Longing Curtain

Episode 22

"Why do I still think about it, that's love, that's what love is and that's the definition of stupid"

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I entered my room, continuing the tears that I had been crying. Until I leaned my head against Hamzah's shoulder, I didn't regret doing that it was just that I was too disappointed at the situation.

I just felt happiness but why do I always feel pain again? Pain that was not fully treated then why now added again? It seems that I am destined to continue to be hurt, not worth loving.

I cursed myself, why is God so unfair? Everyone can feel happiness why not me! All the objects near me I throw in any direction evoke emotions that have been overflowing. The glass in the nightstand I threw into pieces. Bending my knees into a pedestal and drowning my head in there.

Crying out? This is the best way when the mouth is not able to speak. I'm weak, I'm a coward just because of that problem I shed tears. Even though I tried to be strong, still these tears escaped without permission. He only thinks about his happiness without thinking about the feelings of others.

The moon insulted me up there. Smiled wryly while furrowing his brows. As if you were a coward! It was just weak!'. I looked in front of the broken glass scattered everywhere. Should I take the last step? No, I should be able to get through it and repay her actions.

I opened the whatsapp application especially on a special chat from brother Syarif, opened it slowly and smiled wryly.

'Don't approach me again, be happy with others I don't look forward to your presence'

I smiled wryly at the message, only twelve words but a thousand meanings. He could easily say such a word without thinking. My memories revolve around that terrible event. Just because I helped her out at the time, why didn't I just let her die? God, forgive me God.

Throwing a cell phone at any place crying as if burrowing my face between my knees. I don't care if it's wet or not, the most important thing is that I'm crying right now.

"Deck "

The voice echoed in my ears, but I was still lazy to raise my head. I don't want people to see my sadness.

"You why? From that moment it seemed really sad, there was a problem? "

I looked up and hugged him. Crying in her arms slowly I felt a caress in my hair. My shoulders trembled but over time my sobbing began to stop.

"Why? Same story brother, "he said let go of a hug and held my shoulder. I shakes my head not yet able to say that.

"If you don't want to tell me, papa."

I nodded and came back crying but she grabbed my body, my stuffing became more, when I wanted to forget it but instead always remembered it.

"So this is what made you cry deck? " he said take off his embrace and look at me.

I was shocked when Fahmi's brother had my phone. I hesitated.

"It's really outrageous! How dare he send a message like this, "he said, I just kept quiet.

"The face is fine but the behavior is rotten!" again, I became sobbing again.

"Can't let you teach me a lesson!"

I shook my head quickly as I clasped Fahmi's hand tightly afraid he would do something reckless.

"Let sis, free she's in Jogja right now. Don't have to be taught a lesson, one day he will definitely feel the consequences "

I looked at Fahmi for sure. He smiled and hugged me.

"What is your heart made of? Brother is proud of you. But if he hurts you again, brother won't hesitate to finish him "

Fahmi half whispered but I could still hear. He rubbed my shoulders gently cupped his hands together onto my cheeks and wiped away the tears that kept flooding the cheeks.

"Save your tears, she doesn't deserve you to cry "I nodded.

"What's your brother gonna do?" I looked at him meaningfully.

"Smuch a lesson." Fahmi's sister grinned to scare me.

"Don't do anything" I said.

"Yaudah sleeps, it's night. Look your eyes are swollen, like a panda. Brother stay first yes, "

I nodded and smiled at him. He covered me and then disappeared from before me. Fahmi's right, he doesn't deserve me to cry that obviously rejected me outright at that time. And directly accuse me without first hearing the explanation. I should have buried it in this sense, and be happy with my own life. I'm too sure he'll return my feelings one day until I don't realize which position I'm in.

Pull up the blanket and start exploring the dreamland.