Longing Curtain

Episode 40's

The night wind felt cold to the bone. The water points are getting subsided leaving a little mark on the green leaves. The smell of coffee accompanied my pleasure. For only two days I have occupied this city the sense of comfort I feel.

Sometimes love does not have to be. We must be willing if the person we love does not love us back. It is quite happy to see the person we love happy with others. Maybe fate convinced us that there was still someone waiting for us.

Here I am, living with the shadows of the past. Wherever I go, it feels like he's always there following my steps. Although there is still a little taste, the name of the wound is difficult to remove.

Hafids come with a small white plastic one. Approaching me who was in the dining room. Precisely steal the attention of Siska who all this time he continues to fight. Hafids smiled broadly at Siska who was very enthusiastic about eating the sweet martabak. My saliva was flowing more and more looking at that very tempting martabak. I took one piece of martabak. Just looking at it made my stomach rumble.

"Don't, Ra!" Martabak who was about to enter the mouth stopped hearing the pomp of the Hafids. I'm gawking at Hafids so possessively now. I knit my eyebrows as if asking why. However, he instead propped up the cheeky groaning chin looking at me

"You're sweet, you'll be sweet again." I shook my head at the romantic effort of the Hafids. While Siska glared ferociously at Hafids, her gaze was full of probing.

"Why don't you go back, anyway?" They both looked at me simultaneously. Look at each other without blinking. Indeed they should have been together, rather than continue to fuss when close to others.

"Te ... satay!" I turned to the source of the voice, Brother Fahmi just interrupted my conversation. Intentionally made the atmosphere become chaotic. He agreed to sit next to me and immediately picked up the martabak lying on the table.

"How about we go for a walk, a weekly night." It was also good for Fahmi. This is the fate of singles, feeling lonely on a weekly night.

"May also tuh, what if we find food I happen to be laper nih." I showed a row of white teeth while stroking my stomach that had thrashed this.

"Take Hamzah there." Instantly I closed my mouth looking at the look on the face of Kak Fahmi who smiled thinly. "Why me?" He drank water up to the toilet, raising his eyebrows to look at me.

"Don't it just stick to stamps every day?" Fahmi's sister glared mischievously, although it was true.

With a shaky step I approached Hamzah's room. The three of them laughed mischievously at the dining table looking at me. I stick out my tongue to reply to their material. The door opened, intent to call me undo seeing him who was fervently praying.

"O Allah, if he is the best servant, bring him closer, but if he is not a servant, replace him with someone better than him. The servant will try to forget him and continue to live with others, only one request of the servant please give him back."

I pegged where my body became stiff, my mouth as if it was silenced it was difficult to say a word. Prayers from him made me realize that he was still in the shadows of the past. He prayed for the past and not me. I had too much hope for him who obviously only considered me a friend. His attitude and words had made me believe but in fact.

"Zahra what's wrong?" My daydreams crap I stare at him, a face that is still a little wet and radiating light that sweeps my heart."It was told by Kak Fahmi to call you to be taught weekly nights anyway."

"Okay, wait downstairs."

I nodded to take the bag that was clad in the room, grabbed it and headed to the living room.

"Lets go!"

We left on a weekly night, Fahmi's position was driving and I was on his side. Tonight the atmosphere was so gripping, cold air penetrated into my pores. I looked around at the decorative lights that were on the side of the road spoiling my eyes. I turned to the car glass to see him who was struggling with his phone, considering his prayer alone was able to make me retreat before struggling.

The table near the window becomes a favorite place to be able to more freely see the outside conditions. The six of us sat face to face because the seating model was lesehan. I just wanted to pick up my phone, it turns out that my bag was left in the car. I rushed to get it before it went missing somewhere.

"Where are you going, Ra?" I looked at Hamzah who was looking at me. Though I remembered his prayer earlier, I must not be weak before him. "Take the bag, why?"

"Please get the phone in the bag."

I turned towards the parking lot, now that my bag was in my grasp. Now just take Hamzah's cell phone. Opening his bag was looking for the whereabouts of that thing. Something fell out of the bag. A medium-sized photograph was lying on the ground.

My heart ached, wanting to cry but running out of tears. The blissful photo was clearly visible in Hamzah's eyes. The woman he was being separated from was also the same, looking happy to have a beautiful face and just deserved Hamzah liked it turned out she was so perfect.

My face lowered, my fingers squeezing into each other. Trying to hold back the tightness that is in the heart. My mind was in a frenzy, wondering what really happened. "Zahra." I quickly put the photo in my bag. I smile sweetly at the man next to me.

I looked at him doubtfully, worried that I would see him holding the photo. He went around the car like he was looking for something. I clasped the bag tightly, trying to hide what I found.

"Meet?" I nodded, handing over the phone I had in my hand. She smiled sweetly and then pulled me in.

My mind kept raging, hesitating to ask the truth about the photo. Maybe this is not a good time to ask about that person. "You cry, Dek?"

The bead my eyes met implied something I felt. I quickly shook my head avoiding that probing gaze.

