NADIRS

Nadir ~ Cockroach Jump

It turns out that unlike what I imagined, Ama's pain this time was really serious. I can see from his pale face and the condition of his body that dropped drastically. Although Ama can still smile, I'm sure the pain isn't messing around. Usually, even though Ama is sick, she will still pray by standing, if not able to hold her most prayer sitting. But this time, Ama's condition was really weak. Never mind to stand, sit, he can't. Forced, he carried out his duties as a Muslim by lying on a mattress. It hurts my heart to see Ama.

From Mangge Raden and Ina Siti I just found out that Ama has been lying down for a week.

“So, why was I just notified this afternoon?”

“Sorry, we've been wanting to tell you since Amamu we brought her down from the garden. But, Amamu, you know she's stubborn herself, she asked us not to tell you first, he said he didn't want to interrupt your school, Uti!”

“Iya, Uti! We didn't tell Amamu that we were going to tell you about the pain!” connect Ina Siti, “Oh yes, Uti, why don't you bring home all the Wira?”

“So she wanted to come, but I forbid. Because, I think Ama's pain this time is the same as her pain yesterday-yesterday!” I looked down, claustrophobic my chest, “Then, according to Ina and Mangge, how?”

“Well that's the problem, Uti, according to Bu Midwife, Amamu must be taken to the hospital. But Amamu refused. Hence, we ask you to come home, who knows if he wants to be taken if you persuade!”

“Iya, Uti, we have exhausted the way we persuaded him to be taken to the hospital, Mr. Kades also, has persuaded him. But, you know for yourself Amamu it's a lot of reasons, he said he's okay, expensive hospital costs are. Though he does not need to think about the cost, there is no way we let him!”

I went into Ama's room. Kupijati. There was no more meat there, only bones wrapped in leather. I don't know where the clumps of his muscles went first. I looked at Ama's body which dropped dramatically. My chest flattened flower tried to hold back the urgent emotions. Slowly my weakening massage turned into a gentle sweep. I could no longer endure the pain that struck my heart. The clear water decays, subverting my defenses.

“Ama...,” the weight of the sound is out.

Ama turned around, looking at me. I put my face in his stomach.

“Why are you, Uti?” ama asked, rubbing my head. And it makes me fall. My body trembled with the cry to keep it from coming out, but in vain.

“Why are you crying, Uti?” ask Ama again.

I can't answer. I don't know why I'm crying. Try to nail myself.

“Don't cry.. You remember, Ama once said, men can't cry?”

I looked at Ama's face. I swallowed pain in my heart, “Tomorrow Nadir will bring Ama to the hospital.” I said.

“Haiss... for what, Uti? Ama is okay, at most a few more days Ama has healed again.” Said, refuse.

“But at least, we check your disease, Ama.”

“No need, Uti, Ama is okay.” He tries to smile. Highlight his withered eyes, groaning, made me no longer strong to urge him. I lay down beside him. Hugged his body. I haven't hugged Ama that long.

۝

Ama was unable to sleep due to her cough and shortness of breath. I who had fallen asleep, panicked to see Ama coughing and spewing thick blood many times. Seeing Ama only smiling weakly while leaning against the wall, I went straight outside the room, waking up Mangge Raden and Ina Siti. That same morning, we took Ama to the hospital, using Pak Kades' pickup. Bang Akiat is ready to deliver us.

On top of the car that was shaking through the rocky and hollow road, my arm was Ama's head that was lying frail. I rubbed his dull forehead. My tears were shedding again, for the umpteenth time when that probability was playing in my head. Oi, what happens if it happens. Amen the strongest reason for my struggle all this time.

The wind was blowing too cold like the piercing of ice crystals, I guess. Cold nan subvert. Tearing the skin, penetrating to the heart.

“Propay, Uti!” Ina Siti who was sitting next to me, rubbed my head.

“Yes, Amamu is okay, that is. Rest assured!” Mangge Raden.

I looked at both of the parents' faces. In my heart I am grateful to have relatives as good as them. At least, with their presence, I was able to calm down a bit. Me and Ama are not alone. There are still those, relatives who care about us.

“Thank you, Ina, Mangge,” my word is heavy.

Ama's condition is getting weaker, sometimes I check her heartbeat. I'm really dead I'm afraid that his chest is no longer blooming. I'm not ready to accept the reality.

Apart from the rocky and hollow roads, entering the melodious slippery asphalt in our eyes of the people of the Village, the, Bang Akiat who had used to bring emergency patients from our Village to the Regional Hospital directly pressed the gas pedal in such a way, suddenly. Our bodies were pushed to the back of the car. It was fortunate that I was holding on to the iron frame of the back carriage I was heading to. While Ina Siti who could not anticipate, immediately staggered.

“Oi, Ina!” his screeches.

Ina Siti, who could not control her body weight which had been too inclined towards her husband, directly hit her husband's body. Be the two of them hugging. If I wasn't worried about Ama's siatuasi, I might have frowned at the incident.

“Why are you? sleep you Ina ni¹⁵ Wira?” Mangge Raden hissed, the back felt sore because hit the side of the car car he had been leaning on since.

“Sorry, Amanyo...he is wrong with this!” Ina Siti mesem-mesem fix her sitting position while looking at her husband's tightened face.

