SET DUSK
The Part 56
"So ... Where have you been all this time, Da?" asked Midah after all the noise when he returned.
The atmosphere of the house was quiet. The children were asked to rest in the room so as not to be involved with the problems of their parents, while Ana he let go home so as not to aggravate the atmosphere. Madah's cold voice pierced, "Where did you disappear, Da? A year after Kuantan you had no news. I followed you to the village, in fact your home in the village was empty. No one knows where you're going ...."
It was as if he was skinning Ida.
"I'm to Siantar Uni ... Follow me mak etek. I'm sorry I completely forgot to inform the Union" said Ida ciut. Guilt begins to run.
"Whose grandfather do you mean? I've been looking for your mak etek house in Siantar, but tek Risma, your mak etek's wife said, you're not there anymore. Where are you going?" This time it was Burhan who asked in a probing tone.
"I'm still in Siantar after not working with mak etek ...." Then Ida told him all his feelings in Siantar to Madah and Burhan.
"I told you before, Da. If you're in trouble, come to my place. Your children are still my flesh and blood" said Madah.
Burhan was silent. He leaned his body against the back of the chair he was sitting on, turned his face, massaging his forehead while squealing as if to refrain from letting out his tears.
"I don't feel good about having to trouble Uni, I think in Siantar I can really live independently. I was wrong" said Ida.
Ida looked at Madah and Burhan alternately, Burhan's face looking so hurt. It was like dealing with a stranger. Burhan who was in front of him was not like the man who had been attached to his memory. The Burhan he had known all along was a man who had always been full of vigor and warmth, not like the one before him at the moment.
Uh! Where does time take the man he always remembered? He always imparts in every prayer, which always gives him strength to endure in every moment of his weight.
"Now, do you want to go back with Burhan?" ask Midah after a long pause.
"I'm confused, Uni," said Ida lirih.
"Is there no more me in your heart, Da?" burhan asked in a hoarse voice, looking at Ida with wet eyes.
If only Ida's heart was weak, of course she would have poured into Burhan's arms, trying to ease the pain hanging there a little, trying to find peace like the past. However, his hard heart made him unmoved. Just looking coldly at the injured figure before him with the same feeling of hurt.
"You two talk, I want to see your children first" said Medah passed away leaving Burhan and Ida.
"The place of the Master in my heart has never changed, only the circumstances that have made it no longer the same ...." Ida's voice began to tremble, her heart felt squeezed as Ana's face suddenly appeared as she said that line.
"I got sick from being too tired to look for and think about you and the kids ... Ana who knows I am sick, almost every day comes to take care of me because Ni Madah is too busy trading from feed to feed. In order not to be a gossip, I ended up marrying her ... I really don't have a heart for him, Da," Burhan said, as if to explain why. "Not in the slightest did I stop thinking about you," Burhan continued.
Ida took a breath, felt tight. But he tried to rearrange the heart fragments that had been scattered. He was out of words. When everyone thought Burhan was gone, her heart still believed that her husband was alive. But when his hope is realized, at that moment he must face a painful reality.
"It wouldn't be fair for Ana if I went back with Mister." He was finally able to speak.
"Why is it unfair? Is it not common for a man to have two wives? Besides, back when I was with you, Piah used to tell me that Ana was willing to be second" asked Burhan.
Burhan's words made Ida's blood boil. How is it possible from the lips of a man who once had time to melt his heart, consider it ordinary. Though Burhan knew, if he never wanted to be combined.
"I who can not share," said Ida briefly, finally the dam in his eyes collapsed, releasing the tightness that he had been holding. Throw out all the wounds that come back gaping.
Burhan pias's face. He seemed unable to refute Ida's words. He had made a mistake that made the heart of the woman before him hurt.
"Do not worry about me. I'm used to it myself. At least I'm happy enough now, my belief that you're alive has been proven ...." Ida started the conversation after the silence between them.
"The situation is no longer the same. Maybe it is actually our relationship has ended from ten years ago, it's just that I have not been able to accept" said Ida with a voice increasingly vibrating. He again tried to be strong, not want to show how broken his heart was at that time.
"At this time, considering that Laili can be married by her gynecologist alone has made me quite happy, Mister. I don't want to be greedy" he continued.
"This once, please remove your stubborn attitude, Da. The kids must want us to regroup, too" Burhan said.
Ida flinched, how could she forget her children. He only thinks of his broken feelings when he learns that Burhan has been with Ana.
"Yes, I'll ask the kids. Do they want it too" he said later.
"Sir, can I take a break? I felt very tired" said Ida rising from her seat.
"Yes ... We'll talk about it again. I also wanted to ask the children's opinion," Burhan said looking at Ida with an almost desperate gaze.
***
The sun began to leave the quarrel, allowing the moon to take its place. The day that was hot, replaced by night that provides coolness. Burhan has returned to his home with Ana after being forced by Ida. Ida asked for time to think and ask the opinions of children. It was impossible for him to make a decision in a hurry.
"Amak ask for your opinion. Should I go back with my brother or not?" ask Ida when she and the children are going to sleep.
"I don't really understand this kind of business, Mom. But if Amak wants to know my opinion, Amak does not have to go back with his brother. I saw that Ana's tek was a sharp-mouthed woman, I was afraid that later Amak instead of being happy back with his brother, even became injured. It is enough for Amak's suffering these ten years, not to be added," said Laili. There was a furious tone from her voice when she mentioned Ana's name.
"Yes, I also feel that way. But amak is afraid if you decide for yourself, it turns out you have a desire to live with brother back."
"But if like Amak does want to return with my brother, we do not forbid, all this time amak do not want to marry again because it always remembers the brother right?" this time Laili's voice teased Ida a little.
"Ah, not really. All I think about is you. If amak remarries, of course the attention will be divided with your extended father, amak afraid you will feel jealous," joked Ida bitter.
"But the same ravenous feeling that became his biggest obstacle right?" back Laili seduces Ida to slightly dispel the bitter taste of reality they are facing.
"Mom, my brother doesn't love us anymore, does he? Why did you marry that girl?" suddenly asked Fatimah.
"Mis wrong too, Ma. Amak did not tell your mak tuo if we were in Siantar, "sorry Ida.
"You need to feel sorry again, Mom. Amak who always taught us not to be late looking back," comforted Laili.
"Yes, it's time for Amak to also start learning to accept reality. You don't regret amak, do you? If only amak had not brought you to Siantar, of course you have regrouped with your brother, no need to bear such hardships."
"Seeing Amak took care of the three of us, how could we possibly blame Amak." Laili hugged Ida. Holding the clear liquid that began to pool in the corner of his eye.
"Yes, we'll rest first. You must still be tired" asked Ida.
While her children had been swept away in their dreams, Ida's eyes were still staring at the ceiling of the room. His head was throbbing as he tried to understand the destiny God had written for him. Somehow the more hurtful heart, accept the fact Burhan does not know where the limp or see the man with other women.
"Oh God can this be a dream that accompanies my sleep? Enlighten all the facts that exist when I wake up," murmured Ida, again shed the rest of the tightness that he had been holding.
Maybe this is the end of the strands of despair that had always been stored in his heart. It was time to let go of what he could not hold. Let go of what was destined to be. Let go of him who no longer holds the promise. Submit yourself to all Divine Destinies. Whatever trials that have been waiting, he will still try to live it with full rigor.
