My Brother's Friend

Sweet little brother

"I know Big Brother is not such a person, but I also realize who I am and it is better if from this moment on we return to each other's lives. Brother Jo stays alive as when we don't know each other yet and so does Aulia, Aulia will also behave the same" I said that with an erratic feeling, between pain and also relief because in the end it is something that cannot be put together should not be united

"What do you mean, Aulia?" Brother Jo clasped my hand tighter, the coldness also spread there. The thing I dreamed about is now something I don't want to do

I brushed him off and he willingly let go of the link of his hand, as if he realized that I could not be forced

"Aulia please, Brother. Stay away from Aulia's life. Let Aulia live this life without having to know Brother, I know between the two of us there is a limit that is impossible to reach, there is a path that we should not cross" I am obviously trying to be calmer

"But I can't, Aulia. After all, Reza and I have been best friends for a long time and it's unlikely that it'll end just like that"

"Aulia knows, sister. Aulia will also not forbid Kak Jo and Bang Reza to be friends, you two can live life as usual but without Aulia. Let's just say the two of us don't know each other"

"But I want to know you"

"Know I'm Bang Reza's little brother without knowing anything else, I don't want to suffer anymore because I realize we're different, brother!"

"Then what if I don't want to know you just as Reza's sister, I want to know you more than this. I want to know Aulia as a woman and not as the sister of my best friend!"

Deg

The words were finally spoken, without any further explanation I knew what it meant. However, it was all over, it was all of no use anymore. I was desperate and no longer wanted to fight even though at first I was sure but now I was realized if later in the end I would just be a burden and a burden.

"No, Brother. No, don't even think about it. We are different, we are not in the same place. I am quite self-aware, I appreciate the feeling of Brother because I myself also had time to think about it but everything is only a story of the past, Brother. Now I don't want to think about it anymore"

"What?" Jo was surprised to hear an explanation of how I felt about her

"Tell me again, Aulia. Tell me if you have the same thoughts as me!" Continue Brother Jo

"Yes, I used to like Big Brother, not just as Bang Reza's friend but as a man. My brother was always at the worst time of my life, Big brother is always present ahead when me and Bang Reza are in trouble but after everything happened I finally realized if all this is not love or affection but all this is just a sense of comfort and security because someone is protecting me" I said once again

"No, it's not all a sense of security and comfort but it's all love, Aulia. You and I are no longer little children who only demand a moment's attention, we both can distinguish where it is the feeling of love and also not" Brother Jo took my hand back but this time I didn't shake it, I let it go because I thought it would be the last one before I would eventually completely move away from him

"I also had a chance to misunderstand it but now that I realized, I was just a child who had been lacking attention and when someone was watching me then I thought if that person put their heart to me, and in the end I knew it wasn't real. Thank you, Brother. Brother is always there when Aulia is in trouble and sorry Aulia thinks everything must be ended soon before there will be more to come and add more sharp injuries than this. Aulia was aware of who Aulia was facing right now, Aulia also knew that the thing that was not going to be finished just like that and would definitely have a long tail"

"So from that, allow me to be near you, let me take care of you and protect you. I love you Aulia and I want to protect you" Brother Jo's eyes look teary and her voice is a little raucous

"No, thank you. Aulia will face what Aulia did, this is all a risk to Aulia. Sorry, Brother, sorry!" I was crying again and suddenly Brother Jo hugged me tightly, I heard him sobbing but the sob he held it as much as he could

"Rest, Aulia. Your mind is in turmoil, don't let your heart be weak and eventually make you give up. Rest, I'll be back tomorrow!" Brother Jo let go of his embrace, seeing him wiping away the tears streaming down his face

"Don't, Big Brother doesn't have to come anymore, there's no need to wait for me anymore and there's no need to remember me anymore. I'm determined, brother. From now on between the two of us is nothing and nobody anymore and it should be like that. Thank you, come home it's night!" I got up from my seat and went into my room

Brother Jo was still silent in the living room, he scrambled his hair frustrated and rubbed his face rough which is now increasingly chaotic, he said, finally he stood up even though his feet were stepping but his heart was left behind and still could not bear to leave

He went outside and closed my door slowly, taking slow steps while occasionally turning towards the door hoping I would go outside and prevent him from leaving

I myself now who was in the room was able to hear the roar of his motorbike that drove slowly and as if I did not want to leave, I could only cry.

Crying circumstances that seemed to have not been on my side, circumstances where I first knew love but love was unrequited and once the love was reciprocated even hurt and sore. I gave up before the war, maybe that's what now describes exactly what happened, I know this is not true but I also know if I let this feeling grow it will become more and more untrue

I decided to stop fighting, stop defending and stop hoping even though at the moment I know that hope is realized but not at the right time. I now realize that what Bang Reza has been doing is true, he forbade me not to know the circumstances around so that I don't get hurt and not feel like this. Enough of this to be a valuable lesson that will be a guide for my life in the future, the rest of me will return to being the old Aulia.

In the morning, I was ready to start my activities, which was back at school. It was enough that I lamented everything all night and now I will begin to become the new Aulia, who can realize what a dream is so that I will no longer be insulted by many people

"Good morning, Bang Reza" I said as I pulled up the dining table chair

"Good morning too, sweet brother sister. Thank you, for cooking and preparing everything" said Bang Reza who also just sat in front of the dining table while grabbing a plate and spooning breakfast. Vegetable soup and also fried tofu, that's the breakfast menu this morning even though I know it will definitely not be as good as Bang Reza cuisine but at least I've tried

Yes, this morning I woke up early and prepared everything, I was determined if I did not want to bother Bang Reza who had worked a lot and sacrificed his youth to live me

"No need to thank you, Bang. We are family we should have helped each other" I replied as I spun breakfast into my mouth

"Ah, it turns out that Brother's sister is already big huh now" Bang Reza ruffled my hair slowly

"Don't ruin it, Bang. I've been combing it since this morning" I grumbled because my makeup was ruffled by Bang Reza

"Oh so now it has started dressing up, yeah. Does this brother now have a girlfriend so pay more attention to his appearance?" ledek Bang Reza's

"No, I don't want to date first. I want to focus on school and college later if I have time then I'll think about it" I feel confident saying

"I'm sure you don't want to date, but some days there's someone who came with you brother, he said he likes you and will chase you until you can" Bang Reza back teasing

I turned, "Who, Bang?"

"She didn't want to date first?" bang Reza is flirting

"Know, it's up to you. What matters now is that I just want to go to school and pursue my goals. About him who I don't want to know" I pouted a little, to be honest I was curious about what Bang Reza said but on the other hand I did not want to make it shake what I had determined

"Don't be angry, yeah. Later beautiful lost loh" I do not realize it and prefer to spend my breakfast

"No. Oh yeah, Bang how does my cooking taste, sorry if it's not up to your expectations" I said to divert the conversation

"Not bad, just don't use too much salt yes, not good for health" suggested Bang Reza, yes indeed my cooking this time a little excess salt, a little bit of😁😁😁

"Make it up, don't give it up" Bang Reza stood up and then put his used breakfast plate into the dishwasher. Although my cooking was overloaded with salt but he spent what he took and did not throw it away, it was Bang Reza's other side that amazed me, appreciating the work of others even though it did not match what he wanted, he does not condemn it, he directs it into better things

"Let's go!" exclaim Bang Reza who is now outside the house and perched on his motorcycle

"Ready, Boss!" I grabbed my school bag and walked towards Bang Reza

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