The Sun Becomes a Star
Grannies
Every Saturday I go to Grandma's house. My grandmother lives in the same city as me. We're just different houses. My house is located in the middle of the city while Grandma lives more to the edge, to a place dominated by rice fields and sugar cane lading. Which when the night is heard the sound of crickets with sea – sautan and in the rainy season is always heard toads sing to form the rhythm of nature.
Granny's yard is very spacious with a variety of fruit trees – buahan. Next to the house there is a rice mill owned by Grandma which is quite crowded with people. In terms of economics, he is very well off. That's why I find it strange that Papa's life was so hard when I was born. Already a few scenarios of events that I designed – in my brain. Everything is bad, nothing is good.
Grandma's attitude was very good to me. That's if no other cousin of mine is visiting Grandma's house. If I was alone there, she would welcome me like a princess. If my cousin's – brother is there, it seems like all my actions are wrong in his eyes and Grandma started to build – compare me with them. He should have known it wasn't easy for me to love him. When I first met Grandma five years ago, she was just a foreign woman even though she cried when she hugged me.
Grandma doesn't like to callu ‘May’. He said ‘May’ is a Dutch name and I am Indonesian. It is inappropriate for Indonesians to use the name ‘May’. Therefore he prefers to call me ‘Hari’ or ‘Har’ only. And if he's not in the mood, he'll call me ‘Harrrrri’. I'm not at all happy to be called that way, like a guy's name.
Today Granny went to the rice mill several times. Saw some workers who said their jobs were never right. There is less. Less this ... it .. and some other terms that I don't understand.
Grandma looks hot. He held his fan and fanned his shiny face, sat on an ancient chair with brown features of teak wood and was given a stretch of rattan woven round shape – round. I sat next to him while reading a note from the school. Waiting for the right time to ask for a slightly severe problem.
“Grandmother has been staying here for a long time?”
Grandma looked at me for a moment, then swung her fan again. “So long ago Harrrrr ... “ She's not in the mood. Better not to continue.
“A long before your Papa was born Grandma has lived here. This house and rice mill actually had your great-grandfather. Already more than four generations of our family, always stay here.”
Grandma is not in the mood but wants to tell me about this. It is a miracle and worth celebrating. Quick – just quickly I threw away that desire, afraid to ruin the atmosphere.
“This Grandma lived and grew up. Since long ago from now if not for a very important business, Grandma never left this place. Besides because Grandma was in love with this land, but also because your great brother never allowed.”
I just shut up. My mind that had the power to imagine drifted to decades ago. As if – will I can see how this house looks like, how do people – people dress, how they talk or behave when meeting each other on the street. I think all of this is amazing because the times have changed so quickly.
“Actually Har... “ My grandmother's Mood has improved now. “This house should be occupied by your father and his family after the death of Grandma later because he is the first child” actually without being asked and I try, the road to the answer to my question is already on the doorstep.
“Your grandfather was actually one of Grandma's cousins ..” Grandma's talking direction changed. I decided not to straighten. But if Grandpa, who I've never met in my entire life unless that picture turns out to be Grandma's cousin, it's still new to me.
“Sepupu Granny ?” I asked while looking at my textbook, pura – pura not interested.
“Yes, the ancients were to maintain family property so as not to fall to others, they do inter-sibling marriages often occur ..”
“Ooooo “ That's all that comes out of my mouth.
Our conversation passed when dusk came and the wind started blowing a little louder than before. Grandma told me to take a quick shower. My dad rarely told me to take a shower because he knew I was going to take a shower. But different from Grandma. He doesn't think it's appropriate for a girl like me to shower too late. What are these rules? I just want to argue with him. If I hadn't remembered Papa's message, there would have been some words coming out of my mouth. You don't think I'm a brash girl or don't understand manners, but my father has taught me not to keep everything in my heart. If there is anything – what to say quickly even though sometimes – sometimes sounds painful or considered brash. Fortunately, with time, I know how to express my opinion well, even if it doesn't always work. But at Grandma's house, I must not try to argue or oppose. Especially if there are other cousins, surely the comparison Grandma made between me and them will grow and maybe someday I will not be considered as one of her grandchildren. I once asked Papa why I should love Grandma. I guess as long as I haven't known him my life has never been any less. I used to be jealous of the family of some of my friends but I always felt happy with Papa.
“You should love him May”
“Why Papa ?”
“Because …. “ I still remember Papa's confused face back then.
“Because she's my mother May. Your grandmother. You two have a bloodline”
“So then, everyone who has a blood relation should love each other, Pa?”
“Not ‘should’ May. But because affection arises because of instinct. Appearance from inside hearts“
“Papa, how can I love someone I just met a few days ago. Does Papa think it makes sense ?”
“Therefore you must be close to him May. Sometimes stay at home or just visit. He was a good man, May. You will love if you learn close to him ”
At that time I was just silent. If indeed affection can be learned, what is the difference between affection and math lessons I learned since I sat in the SD. I still don't know the answer to that yet. Maybe you know, or maybe I'll know that someday I'll fall in love.
But by the way – by the way, spending the night at Grandma's house is something of a torment. Grandma had a TV, but she wouldn't let me turn it on after nine. Imagine, at nine o'clock at home Grandma like living in a cave with minimal lighting.
Except, if the TV is turned on by my father, my uncle or cousin – my cousin who is male –. So I think the problem here is not okay or not. But it's about gender. My grandmother was a woman. I'm a woman too. But why does he treat me the same woman as he treats my cousin the male – male ?
Tonight is like any other night at Grandma's. Unbearable loneliness. It's quieter with a TV I can't watch. Thank goodness I have HP whose signal is not so strong in – places like this. I played some games until I got bored. I wanted to send a message to some friends but I undone it. Afraid I languish even more by knowing they all missed a beautiful night in the cinema – movie theater or cafe – cool cafe. I miss Imelda. Usually, he's the only one I can talk to if Papa isn't around or is chasing news out of town. Now in Grandma's house there's no Imelda. Who should I talk to?
Not that I expected, my HP shook and the screen shone. Someone's willing to have his pulse reduced to call me. I grabbed my HP and I saw who it was who called me. Foreign number but not house number. HP number of someone who has not been recognized by my HP.
“Hallo .. “ I said as gently as possible so that if it was a man then he would be blown away by my voice.
“This Sunshine ?”
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