so sore and my chest so tight that is,

"Aeera, at that time, this song we always sing in every afternoon while looking at the twilight. I hope that happiness will not pass. But, it was Mas himself who betrayed her. I'm sorry that it's been gone so long. Always pray when you meet again, no one has. Buanaeera, September 23."

My chest was so tight it was hard to breathe. I'm guilty of this. I should've apologized for making this whole mess up.

Buanaeera, the name we always carved on a tree in my garden. And that date, he always said that September 23 was the most beautiful day, because the source of his happiness was born into the world.

I bent my legs over the train bench, then buried my face there. It is my heart that feels torn, it turns out that this wound that creates is myself. I'm sorry, because I can't control selfishness. If you know this, I'm more sure your soul mate is Ms. Caeera. I'm too bad for you.

And now, I'm letting you go.

Be happy with him.

I will apologize as soon as possible, if my heart is fully healed.

Trust me, I am a woman who loves you very much. Always waiting for your return, but that was it. Now I hope you won't be present in my life, again.

...🐣...