25 Years of Father

Sadness Father

"Your father is often like this, brother. Ica sometimes hides in the room afraid to see dad angry. Mama often cries. Ica was afraid that my father would get sick if he would get angry often." my brother said he listened carefully at this time. I smiled hearing it too. Everything that my sister feels, of course, I've ever felt. Even more than that I have already passed. And now my sister feels a lot calmer because she can share her story with me and make friends when she's scared.

I remember how sad my childhood felt. I cried behind the door when I saw the commotion of my father and mother. Sometimes I am very tired of the tempest in my house, but if you look at the fate of some of my friends who even had to be abandoned living with family when their parents separated and instead left him. It hurts a lot more than I feel.

"Anggia, how many days are you still on vacation?" today my father and mother have looked fine from four days of their stay without anyone wanting to talk to each other. I'm grateful, even though four days with Ica were scary. The house feels so quiet. I don't know what makes them both better and I don't want to know what's most important they've made up.

"Still a long time, Dad. One more month." I said with fear. Afraid that Dad would get angry with me because I had been on vacation for too long, he said. And it's a waste of time.

It was unexpected that my father said surprisingly.

"By your package the day after we'll all go to my father's village, in Sumatra." I and Ica were both shocked. We looked at the smiling mamah looking at our shocked expressions.

Ica was so enthusiastic about watching our trip and dad was so happy to see his favorite son laughing so much. The long journey that I thought was over turned out to still have to board the plane back the next morning after we arrived in Jakarta where aunt, brother of father. The family car picked us up at the airport. And here we are all at the moment. Graves of grandparents called opung by us Batak tribe.

For the first time my father saw crying so broken and bitter. He hugged the crying grave in front of where both his parents were buried. Mamah rubbed his father's head and his back gave a boost. Long time father cried sobbing in the tomb of grandfather and grandmother until we finally walked towards the house that is already fragile. The house where all the memories of father with grandfather and grandmother can only be seen by the father from outside.

Father's eyes stared sadly at the building which was no longer his. Father could not enter the house because it had been sold by his brother without asking for approval. I'm really disappointed in all this. Dozens of years left the village, many fathers hope to let go of longing with his brother. Everything feels far from hope. Long time wandering father felt his brother changed drastically.

Regret for father when he had no money at all when both parents died and father could not go home.