Let Time
The Part 10
Silent since Zara said earlier they were both equally silent. Arkan still in his position hugging Zara even though not as tight as before. While Zara he tried to neutralize his emotions and feelings.
"What's so fatal a mistake I made?" ask Arkan to break the silence. Zara was silent.
"I've guessed it all must have started because of that night. Are you sorry you gave it to me? I did it also with your permission" Arkan said.
"Zara never cheated. However, it is a right and a duty for Zara. Honestly Zara was just disappointed, Zara was disappointed with herself Zara Zara had thought that in the future it would be fine and slowly this marriage will bring happiness. But Zara's fault Zara's too ahead of God here." replied Zara.
"I'm sorry." replied Arkan.
"There's no need to apologize if you don't feel like you've made a mistake."
"You don't make me an innocent man. Obviously it's my fault. I'm sorry please give me a chance to fix it, we're just as fighting" Arkan said.
"Mas don't force Zara now know that in the heart of the mas there is a woman's name that you expect. Believing the same Zara our family will not be good, our household will not stand firm if of ourselves still keep things that might someday destabilize this household. Zara does not blame the mas, Zara knows taking off the valuable is indeed heavy. Therefore Zara thinks it is better to step back slowly. The promise of our parents has also been made. Their promise is only to match us. For a matter of mate how long it is not our power" said Zara tried to speak as calmly as possible.
"Trust me or not when I decide to accept you to be my wife. I feel confident that you can make me forget the memories of my past. How not the first time I see you without you doing anything you can already make me momentarily forget the others. You make me weird because I have to be willing to take care of my own marriage in order to get as desired because I hope to get married once in a lifetime. Shortly after I said I felt my feelings were made erratic I was like drifting happily without me realizing that the marriage that happened before I rejected raw raw." Arkan was silent he sighed and Zara had tears dripping honestly he wanted to see Arkan he wanted to see his eyes was there a lie from every word Arkan said? But Zara was embarrassed to turn her back and look at Arkan.
"You know without you doing anything you managed to make me a lot of hope with this marriage. How not to be honest at first I just want this marriage just to keep the promise of my parents. But I don't know what I feel my heart and my mind to be looking at this marriage will be the only one and forever for me even though I realized the beginning of this marriage is open from two people who are each other loves. But I think God's plan is always the best. The more you see your duty as a wife well the more I feel ashamed and afraid I can not be a good husband for you. Therefore, since a while ago, I began to gather the courage to start with action even though you may not be fully aware of it" Arkan said.
The first time for Zara to hear Arkan talk at such length even Arkan to often have to take a breath because it is too long to talk. Currently the nickname from Zara that Arkan is a man who is irritable to talk tonight that nickname does not apply.
"But happiness is open to Zara. Even the subconscious is able to think of others when you are with Zara." replied Zara slowly.
"If throwing away and forgetting the painful mass is as easy as the waves abolish the writing on the beach then I have done it long ago. Long before I knew you. But unfortunately forgetting the mass then it is not that easy so I hope that the presence of you can help me little by little to throw all my mass. Please don't back off when we haven't felt any progress at all. Don't collapse when we haven't built at all. Don't stop when we haven't driven at all" Arkan said.
"I can't promise much because I don't know what's going to happen. I will only try to prove as I can and take responsibility for my promises and words." explained Arkan again.
Zara kept quiet she no longer knew how Arkan had tried to explain it even though Zara did not expect Arkan to tell a little about what Arkan felt to Zara. Although Zara is sure that Arkan feels not yet at the level of love as well as what Zara feels at Arkan.
Feeling that there was no response from Zara made Arkan a little upset how a cold and talkative Arkan might have to lower his ego to be able to speak at length to explain something but not get a response at all. Arkan took a breath and exhaled it violently. While Zara still did not know what to respond to Arkan like, Zara decided to close her eyes trying to fall asleep who knows with sleep her feelings and thoughts could be much better. Arkan brought his body closer to Zara he also tightened his embrace of Zara.
"I know you haven't fallen asleep. But it's okay, sleep forgive me" Arkan said, kissing the top of Zara's head, and he also tried to close his eyes.
After the morning prayers in the mosque of Arkan go directly to the kitchen he was already memorized if the morning women must be busy preparing breakfast.
"Assalamualaikum.." said Arkan while hugging Zara from behind and kissed Zara's head covered in a headscarf."
"It's still early in the morning when Maen hugged me" said Alisya.
"Iri yes. Get him to go home and don't fly away" Arkan said. While Zara he was trying to escape from Arkan's embrace by hitting the back of Arkan's hand that was coiled in his stomach.
"Let go" said Zara slowly.
"What a pity so she is just jealous of us she is her husband flying away" Arkan said to Alisya.
Zara was shocked by Arkan's treatment this morning. Even since last night's conversation Zara hasn't spoken anything. But Arkan started this morning with drastic measures. Honestly, Zara does not know everything Arkan did sincerely or just a formality because of his status as a husband.
"Wouldn't make a noise in the morning?" mother said to her two children.
"Abang also continues to complain about Ica" said Alisya complained to his mother.
"Mas mending there do not have to disturb in the kitchen" said Zara.
"Well, you're really out there, just throw out the brother's husband" said Alisya.
"Whisper" Arkan told Alisya.
"It's already there" said Zara, driving Arkan away.
"Yes Arkan already there you do not try to make a mess of the kitchen early in the morning gini" said the mama to throw Arkan.
"This is why the hell on Arkan gini ngusir" Arkan said.
"It's gone there" said Zara, stressing her words.
"OK okay. You don't miss me." Arkan said as he kissed Zara's cheek. Blush instantly Zara's cheeks flushed. While Arkan he as soon as possible left the kitchen he felt strange himself with his behavior this morning. Honestly behaving like before makes Arkan amused himself there is a strange feeling that Arkan does not know for sure what his name is that his heart is beating fast like when he finished running a marathon. Arkan knew and realized the steps he was doing might be too drastic. But Arkan won't back down he's determined, if with a slow movement Zara has not been able to see the changes Arkan maybe with changes like this Zara can realize that she is willing to try and is very confident to choose Zara and run her life with Zara.
***
**To be continued...
See you next part**...
