JANUARY AND MAHENDRA

32. The Flowers that Water Pooled.

**TISYUU YAH GAESSUEE IS AVAILABLE, TIMES YOU NEED.🙃

HAPPY READING 🌱**

...____________❁❁❁..˗ˏˋ 'ˎ˗..❁❁❁__________...

Mahendra is now cleaning the table in Nathan's room, getting rid of the garbage that had been left behind. Gantari and Mahira had gone home about 30 minutes ago and Mahendra told Luke, who was still in the hospital, to deliver the two girls.

Mahendra obviously could not deliver Gantari and luckily the girl understood. Gantaripun never made a fuss about something like this, even the girl had asked Mahendra to let her go home alone, but where is it possible? In the middle of the night like this there will be a lot of risks if you let a woman go home alone, especially she is a very valuable girl in Mahendra's life.

Nathan who was lying in bed was staring at Mahendra who was busy cleaning up the scattered goods very neatly. Then switch to folding Nathan's clothes that have just dried.

The infused man even slightly chuckled, "Bang, I've only seen you slip a shirt for the first time"

Mahendra obtained, but in the next second the man resumed the activity of folding. "Forced me, if you do not squirm your clothes on a mess gini mah I ogah"

"Durunin little prestige bang" said Nathan, "gue want you can enjoy my existence"

Mahendra was a little silent, was there something wrong with him? Mahendra doesn't look the same as he used to.

Nathan understands, it might take some time to reconcile. But if Mahendra continues this prestige, he will never be himself.

"Tetep kayak gini well bang, I want you to be what it is. Teteps worry in your own way." His words again made Mahendra sigh and completely stop the activity of folding clothes.

Then Mahendra shifted his attention to look at Nathan who was weakly sprawled on the bed.

"Gue just want my apologies, sorry to make my mother go away, and sorry also made a wound in your heart" continued Nathan, now his voice began to whistle.

Mahendra walked over to Nathan and sat right next to the bed.

"Gue I'm sorry you, don't have to talk about it anymore. Now you rest tomorrow operation right?. I'm here" Mahendra ordered his hand to move up the blanket to cover almost a quarter of Nathan's body.

Nathan briefly frowned when feeling dizzy but nodded.

"Can I ask for something?"

"What?" Mahendra asked as Nathan asked him for something, as this was the first time he had asked for something directly like this.

"Lo also have to be happy bang, strange is not you ask for happiness for everyone but you yourself are not happy?!".

Mahendra looked at his sister, "Gue is happy, can do useful things like this already makes me happy. It's as if I've lived my life to make a contribution to others"

"Promise, you have to be happy for yourself. Sometimes you just need to convince yourself that actually as a human being is okay to look not okay. You don't have to admit that feeling. Just like you fall in love, as smart as you say 'no' just worry you beat everything said. Everything will be seen even if you keep dodging." Nathan's pretext, the man seemed to be struggling to say whatever he now wants to convey to Mahendra.

With Mahendra's fixed and dense gaze, the man began to emphasize his sentence. "But you also promise after this you must recover!!!"

But after Mahendra's hand began to tidy up the blanket that was seen to fold a little, the man then moved. "Udah, now you rest do not have to think about unnecessary things"

Nathan reviewed his smile with a little restraint.

"Bang-" Call him in a soft voice but can still be heard clearly by Mahendra.

"Eum"

"You drug, I want to go home"

Mahendra chuckled, "his name is also hospital"

"Later anter I made to meet mommy yah bang, I miss so much. I haven't seen you in a long time ".

"Yes later if you've healed, it's impossible we meet your mother with a lo situation that is like this? There was even me who was scolded" Mahendra then responded to Nathan's words with a little chuckle.

"Tomorrow your mother's birthday problem" Nathan sidelines make Mahendra suddenly remembered.

Right tomorrow on January 1st is the birthday of the mother. Even on the eve of the turn of the year, Mahendra was unable to celebrate.

"Well, yeah yeah. I almost forgot. Tomorrow before Operation I bring cake for your birthday first, how?" Mahendra's advice, because this man also does not know how to celebrate birthdays in these circumstances.

Nathan nodded weakly and reviewed the smile agreeing to Mahendra's advice, not bad either. At least they can be happier after this.

"Tomorrow don't forget to wake me up well bang, I want to rest first. Thank you for assuming I'm in some precious things".  Nathan said before his eyes slowly closed, leading to a very beautiful dream.

Mahendra who saw Nathan was almost asleep and regular breathing began to smile with relief. He approached back to his sister, rubbing the jet black mane that had elongated whether it was too late how many months this man did not cut his hair.

