NEPTUNIA (Hackin Hubrets")

CHAPTER 190 IF ONLY

Sensing something pressing down on her thigh, Nara awoke and changed her sleeping position to face Afkar.

“ if if you still exist... will you support your sister or support Nara..... ? “ Nara murmured inwardly while playing her index finger on Afkar's chin.

“ handsome anyway.... but.... “ muttered Nara stopped unable to continue what was in his brain and heart.

“ the agreement between the soul and ALLAH no one knows other than ALLAH....my destiny......my provision.....my soul mate....... ALLAH has determined the way that ALLAH is pleased...... “ Nara murmured in her heart and her fingers had already caressed the scar on Afkar's forehead.

“ used to be as hard as Nara tried to get away from the mas..... GOD always has a way to bring Nara together...... ALLAH gave Nara the ease of undergoing ta'aruf...... “ Nara murmured in the heart whose index finger had stopped at the tip of Afkar's nose.

“ what mom ever told you is mas... what mom ever said is mas...... a lot of people want Nara to ask mom...... suppose..... “ Nara murmured inwardly while taking a deep breath and her index finger stopped right at Afkar's lower lip.

When Nara dissolved in his various thoughts, Afkar suddenly opened his eyes to look at Nara, whose eyes focused on his lips, Afkar smiled making Nara a little surprised and pulled her finger but Afkar quickly grabbed her.

“ is thinking what? “ Afkar questions make Nara a little nervous.

Nara's nervousness was evident in Afkar's eyes.

“ maybe if Nara used to accept the offer of kak satya to go home on a bike... It could be not Nara who helped mas out of the car..... “ Afkar smiles at Nara's reply.

“ all are already in line... we only live what has been determined.... “ said Afkar while clamping Nara's chin with index finger and thumb.

Nara was speechless at Afkar's response as though he had rethought everything he had experienced before really getting to know Afkar.

“ mas... can mas promise never to die Nara? Can you promise to take Nara wherever you go? “ Nara's words make Afkar smile.

“ wherever mas go.... mas will always carry dear and this.... “ said Afkar while stroking Nara's stomach.

“ later... wherever dear join the competition onsite.... mas will always accompany dear..... “ said Afkar stared fixedly at the eyes of Nara.

For a few seconds they looked at each other, so that no Adhan Shahuh felt.

The second morning in Jakarta made Nara recall her childhood, noticing a waitress who was busy preparing breakfast at the table. The scene that made Nara remember the figure of Asma, unknowingly her tears had dripped wet the niqab cloth that had closed her cheeks neatly. Afkar who felt Nara's mood swings not as happy as yesterday, walked slowly and hugged Nara from behind.

“ remember mom? “ Nara nods her head in response to Afkar's question and immediately clears the rest of the tears on her eyelids.

Afkar hugs and gives a small kiss to Nara's head, as Afkar tries to calm Nara, who recalls childhood memories. Suddenly Fajrin's voice made Nara turn her face away from Fajrin.

“ dik.... “ sound slow Fajrin not able to make Nara see it.

“ dear...... dear must let go of all the sadness..... affectionate anger.... don't be saved...... it has been too long ago dear save all that...... “ Afkar's remarks made Nara take a deep breath holding back the pain in her chest and throat.

Fajrin approaches Nara and tries to grab Nara's hand, but Fajrin hasn't touched it yet. Nara put both her hands in her abaya pocket.

“ dik.... sorry.... brother is wrong.... brother is selfish....” Fajrin's speech still makes Nara silently close both her mouth.

“ you guys talk in the back... while it is still morning and no one wakes up other than us “ Afkar said while pushing slowly Nara's body towards the back garden.

Nara stepped in silence, Fajrin was like running out of words could only follow where Nara's feet stepped.

Fajrin's words made Nara stop her steps and sit on a yellow garden chair.

“ is it because the mother is dead.... so the sister began to reduce the selfish attitude of the sister? Did you not regret being selfish with your sister? “ said Nara and raised his head to look at the morning sky with the air that still feels cool.

Nara took a deep breath and closed her eyes.

“ if only at that time brother did not behave selfishly and did not try hard to seduce mother to go for Hajj with sister..... maybe Nara and mom have gone to jogja maybe even will stay a few days in jogja..... mom said she would introduce Nara to a family that has been instrumental in helping mother until mother can go to college in Oslo..... I know for myself since you returned to Jakarta..... mother must be a father for Nara and sister “ complained that Nara made Fajrin look straight ahead and occasionally take a deep breath.

Fajrin was speechless not denying what Nara said.

“ that time... mother has contacted old friends mother.... mother has prepared what will be given to her friend..... but what you have prepared to become a missionary..... “ Nara said with annoyance.

“ even mother has said what date will go to jogja on her friend... “ Nara's speech stopped and looked at her brother's eyes.

“ sister definitely do not know.... what have you prepared? “ said Nara back sad.

“ during the mother stay in Oslo... mother collected some books about the art of painting.... but mother's intentions never materialized “ said Nara sadly.

Nara smiled faintly at Fajrin's very obvious question of not knowing what items Asthma had been storing all this time.

“ sister has sold it into used book “ said Nara with an angry tone.

Nara smiled back at Fajrin's question.

“ sister angry because sister is selfish.. sister does not give mother a chance to meet her friend..... sister has reduced the time togetherness sister with mother “ this time Nara voiced firmly and high-pitched.

Making Afkar who had noticed them immediately became surprised. Afkar was surprised because only this time he saw Nara dare to raise her voice before Fajrin.

“ if only sister could turn the time... sister would.... “ high voice Nara suddenly stopped.