Accompany Me with Hijrah
BEGINNING OF SEARCH
ZARRA POV
Today my curiosity was a little treated. But something stuck in my heart. Like a sense of sadness, sadness and shame mixed into one. It turns out that there's a lot I don't know about religion that I've been doing since I was a kid. However, when I asked Umi Fatma where to start, she said of myself first.
I have to start by fixing my prayers, closing my aura and improving my attitude. Prayerfully. I had forgotten the last time I took ablution and prayed. Maybe when Dad was still in the Surabaya region and it was 2 years ago. Suddenly a feeling of shame crept into my heart. Umi Fatma reminded me of the blessings that Allah has given me but I am not grateful at all. Aye! This comfortable me may be caught up in the istidraj, the test of God. I was given pleasure and I left him. God has nothing to lose because He can take away the favor whenever He wants. I took a long breath. Today was a little tiring but fun. On one hand Umi Fatma explained patiently and clearly, on the other hand I felt a great relief.
I'm a little tired. I leaned my body in the seat of this car. Today I use an online taxi because I am lazy to drive or take the car out of the garage. I saw my watch, it was five in the afternoon. Means almost 3 hours I'm at Asyifa's house. My mind still floated back about my conversation with Umi Fatma this afternoon. About prayer, hijab and adab a woman.
I took a long breath again. Today I have learned a lot about the Islamic view of women. What I knew earlier turned out to be just his skin. If according to Umi Fatma can trigger misunderstanding. Aye! Be honest! Before this I looked at my religion as being a little unfair about women. Before I thought, there are too many rules that bind women to men. Today I just found out how special women are. Hijab is a form of respect and protection for a woman. I feel like I have new knowledge. I smiled and could accept all of that.
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I finished my prayer and closed it with a do'a. I remember Umi Fatma saying to beg for mercy after praying. I also said my prayers. 'O Allah, forgive me for forgetting You. I'm lax. Forgive me God, ' I said. I doubt. Should I convey my heart like Umi Fatma's advice? Does not Allah Know? Nevermind! Allah is All-Knowing. I said, 'You Knowest Allah. So, help me'. I said aamiin and rubbed my face with both hands.
After the prayer, I went up to my bed. There's a sense of relief I feel. But there is also a sense of anxiety in my heart. I was worried because I doubted what I had just done. I know that Allah is All-Hearing, even without my words. I also believe that He is the All-Everything. I don't know what prompted me to say it. I said, "O Allah, if this is my way of moving from You, then make it easy. Convince me! Strengthen my heart! If you want me in Your way, then give me that sign,".
The sign I am referring to is the sign of guidance. I need faith. I need a booster. Actually I feel God has made my way easier to learn. If God really wants me to move, I hope that He who has the power to turn the hearts of men, can turn my heart around, convince me that my path is right and I can go back with Malik. When I thought about Malik, somehow there was a little bit of faith that roamed my heart. I'm sure I can move like Malik wants. I'll show you later when I can really emigrate. I smiled and started to close my eyes. I forgot to say a prayer before I went to bed. I pulled the blanket to the waist and completely closed my eyes. I can't wait to see tomorrow.
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Zarra lightly stepped her feet towards the library. This morning he had an appointment with Ashifa at the library. Today, he wanted to have a little light discussion with Asyifa. For some reason, he quickly got close to Asyifa. It is not that easy to get along with someone.
As soon as he entered the library, Zarra's eyes went around looking for that tiny veiled figure. His figure was glued to someone in the corner of the room reading a book. Yupz! That's Asyifa. Today it uses black robe, outer pink, pink hijab and black veil. Looks sweet to Zarra. He walked closer to Ashifa.
"Assalamu'alaikum, Ra. Remember that! If you meet fellow Muslims say hello," replied Asyifa reminded. Uh! Zarra forgot again. Today he also does not pray at dawn because of the bad luck. On the first day, a lot of learning was missed.
"Sorry, Fa!," said Zarra, looking regretful. Asyifa looked at him. He held Zarra's hand gently.
"It's okay, Ra! Stay istiqomah huh?" said Ashifa softly. Zarra looked at Asyifa. He also nodded. "So, today what do you want to ask, beautiful ukhti?," asked Asyifa breaking their silence. Zarra looks enthusiastic.
"Fa, if for example I do not pray one time how? In the sense that I was unintentional, such as sleeping that?," asked Zarra to the point.
"Are you sure to fall asleep?" guess Asyifa. Zarra blushed in shame. That was enough to be the answer for him. He shook his head at Zarra's behavior. "Fardhu prayer is mandatory, Ra! There is no reason for you to leave it except when you menstruate. Whether it's sleeping, on a long trip or even when you're sick. Allah has made it easier for him to replace your prayers that are left behind. The way is combined prayer or commonly called dijamak," explained Asyifa. Zarra nodded. Begin Asyifa to explain the procedure for replacing the prayers left behind. Zarra watched closely until Ashifa finished explaining.
"Thank you, Fa. By the way, lo temenin I yuk!," Zarra asked.
"Where?" asked Asyifa.
"Buy the hijab" Zarra replied. Asyifa's eyes were perfectly rounded. Between surprise and pleasure. "Yes. Buy hijab. You see, I was embarrassed to meet umi polosan kayak yesterday. Where to wear jeans. Umi talked about adab dress anyway," said Zarra.
"Are you offended?" asked Asyifa. Oops! Zarra was wrong again. He should not have said that in front of Ashifa. He also shook quickly. "It's not so, Fa! Sorry, I'm from Nyablak gini. I mean, I don't feel good about Umi. Shame on me, Fa," explained Zarra. She was not happy when she heard Asyifa ask that question.
"Yes already. Thank God if you want to wear hijab even if only to my house. Oiya, Ra, remember the word umi, as a woman, take care of our way of speaking, keep the attitude as well" Asyifa reminded. Zarra nodded with a smile. "Don't just smile, yeah. Practice!," cried Asyifa again. Zarra let out a small laugh and confirmed Asyifa's words.
"Yes already. Come, Fa! You don't have any more classes, do you?" asked Zarra. Asyifa nodded in a smile.
"That could be 'me you', '" Asyifa said again. Zarra blushed in shame. They also walked out of the perpus to the parking lot. They walked while chatting lightly about college. Unknowingly a pair of eyes looked towards them. Staring at them with a thin smile full of relief.
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