Paper Dreams

Chapter 13

My head hurts so much, some scenes are twisted in my head. The man in the photo who was still in Riana's hands appeared in my head. He clasped my hand and said, "I'm going away for a while. I won't be long. I promise I'll get back to you" he said in my fleeting memory. I saw myself crying at the airport. Then she wiped away the tears and hugged me.

"Keysha, are you okay?" Lenca made me aware of something I didn't really know where the memory came from.

"I don't know, I saw this man photographed at the airport. I saw her holding me and I cried. Am I crazy?"

"Key, you just told me yesterday to find out where he is now. But, you seem to forget all the same things," said Riana not nice to me. "Are you sick?" He put his hands on my forehead and his forehead. "It seems, our body temperature is the same." He looks confused with me.

I just realized, every time I come back from the past, then all my mass after I come back will change as well. When I got back in the past, I never accepted Kenan, have I never dated her? Is the person in this photo someone I have a relationship with? I don't know.

"Ah, I just forgot a few things. Can you tell me why I want to know where he is?"

Riana's brows furrowed, she seemed like she wanted to ask again but she seemed to know that I wasn't going to tell her what answer she wanted. "The two of you lost contact three years ago. Because Damar went abroad almost four years ago. But, I don't know why Damar suddenly couldn't be contacted," he said, only answering my question despite my sudden confusion with amnesia.

The damar? It's like I've heard this guy's name. Who is he? How hard I thought I couldn't recognize him and there were no signs I could remember who he really was and what kind of person he was. "Then, where is he now?" ask me again to Riana, then I took the photo and saw it more clearly to find out who the person in this photo really is.

"He's in Korea, two years ago he moved to Korea continuing his S3. I don't know exactly why he didn't get in touch, and why he didn't tell you two years ago that he was moving to Korea."

I glanced back at myself with that person. She put a ring on my hand, and I put a ring on her hand. I saw the incident on the beach and we took a picture after that.

"Have I been engaged to him?"

"No, but the ring you once wore was a sign that she had tied you up" Riana told me. He explained what I had done with the man. I'm sure he's still wondering why I forgot everything.

"Where is the ring?"

"I don't know either. I've only heard from you, that you keep it in a box. Then you'll put the ring back on if he comes back to propose to you."

"Did you know he's going back to Indonesia any time soon?"

"Yes. As far as I know she will be back next month," Riana said firmly. "So, are you really okay?"

"I'm doing fine. Why do you look so worried?"

"Yesterday you had a high fever, I thought you fell in your house and then your head hit, so you forgot all the important things in your life."

"I don't know Riana either, as I remember I just went to the dinner table and then I forgot everything" I said. This I did in order to avoid the next question from Riana.

"It's possible that your head really hit me when I left your house. Well you've just come home, tomorrow let me ask your employees if you still have to rest." I don't even remember Riana keeping me at home all night. Then, I have employees? I didn't even know that.

"Well, looks like I should go home for a break." I stood up from my desk and went home.

"Key!" I turned to look at her when Riana called me. "You have a diary, you write there every day what you go through. You might get a clue to your memory there. Because I think, you don't forget everything, you just forget part of your life" he continued.

"Do you know where my diary is?"

"Father Ria, I'm fine."

"When you read it, I hope you're not surprised. Call me if you feel like your heart is hurting." He stood up and hugged me tightly. Actually, what's going on that he meant? "I know you're strong, but gapapa ko if you want to tell me."

"Yes. I'll tell you. I'll go first, Ria." I loosened her arms and tried to convince her that I was okay and would look for her if she needed anything.

"She be careful." I walked away and when I saw him he waved his hand at me. I also returned his hand.

...****************...

Arriving at home I entered the room and headed to the dressing table. I unpacked the desk drawers and tried to find the notebook that Riana meant. However, I found nothing. It seems like I have to go back to the past now so that I know what happened.

I walked into the kitchen again to see the Paper Dream that was still neatly stored on the table and the lighter that would burn the paper. I thought hard to write when the best I came. Because this Paper Dream in paper is the last paper that I can use back to the past.

I choose a time that is most memorable and most do not want me to live in the moment. I wrote in Paper Dream, 'Back to Kenan's proposal'. I took the lighter and lit it and burned the paper I had written earlier.

The paper began to burn bit by bit, until it all burned. I closed my eyes and here I am. In the room that was dressed. I picked up a cell phone near me. I saw the October 10 date of the application he made to me at a Cafe near the Beach.

Trinjg... Trinjg.... Tringg. "Hello?" I picked up the phone from Lenca.

"Where are you?"

"Still at home, why Ca?"

"No. I arrived at the cafe. But, I haven't seen you so I called you."

"Yes, this is just leaving. I'm on the way now." I grabbed my bag and rushed outside.

"Okay. See you here yeah." The phone was shut down by Lenca.

Tet. tet.. The message came in from Riana, "I didn't go there because I had to go home, my mother said she was sick. I'm sorry, Key, I didn't bring you here. Though we also want all the streets when again right to the beach😭"

"Father Ria, just relax. There is Lenca. What matters is that I have friends. I don't want to be alone so I'll take you guys," I replied to Riana's message.

"OKAY. Thank you, I understand. Have fun yah🫶"

After seeing Riana's message, I saw Ojol's app that could take me to the beach. After getting the ojol, it took me only 30 minutes to reach the beach that we had promised the three of us.

From a distance I saw the cafe where Kenan and I had made a pact. Before entering the Cafe area, my eyes saw something that did not take my eyes off. Then when a little closer to that place, even though I will not be seen by them. I could see the faces of the two of them, he was Kenan and Lenca. It was only natural that they met because of this place, a smoking place.

But, they made me really disappointed. I want to get out of the cafe. But, I also don't want to be caught seeing them together. I turned my body and headed towards the entrance of the Cafe.