Mahendra gave a glimpse of his sister's forehead for the first time, because as long as he lived he never expressed his affection in this way. But it's okay Mahendra won't feel shame because Nathan is already asleep.

"Gue's even willing to risk my life for your life, Nat!. I never regretted doing this even though I had to leave one of my other precious things behind".

"Sleeping well, Nat, I promise you tomorrow we can start things off happily".

Along with his words, there were faintly sounds of fireworks out there. From the direction of the glass window with a slightly open horden emblazoned clearly beautiful fireworks that adorn the sky. Years have changed, days have changed. Mahendra closed his eyes to pray. Prayers are becoming more frequent. God will grant it, right?.

In the second that Mahendra opened his eyes still staring at the fireworks that were blooming up there, the man commented a smile.

"Happy Birthday, Mother."

____________❁❁❁..˗ˏˋ 'ˎ˗..❁❁❁__________

Mahendra woke up and checked the clock on the wall of his room with his eyes narrowed slightly. The clock shows at 7 am, his head dizzy looking for his phone.

Mahendra smiled when he saw the 7 message notifications from Gantari, the girl really made the morning very beautiful.

Gantari said she was on her way to the hospital with all her friends and brought a cake she said was her own.

After replying to all of Gantari's messages, Amahendra went to clean up. After a few minutes he finished with all his personal affairs, Mahendra turned to look at Nathan who was still asleep calmly, and still, very calm until he did not feel disturbed by Mahendra who was opening the horden to make the whole sunlight into his room.

He walked up to his sister then cleaned the nightstand which looked a little messy. After each side of the corner of the room already looked good in view, Mahendra breathed a sigh of relief. He turned to look at Nathan intending to wake him but hesitated when he watched Nathan who was still very calm in his sleep.

Until finally Mahendra in his gaze that made himself immediately blocked along with his breath suddenly choked. Mahendra realized something, there was no movement whatsoever. The man no longer breathed regularly, his breath disappearing making his chest speechless not go up and down like the last time Mahendra saw him.

Mahendra's body increasingly stiffened with all the fear, he just wanted to think clearly this time. But it turns out everything disappeared when Mahendra's hand stretched out to put his palm on Nathan's chest. It's true Nathan's heart isn't beating, the beat has stopped forever.

Mahendra held his breath suddenly, his eyes began to turn red and without realizing it the water just came out without being inundated.

He ventured to look at Nathan's face while rubbing his sister's cheek.

"Nat-" said Mahendra with all his might to review the smile, but nil when Nathan did not give any reaction.

"Nathan" Mahendra again called Nathan, the man bit his lips slightly as if he was holding back the pain and tightness that mixed into one in his chest.

Mahendra patted Nathan's cheek gently, hoping that his younger brother would wake up from his dream and return to see Mahendra.

"Gue please, Nat-. Wakes up. Don't scare me." Racau Mahendra slightly wiggled Nathan's body with a bit of frustration on both shoulders, now Mahendra's body decayed to sit tight with all the pain in his chest.

"Nathanaann..."

It's true, his wound never healed. He's even getting worse. Because once the calamity will remain a catastrophe, the destiny is always this way.

The man further cramped his grip on the side of the bed, his breathing again stifled by the feeling of tightness that increasingly burst. Mahendra again cursed himself, why is God so impatient? Today Mahendra wants to sacrifice himself.

"ARGH!!! " Erangya while hitting the nightstand makes the goods on it fall apart. The glass that was still filled with water was also dropped until it broke and without realizing it also hurt Mahendra's hand. But the man felt no pain in his hand but in his heart. His heart was like slashed, coupled with a hard blow on his back to make this man can no longer support his entire body.

Mahendra attacked with all his strength to vaporize anything that is now restrained makes him sick. His voice was heard all the way to the corner of the room, the man was crying as hard as he added with a faltering sob.

He even hit his own chest, once again he felt regret. He saw death a second time.

His entire body to the point of trembling, the rest of the fear from the experience that had left him almost dead now flowed back into his veins. Now the feeling is increasingly becoming when Mahendra yells and attacks.

Along with Mahendra's shout, the door of the room opened very wide, showing all his friends with Gantari in front carrying a cake that was ready with a candle burning on it.

Everyone who had just entered the room became speechless at once suffocated upon hearing Mahendra's extremely domineering screams of the room, the man thundering heavily shattered.

Gantari was clearly stung staring at the two alternately, her hands trembling to the point of dropping the cake that was in her grasp. Maybe it wasn't just the girl who felt it, but Mahira who saw Nathan who was still asleep and Mahendra who rested on the edge of the bed made the girl's body decay with a blank look looked at Nathan as if his world had collapsed. It's not real, is it? Tell Mahira that if this isn't real, Nathan promised to heal last night.

