The Pain of Betrayal

PART 44'S

it's been a month more I'm in the village where eyang lives, I also returned to my parents' house, and live my activities as usual ..

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my gestational age has stepped on 39 months, but there have been no signs of giving birth, and right on this day I checked with the obstetrician ....

lany: how do doc my son's condition ?

doctor: everything is good ma'am, normal, does the mother not feel the signs like a woman wants to give birth ?

lany: no doctor, I'm so afraid this kid why-why doc ..

doctor: should my advice mother still give birth SC only, because the first child mother is also SC right ?

lany: if that's the best, then I agree doc, I want to be fast-tracked doc ..

doctor: well ma'am, I will look for an empty schedule, let later from our side contact mother

lany: okay doc ...

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*

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the next day the hospital called me, that one more week I was scheduled for SC ...

I've been waiting for this moment a lot, and what I'm most afraid of is the words of his family eza, who wished me and my son hadn't survived ..

I'm just acting on myself, if I have to choose I want my son to live, let me go forever ..

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H-5

the hospital contacted me again 'if there is an empty SC schedule tomorrow ' I also choose whether to stay at the specified time or will indeed agree to the empty SC schedule ,

I contacted kak tiwi, and told her that tomorrow I will give birth , kak tiwi in a flat tone just answered briefly ..

I did tell them on purpose, because my family asked for it, not for the labor money or anything, but rather I should have told them , because the boy in my stomach still has a blood relationship with his family eza ...

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the next day I went to the hospital, I was immediately put into the treatment room, then all the tools were installed in my body starting from the infusion, and the catheter hose, then I was injected in my hand , this is what I am so afraid of, because from my childhood I was afraid of needles ...

then the sisters pushed my wheelchair towards the operating room ..

mama: bismillah son, surely you can, pray (tell my mama while kissing my forehead)

lany: thank you ma

...

I entered the operating room, too ,

now I lay down, right above me was a huge operating lamp, cold sweat started to come down on my body, my heart was beating fast, my body was weak and cold...

doctor: ma'am, don't tense up, we pray huh ?

lany: doc, save my baby, and if he's born please the doctor directly prosecute my baby..

doctor: I will save mother and baby mother, I will do anything for the safety of you both (god willing I will judge her ma'am. (say the doctor while stroking my stomach)

(before my subscription obstetrician knew that I and eza were not together (although outside the operating room there was my papa ,and my sisters were able to sue my baby but I asked the doctor to be the first to give my baby an adhan later)

...

my left hand and my right hand were stretched out, the operating light was starting to light up, and one of the doctors there injected something into the infusion tube ,

I felt heavy to open my eyes, the more forced my eyes were closed ...

(because this was the first time for me SC with total anesthesia, before when the first child SC, I was conscious, only the stomach got to the bottom numb)