"Instead we sit down misah aja, let's talk about it." Nara clasped Siska's hand inviting her to sit together at the other table. Fahmi prevents her from getting a strange look from Nara.

"Why, Brother? Sorry, Siska I ordered so don't disturb our quality time." Fahmi's brother advances the lips of his failed attempt to be alone with Siska. Hafids was busy with his own business.

"Meaning the woman does not need to be asked why, you should be able to understand which circumstances need to be asked or not. If the problem is crying, it means he is not able to withstand his heartache. He'd rather be quiet because he wants to hide his sadness not because he's arrogant."

They fell silent after I dabbled with his warm chatter. I looked at Fahmi's sister who was staring at Hafids meaningfully. Blinking one of his eyes and linking his eyebrows as if giving a code to the Hafids. I turned to look at Hafids he shuddered not understanding Kak Fahmi's code. Fahmi's sister patted the eel rolling lazy eyes staring at Hafids. Why should the codes when the distance is close together.

Now I and Hamzah live on the spot. He was stirring up a drink while smiling at his phone. Simply explained that he considered me an ordinary person. The proof all this time he never revealed the name love.

"What do you think of me, Zah?" Manic eyes we met looking at each other."Why is that?" I threw away my face hearing him ask back.

"Living answered what's hard, anyway."

I threw my face in the other direction. If he loves me, he should have answered what I had to say. But instead ask back.

"I feel like you're living with the shadows of the past, Zah." The sound of a glass knocking made me turn, he snorted. "As you know."

Those few words were enough to explain the meaning of my existence. The happy photo explains how the woman is precious to him, whereas I am just a dust grain.

"Women in navy dresses are beautiful huh, Zah." He looked up, raising his eyebrows. "Who?"

I smiled slightly raising the corner of my right lip. He looked at me, I cut off eye contact with him. "Beautiful woman in navy dress and tall man in white cocoa dress while carrying flower bucket in hand. Isn't it harmonious?"

He seemed to think from his wrinkled forehead. I think he understands what I mean. He should have known, because he was also in the picture.

"Woman?" I'm nodding. "Bucket flowers?" I nodded the umpteenth time. His forehead creased for longer thinking about what I said.

I snorted, turning the lazy eyeball facing Hamzah's confused look. Do I have to submit a photo so he doesn't think longer?

I stirred up a drink, still looking at Hamzah's confused face. He's still struggling with the navy dress woman I'm talking about. A moment later he cleared his throat, maybe he understood what I meant.

"On the past problem the other day .. I'm sure you'll come back someday." He looked at me with his narrow eyes. "Why can you conclude that?"

I smiled shifting the drink he was holding. Replacing the used drink glass with a glass that he had been drinking. "If you have honey in your glass, don't you drink it?"

"Drink," he answered briefly. I smile. "If it's finished eating, you throw away the glass or keep it?"

"Dispose, empty glass time saved?" My proof works, he'd rather throw the glass away. "That means that if you are saturated with me, you will do me the same as the glass. Dumped and left behind, right?" He shakes denying my words.

"I'll never be like that, Ra." I shook my head, returning the glass I had kept away. "Just enjoy what's there, before everything changes because of the situation."

"Don't joke like that, Ra."

"I'm not kidding, Zah." He's closing in on eroding the distance. "Aren't we here for the holidays? Why talk about the past?" He was about to hold his shoulder, but soon I was pat.

Tears welled up in the eyes at the thought of Hamzah who was about to leave like that man. I was just about to feel happy, but now all is gone leaving a wound.

"I think you're sincere, Zah. But ...." I pointed at his chest hard. "You're just like them."

"What are you talking about, Ra? I don't understand. I'm sorry if I got it wrong, but what's my fault?" I looked up at the twinkle in his eyes. "You're not wrong, I'm too hopeful."

I looked away, while he continued to rub my shoulders. Has my cry not made her realize that I'm talking about it?

My eyes are rounded. The man I met on the side of the road was passing in front of me with a woman. Whether he realized it or not I saw him. My thoughts only led to that woman in the blue dress. Have an ideal body posture and also beautiful.

That woman is nothing compared to this ugly me. She is much more attractive, beautiful, smart and educated. It is fitting that Brother Syarif chose him so perfectly. Did I not decide to hate? Why do I keep thinking about it?

They continued the action, jokingly staring at each other. Feed each other food so that it adds a romantic impression. I was envious to see it, hoping when it would be in that position.

"Let's go home, "take Hamzah. I still see those two happy couples. "I want to see it first."

Hamzah rubbed my shoulders gently, making me look. Not wanting to ask me what my problem was, but instead thinking I was crying because of that man. "If you think you keep going, when can you move on." Right too, if I continue to expect him until whenever I won't be able to.

Leaving two lovebirds who were making out. Choose to go home and immerse yourself among a pile of pillows. Reducing the burden of the mind in the right way, which is to pour out the heart to the creator. Nature bears witness that the person I love has chosen his own path.