My Imam, my army

whose wound is it?

When the rice becomes porridge. What to do by a woman who is sitting sweetly on a single sofa while staring at the rain that falls with a roar. The sky seems to be shedding its sighs to the earth. Tells the earth, if the burden carried by the sky is very heavy. The sky has told all its sorrows to the earth. Good earth, listening to the outpouring of the heart of the sky while continuing to give spirit to the sky. The sky must be able to live this life sincerely and patiently. Like humans who are at the point of not being confident and prefer to blame themselves. Claiming that he himself is a loser born without a purpose. Losers who do not deserve to live on earth.

Ara stroked her stomach that was getting bigger and bigger. His birth age is old. The woman was crying while looking at the rain. Rain is a blessing from Allah. In the Qur'an there is a saying that rain is a blessing. Ara understands that. Even very know.

"Why do you have to be inside, my stomach?" said Ara while clutching her stomach hard. The woman was crying too. The sound of her crying that was dimmed by the rumbling sound of rain had been able to disguise the sound of the sobs of the miserable woman. His heart was broken to pieces. For him, there was no more happiness for him. She was a hypocritical woman who had once existed on earth. Ara growled furiously.

"WHY DO YOU HAVE TO EXIST?!" His cry was shackled in the sound of rain. The woman got up from her seat while hitting her own stomach in annoyance. Apparently, the woman's consciousness had dissolved with the falling of increasingly heavy rainwater. With a cry, Ara throws a small vase of flowers nearby to the wall until the vase is broken into pieces of glass that if touched will hurt the hand. Now that emotion has enveloped his own head.

The woman remembers clearly how it started. Ara was disgusted to remember that. The thing that Ara hated most in her lifetime.

**

Ara was reading one of the philosophy books she bought this afternoon. The book that has been crowded in literacy is able to make Ara excited in reading. There is a lot of motivation in this book. It just so happens that the author of the book is also Ara's favorite author. While reading the book, Ara accompanied by many snacks. When reading books, Ara always side by side with snacks that she likes.

Suddenly, he heard a knock on the window that made him startle. Ara was afraid because she thought that this night demon was bothering her. However, he remembered Fano.

A fano?

The man by the name of Fano, often knocked on the window of Ara's room. Ara approached and pulled the window curtain over. Turns right. Fano was outside smilingly looking at him. As with Ara, the woman also returned Fano's sweet smile. He opened his own bedroom window so that Fano could enter his room. Slowly, in order not to be heard from everyone below, Fano went into Ara's room.

"After reading the book, again?" fano asked while slamming his body on Ara's bed. Ara sat on the lip of her bed while smilingly looking at the supine Fano.

Ara nodded her head while smiling sweetly for the answer to Fano's question. Ara's focus was sidetracked when her phone rang signaling an incoming call. He took his cell phone which he put on the nightstand next to his bedroom. He saw who called, then turned to look at Fano who was still lying on his bed.

"Fiancee candidate, you?" fano asked clearly.

Ara nodded, "yes, Dirga called me. I'll pick it up first, okay?" Ara permission on the man who was immediately nodded by Fano.

And without the slightest fear, Ara picked up the phone from Dirga. The woman had no fear whatsoever when talking to Dirga. It was as if what he had been doing all this time was the truth. Ara immediately hung up from Dirga. He reasoned that there was a lot of work at his home. Though he was alone with someone who was clearly not his mahrom. Yup! Dirga's fiancee has betrayed Dirga. He loved her as sincerely as the man's heart. Dirga who was given such an excuse was not suspicious of Ara. Because he believed in Ara. Ara, someone Dirga loved. Someone who is able to make Dirga's heart feel comfortable when seeing Ara's smile. However, the woman had secretly betrayed him.

Ara had long betrayed Dirga with Fano. And Dirga doesn't know at all about his relationship with Fano.

Fano got up from his supine position and sat down beside Ara.

"When do you want to shut up, Dirga?" ask Fano suddenly.

Ara shook her head, "i don't know,"

"You have long told me that you want to kill Dirga. But, what? Your promise is always unkempt," said Fano slightly hardened, "i've been waiting for you for a long time. Come marry me, I guarantee you will be happier than Dirga. So a soldier's wife is a risk" he continued.

Fano drew closer to Ara and directly pulled Ara into his arms. Ara thrashed from Fano's embrace which left Fano confused. Usually, the woman never refused his embrace.

"Why?"

Ara looked down, "i'm so worried."

"Worry, why?" Fano looked suspiciously at Ara. The man forced Ara's face to look at her. It made Ara surprised because Fano was so rude to her. The man clutched tightly onto Ara's cheeks until Ara began to feel pain. The woman tries to keep Fano's hand away, but Fano is stronger than her.

