The Turkish Male Charm

Never Had It Foreseen

I sat on the bench in the garden in front of my house, enjoying the morning with a glass of warm chocolate milk in my hand, the sandwich I made was still untouched on the garden table beside my chair, my eyes were fixed on the flowers in the garden, but my sight was empty. I don't know why Rudy's been bothering me lately. Ever since she texted me that night, it made me feel uneasy. It's been a week that the message was sent by Rudy. But the message has not been answered until now. If I return the message, it's the same as me betraying my husband, I thought. But I can't deny there is a sense of wanting to reply to the message even if only greeting.

I drank my chocolate milk little by little. Arges came hugging me from behind. I held her hand that was holding me.

"Look at you daydreaming, are you missing me?" god Arges and then he sat in the chair next to me.

This garden chair is very beautiful, its pink flower carvings are so harmonious with the color of the chair is rosegold. Argesse himself chose this garden chair for me, he knew that I really liked the rosegold color. He wanted to be able to sit together with me to enjoy life by staring at the beautiful flowers that bloom, can see our children playing in the garden, enjoy life together until old age. A home that is simple but full of love, affection, and happiness. During my marriage, Arges was successful in making it real.

"Canim, are you ready to see the obstetrician?" asked Arges suddenly, successfully surprised me from daydreams about Rudy.

"Yes?" ask me confused

"Some time ago you wanted to check with the obstetrician, right? Don't you want to have a child?" replied Argesis gently with her sweet smile.

"Ah.iyaa, I forgot. Hmm.either, am I ready or not. What do you think, honey? Do we have to go to the doctor?" calm answer.

"If going to the doctor is one of the best solutions, I'll follow you, baby" Arges said no less calmly.

"When are we going to the doctor?" much

"Whatever is best for you, my dear wife" Arges answered as she grabbed my shoulder and kissed me gently on my forehead.

The next day, as already scheduled, Arges and I had a test today to find out if we could have a child or not, you could say in other words find out who is barren or why we have not had children after 5 years of marriage.

Arges and I rushed away after taking a series of tests because we had to continue working. We'll take the test a few days later.

                          

***

I shook my head when I received the test results. Disappointed, sad, angry as if everything mixed into one. The results reported that so far we have not had children because Arges is barren. He couldn't give me a child.

Arges, who was sitting across from me, covered his face with his palm. Disappointment, worry, sadness, was clearly visible on his face. He didn't say a word. Even to touch Yasmine his wife was undone her intentions.

I was just crying, a deep sense of disappointment, it was a feeling that stood out even more from within my heart. I was crying so much. Seeing me so bad, Arges finally ventured to hug me and said "I'm sorry, sorry to disappoint you, sorry to make you cry, sorry to forgive me". I just kept crying, not answering. I really feel broken and sad. It was as if my world had turned into a gloomy life and everything had collapsed. How much I would love to have a child with my husband. I was hoping that the result was good. It's my fault why I'm so disappointed like this because I'm so hopeful. It didn't happen according to my expectations.

"Oh Allah."my name is Allah. This reality is so painful. Kuremas his lab paper. I still don't believe it. I cried so much, shedding all my sorrow.