Arriving at the hospital yard which I estimated five times the size of the football field in the village, I just looked, do not know where to go. I have absolutely no experience at the hospital. I asked Mangge for help, he said he didn't know either. Ina Siti, can only shake her head. Bang Akiat, he said all this time he only drove the sick, never took care of this-that. Oi, where will Amaku take me?

Perhaps pity to see four villagers standing next to pickup cars plus skinny parents continue to fight his cough half-dead on the mat inside the car carriage, like a climber who lost his compass in the middle of the wilderness, confused in guessing directions, a noble-hearted hospital guard came up to us. Then we headed to IGD.

“Urus administration, inside.” Said Mr. Satpam.

“Thanks, Sir!” I said.

The hospital sisters immediately ran towards me who was standing in front of the Installation door while holding skinny parents. They asked me to put Ama's body on top of the push― mattressor whatever it was called.

Nervous of my heart faced the carefree nurses with that kindly curved smile. My heart rumbles. Oi oi, if there was a Hero, it would have been him who took over all of this.

Like an inmate doing interrogation sessions, I was nervous about answering the nurses' questions.

“Since when did he vomit blood?”

“Se.. overnight Doctor... Sister...”.

“Suster only!” said.

“Iya, nurse.”

“He has BPJS?”

I gawk. What is BPJS?

“Hmm... possible, no Sus!”

“Hmm... no... yes, no!” i'm affirming.

“After SKTM?” ask the sister again.

Oi, what's more this “SKTM”? do you need these questions, while Amaku is half dead fighting his cough and shortness of breath? Care first! Haiss. I grumble in my heart.

“A kind of ID card, Sus?”

“Not... Certificate Not Capable!” brightest.

“There is such a letter?” I asked, only this time I heard there was a letter that could explain the economic status of someone, made in the village as well.

“Iya, ada... so sister has, SKTM?” ask him again.

I'm shaking.

“Alright.. parents sister, will be taken to the bougenvill room sal 2... later the nurse who delivered!” obviously, again.

“Oh, yes thank you, Sus!” I said.

“But before that, sister has to pay administration as much as 100,000 rupiah first!”

Here is the important point.

“Can't pay in the back, Sus? You see Amaku is dying it!”

“Sorry, Dik, this is already a hospital provision!” said gently. But it sounds very rude to me.

“Then wait a minute, Sus!”

I met Ama-Inanya Wira, hoping they could lend me that much money, actually I have money, but in my account all.

“Tak bring us this money, Uti!” said Mangge Raden, agitated.

“Can't be paid later?” ask Ina Siti.

“Tak can Ina.”

“So?”

“Actually I have money, but in the account all... account I do not bring now, I have the same Wira in kos!” I said.

“Away your cost?”

I just realized, that Ina Siti has never even visited us at the boarding house. Just Mangge Raden, once in a while.

“Not so far, but also free Ina, new Bank open tomorrow morning!”

“So, how is this?”

Again my luck was helped by a security guard. Not at the BIS, not at the hospital. As if in this sequence of my life, Satpam is a helper angel sent by God whenever and wherever I was pressed.

Only with a seal of promise and a death oath, the security guard was willing to give a loan of money as big as it was impermeable to me.

“Thank you, sir.. once again thank you... tomorrow I promise, will return the money Mr!” I said to the Security Guard, kissing his hand.

“Ah, don't you think that, what matters is the safety of your parents first!” said. Oi, the beautiful heart of this Mr. Satpam.

So, for us Village people who always have the potential to get lost in the Hospital that has many buildings and this room, Pak Satpam also helped us bring Ama to the Bugenvil room sal 2. Because of the incident tonight I am grateful, in the future I can be familiar with Mr. Satpam who lightly helped his neighbor, it.

The room called Bugenvil sal 2 I think is a spacious room with two push cots, a special bathroom, a refrigerator where to cool drinks, like the nursery that I often see in movies. Apparently not at all. Far away.

The room with a name as beautiful as that flower, was none other than a 3rd class room inhabited by no less than ten patients. There is no barrier, everything can say-say Hello while grinning without any barrier curtain. And worse yet―really I was shaking if I imagined the room, until now―bathroom is far from decent. Especially for the sick.

Already the water is jammed.. slippery floor mossy, the closet is clogged so that has been provided a closet brush to push the dirt until it enters and glides freely towards the sebiteng. And the smell, hmm. don't you ask, man, just one breath can be dizzy your head for days. Like a hallucinogenic substance, so. Haiss, anyway if there is the cruelest biological killing machine, the smell of the bathroom is the detonator.

At first glance I thought, if the condition of all the rooms in the hospital like this, maybe the name should be changed. Not hospitals anymore, but houses make people sick.

۝

In the morning, Ama and Ina ni Wira came home. They said they wanted to take care of something in the village. They promised to come back here, later. With a heavy heart, I delivered their virginity. I really want them to stay here, with me and Ama. But there's no way I'm keeping them here, while they have other needs.

“You take good care, Amamu it, Uti!” the Peasn Ina Siti.

“Iya, Ina.”

“We go home first, later if there is a chance we come here again, visit!” added Mangge.

“Iya, Mangge.”

“Later too, we will stop at the boarding house, inform Wira...hopefully he has not left for school!”

“Thank you, Mangge, Ina, Bang Akiat, already want to help!”

The pickup truck roared, leaving the hospital yard. With mixed feelings, I returned to Ama's room.

۝

Notes :

Footnotes are in the first episode.