"Because you doubt the same, me?" suddenly Fano's words that turned violent made Ara increasingly stare cynically at Fano. Ara also looked at the two eyes of Fano who were looking at her sharply.

"Because Dirga is more than, me?! You want to throw it away, me?" he shouted furiously. The man gripped Ara's mouth until she grimaced in pain.

"Say bitch!" exclaiming Fano roughly, "the basics of women do not know in profit!" Continue with strong emotions.

"Keep, you took me all this time it was, what?! Sleep, lo?!" he said with mounting emotion.

Fano was really angry with Ara.

Ara thrashed around in the rope when she saw Fano begin to undress. Ara shook her head completely rejecting Fano. However, it was only in vain.

***

That incident was the beginning of the story of Ara who now takes off her own hijab. Because he felt he had become a bad liar. Ara humbled herself. Ara felt that she was a woman who did not deserve to be appreciated.

Ara was crying loudly while being accompanied by the rumbling sound of rain. Hit his chest repeatedly to relieve the pain that had been in his heart. Even if it's just for nothing. Ara had thrown a bolster pillow that was on her bed. He was angry with himself. As a woman, she cannot keep her own nature. It's a great hypocrite. Who can deceive anyone behind his long hijab.

Until the sound of door banging from outside Ara's room had been heard. Ara refused to open the door. For, what? Let Ara now die in this vacuum. Ara was already holding her little knife in hand. While crying, Ara slashed her own hands until fresh blood started to come out of her hands.

Ara had not thought about if now the door of her room was open because of breaking the door from the outside. Salsa immediately ran in with Dirga behind her and Salsa's panicked mother looking down at Ara's bloody hands.

"RA WAVES!" salsa shouted frantically, "istighfar Mbak Ara. God doesn't like what Ara's doing right now. God hates him" said Salsa after seizing the small knife in Ara's hand and giving it to Dirga. Salsa immediately hugged Ara tightly, "istighfar Mbak. Inget if there is still God to vent our complaints. There is still God, Ma'am" Salsa said as she shed her tears. Salsa loved her cousin from childhood. To her, Ara was her role model.

Ara cried a little in Salsa's arms and then thrashed out of Salsa's arms, "WHAT AM I FOR, LIFE?! THE UNIVERSE HATES ME TOO! I'M VERY USEFUL IN THIS WORLD, SAL. SORRY MBAK," he shouted with all his emotions out.

Salsa's mother also hugged Ara who was at the point of surrender. Groped the top of Ara's head fondly to give the woman strength.

"Inget boy. There's a cute baby in your belly. You can't give up on this life" Salsa's mother said fondly as she calmed the woman in her arms.

Ara kept crying because she was so stupid.

"What you've been doing all this time is wrong. But, you still have plenty of time to fix everything" Salsa's mother said fondly.

Dirga who saw that just came out of Ara's room. I don't know what was on Dirga's mind that made the man so relaxed.

Salsa saw Ara's condition getting weaker. Ara's face also started to turn deathly pale. Blood kept dripping from Ara's hands. That made Salsa worried again. He rose up to call Dirga out.

"Mas! We're taking Ms. Ara to the hospital. His condition is getting weaker. I was afraid that something would happen with the baby" Salsa said so frantically that without the woman even realizing it, she called Dirga 'Mas'.

Mas!

**

Salsa was so calm when she found out that Ara was fine with her baby. Now Salsa was sitting in one of the hospital lobby chairs after taking care of the administration of Ara. There's Dirga next to him.

"Mas," Dirga said abruptly which made Salsa turn her head and look at him confusedly.

"Mas! We're taking Ms. Ara to the hospital. His condition is getting weaker. I'm afraid that anything will happen to the baby" Dirga said, mimicking Salsa's voice as a woman. It makes Salsa want to punch Dirga at this time as well. If necessary, Salsa will strangle Dirga's neck right now. Salsa understood that made Dirga so mocking him was when he called Dirga with the name 'mas'. Can't it? It is up to Salsa dong to call her husband by what name.

"Ciyee, call mas," Dirga mocked Salsa more and more.

Salsa, who was preparing to hit Dirga, had his hand held by Dirga first. Dirga stuck out her tongue to mock Salsa. To make the woman stare furiously at Dirga.

"KAKRO ANGKASAAAAA!" he shouted as Dirga ran away from Salsa.

***

Let's fly again, guys. If the author has a wrong apology.

Support me on Instagram @meigasellaap. I'm going to post a lot on Instagram about Dirga hehe.