Keshwari swiftly restrained Mahira's body. Mahira limps, he almost fainted.

Then Luke, Dirga and Yanuar could only be saddened. They came to see how devastated Mahendra was.

Gantari walked over to Mahendra clutching a large body that shook and was soaked with sweat. The man was getting angry and crying like that in Gantari's arms.

The girl can only calm Mahendra as much as she can because she has also followed the plight of seeing Mahendra.

His world seemed to decay, his colors were smudging showing his increasingly withering figure along with the sunlight. Mahendra removes all those colors at one time. He was broken, wounded and sick.

"Nathan come home, Gan." Racau Mahendra was still in the arms of the girl, she hid all her cries on the recesses of Gantari's neck. The man began to limp, until his crying was no longer heard, but his sobbing could still be felt by Gantari. The girl's hand rubbed Mahendra's broad back, looking at Nathan who was still asleep quietly but his heart slipped again when he realized the fact that Nathan was gone.

Gantari biting her lips in tears, she felt Dirga coming to help embrace her body with Mahendra.

____________❁❁❁..˗ˏˋ 'ˎ˗..❁❁❁__________

This afternoon drizzle as if to be a companion to Nathan's funeral. His body was driven home by Mahendra. Buried next to the umbilical herd.

Mahendra does not want to cry again this time, either his tears are over or indeed he is trying to toughen up. But his gaze was still empty as if his life was carried away by the two humans standing in front of him with a big smile towards him. Even in this crowded cemetery, Mahendra can find their shadows in real life. The shadow that Mahendra wants to embrace, the shadow that Mahendra always wants every time.

If it continues like this the regret will never disappear, the reason they left is the imprecision of time. M

Can Mahendra get hold of the hand of the mother who was holding Nathan in front there?. Are they happy now?.

Mahendra bit his own lips along with his tears that returned to flow, even though he thought his tears had drained out. But in fact, he can still cry.

Mahendra felt a grip on his hand make the man automatically close his eyes. The back of his hand was rubbed very gently, but instead of being calm, Mahendra was even more crying in silence covering his face with his right hand.

He sobbed to make his body instantly shake, Gantari followed the roar.

All the people who served and delivered Nathan increasingly reduced, they chose to end it after giving prayers and various kinds of flowers spread over Nathan's tomb which was increasingly wet with rain water.

Until the end only leaves Mahendra and Gantari who still faithfully protect Mahendra.

"Gan, I'm waiting in the car. The same day Yanuar went straight home." Luke said to Gantari and glanced at his best friend.

Gantari nodded her head. "Thank you for Kas"

"Its okay,. Lo temenin Mahendra aja, I'm the same Keshwari waiting in the car".

Gantari watched Luke and Keshwari leave the tomb before she looked back at Mahendra who was already resting right next to Nathan's tomb. The girl also joined in aligning herself with Mahendra.

"It hurts so bad" said Mahendra between his cries, the man was complaining either to God or to Gantari.

Gantari did not answer, because indeed the girl did not have an answer to the pain of a Mahendra. He prefers to hug back to soothe his cries even though he knows like this alone will never be able to disguise Mahendra's wounds.

"Why did they leave me anyway, Gan?. Don't they want it to be mine?" Ask the man who was struggling with an unmoved look at the two tombs.

Gantari sighed intending to give her answer, "lo still have me, Mahendra-"

"Gue promised not to leave you alone" said the girl very gently.

Mahendra again cried in the arms of Gantari, rain water has now wet both of them even though Gantari is still holding an umbrella to protect their bodies. But in fact the rain water still splashed and made the clothes both soaked and dirty exposed to the ground.

The rain was falling more and more as if to disguise Mahendra's cry that was not over. The roaring and tightness in his chest grew as if telling his owner to give up.

____________❁❁❁..˗ˏˋ 'ˎ˗..❁❁❁__________

01/01/2023.🥀

Nathanael Abdi Putra's.

Happy home, Nathan. It turns out that you choose happiness like this, happy by leaving a lot of wounds. If only you knew one thing, He would now be the most regretful man in the world.

.

Being strong is not the only option to hide all the pain. Some of them chose to look fine by getting rid of the entire wound in his heart.

Mahendra, aren't we left behind in life sometimes?. The way the universe works is like that, God takes something in your hand so you can receive something better.

____________❁❁❁..˗ˏˋ 'ˎ˗..❁❁❁__________

And Happy New Year, for you need not force yourself to be anything. Indeed, humans are entitled to ask, but is it not good also if it continues to force?.

Being healthy and happy is not a complete package?. But it's not living its name if there's no pain. Let's be happier next year.

🦕 daynosawrush.