Rasidha Bidadari Clear-eyed

Chapter 13 - Black and White

Rasidha only resigned to what he faced, he was resigned to remember his family who continued to demand to accept applications from Ustadz Afif. The news spread very quickly, making a scene for santriwati, ustadz and gus. 

"When it's still going through the process of ta'aruf, why does everyone seem so excited." The one who doesn't want to be the center of attention. 

Since then, he has avoided every time he meets ustadz Afif, and spent more time in the park. 

Inhaling deeply and taking it out slowly, doing it three times was able to reduce the burden of his mind. 

"I don't want to get married at a young age, why doesn't anyone support my ideals?" the monologue speaks for itself like a madman. 

"Don't I support you, we're married and continuing our studies together." Ucao someone from behind, a familiar voice was heard. 

Rasidha immediately looked back, and was very surprised by the arrival of Ustadz Afif who became her future husband, coming along with his friend because he did not want to cause slander. "Astaghfirullah, I was shocked. Since when did Ustadz stand there?" he said while stroking the chest.

"Not long. Sorry, I overheard your words too." Ustadz Afif calmly answered without looking back, his hands tied behind his back. 

Rasidha smiled bitterly, considering the handsome man who became a byword in the boarding school. But for him it is all just ordinary, there is no advantage to admire the man, who remains in his heart is the great prophet Muhammad SAW. 

"I forgot there was a sudden need, I'll excuse you first." Rasidha wants to avoid her future husband by looking for a very logical reason. 

"Wait a minute!" press ustadz Afif to stop Rasidha. 

"Yes, does Ustadz need anything?" bargain Rasidha who smiled forcefully.

The man walked up to Rasidha, looked at him for a few seconds and turned his head in the other direction. "Why have you been avoiding me lately?"

"Sorry Ustadz, I don't want to give false hopes that will hurt later. Besides, I didn't necessarily accept the proposal after the ta'aruf process." 

"I've understood your character, and there's no harm in getting married. Marriage is worship" said Ustadz Afif.

"Yes, that's true, but I'm not ready to build a household yet. Assalamu'alaikum." Reply Rasidha who left that place. Ustadz Afif stared at the departure of the girl who made him fall in love at first sight.

Someone approached ustadz Afif, his comrade-in-arms who understood the feelings of his friend. "Don't force your will on him, give him some space before deciding something. Don't push a girl, it's not good." Ustadz Umar.

"Am I forcing myself too much on her?" said Ustadz Afif who drilled next to him. 

"True, you better not be too restrictive. Give him time and see how God can turn a man's heart." 

"You're right, I'll be patient and wait for that day to come. Soon, the time to replace another ustadz was completed. I'm going to Istanbul to continue my education for a year."

"So what's your plan if Rasidha hasn't given him the answer yet?" ask Umar Ustadz who knitted his eyebrows together. 

Ustadz Afif was silent for a while, he also did not know when he would return in Indonesia. "I'll wait for him, for now let it go." 

"Good, I support you. If Rasidha is your soul mate, then Allah will bring you together again."

"God willing."

Rasidha began to design where he would continue his studies, he wanted to increase his knowledge by studying in accordance with the saying, demand knowledge to China. "I just want to focus on learning and learning, then get married." 

****

In the evening, Rasidha had just finished praying and would continue dhikr and also teach, a routine that he always did every night. There was a voice with his cell phone, he reached out to the flat object to see who was calling him at night. The name of the mother on the mother's cheeks that fit grasped, she immediately picked up the phone. Since the predetermined taaruf process, he got a mobile phone to facilitate the family who called, no longer need to queue and scramble the phone there. 

"Assalamu'alaikum, ma'am. What's up?" 

"Wa'alaikumsalam's chat. How are you?" 

"I'm good, how are you and Azzam?" 

"Thank God they're all good."

"Oh yeah, what's the need ma'am?" 

"Mom would like to have a quick chat with you, would you?" 

"Of course you can, ma'am. Just say!" 

"How's your ta'aruf progressing?" 

"No progress, just walking in place."

"Give me your opinion, son. Don't make others wait too long. They also dare to propose to you suddenly, so give your answer immediately so that others do not expect more from you." 

"I've rejected Afif, even a few times. But he still insisted on marrying me, if I get married, what about my school and even I'm not ready to build a household at twenty-two."

"There is one thing I would like to say if Afif would stop teaching at the pesantren and continue his studies in Istanbul. If you approve the proposal, you will marry before your departure in that country. Regarding your ideals, he also insists that he will not bother you. Think about this carefully, don't judge someone without knowing who they are."

"God willing, ma'am. I will remember it, although it is quite difficult, but I will not stop praying istikharah and asking for directions, hoping if I find the answer to any of my anxieties."

"All the answers are with you, give him the certainty between black and white. If you choose black, then say it well when you refuse the match in front of his family and if white you will get married soon."

"Good ma'am, I'll give you the answer soon."

"Yes, I hung up the phone. Take care of your health there, wassalamu'alaikum."

"Yes ma'am, wa'alaikumsalam."

Rasidha immediately disconnected the phone, and placed it on the nightstand. His mind still looms over him with answers that have not been found, in fact there is no doubt of the Afif ustadz. He is a righteous young man, responsible to others, and quick-witted, and his plausible value is a handsome face that can captivate women.

"Do I have to accept Afif's ustadz?  I don't know him either." he muttered as he thought clearly, remembering what answer he had to give. 

The matchmaking at the annual event really made him feel depressed, especially the Afif ustadz who always watched him when he met with the santri and also the ustadz who were still fighting over him. 

"Will I be happy if I marry ustadz Afif?" he muttered while lying on a very simple bed, bunk bed and he chose to sleep on the bottom.