I Pursue Your Love, Rector

Despondent

I chose to go home the other day, I was no longer strong enough to stay on campus after what happened to me. My two friends drove me home.

My eyes are swollen and reddened, plus my face looks very swollen due to a lot of crying. Mama was shocked when she saw me getting out of the car with Bayu, while Safat was driving.

"Darling, what happened, son. Why can your child look sad like this," said the mother while hugging me who came back crying.

"Well, what's wrong with my son. Who has made my son cry, tell me who it is let me make him battered," mama spoke to Bayu with her wrath.

"Yes, there's no one to blame. If there's anything to blame is me mah, I'm making trouble for myself."

"Tell me, son, what really happened to you. Let mama know what to do," said mama gently as she stroked my hair.

"Emmm .. aunt, I guess .. I'm the same Safat has to go back to the campus now," Bayu said very carefully when talking to my mother.

"Yes" answered Mama briefly.

Both of my friends left our home. I was taking my mom into the house. Mama took me to sit on the living room couch. Mama kept stroking my hair, mama looks very anxious about my current condition.

"Darling, let's tell Mom what happened. So that mama knows and does not keep the curiosity of your circumstances."

"Nia's not a papa kok ma, just a little heartbroken now. Nia wants to move to college mom, Nia does not want to go to college in the current campus."

My mother was shocked when she heard what I said. Mama knows, I really like my current college. And I also always shared my happiness with my mother, about the campus that made me feel at home. It's just, I never told you about Mr. Rama with my mom and dad.

"You're sure Nia, you're not papa right now. Mama didn't see that you didn't papa baby, mama saw that you were devastated. Come on, Nia, just tell me what happened to you, son."

To him, my mother understood the feeling I was feeling right now. Without asking much more questions, my mother was willing to follow my request to move campuses.

"Mama will do what can make you happy baby. Mama will talk about your college transfer as soon as possible. Mama's son can't cry anymore, son. You should be happy, and calm yourself in the room first now."

I felt a little relieved by what my mother said. Although the relief never made the pain in my heart less, what else was lost.

I also said goodbye to my mother to rest in my room. I walked weakly towards my room which was located on the top floor. This leg feels no longer able to step, it feels very heavy for me to move.

When I got to my room, my first intention after I got to the room was to take a shower. So I feel a little fresh and energetic.

Before I take a shower, I look at my face in front of the mirror. I looked carefully at this face, and I looked carefully.

Am I really bad? I don't think so, I'm pretty and nothing less. I said in my heart while looking at my face.

"Why sir Rama is so bad is my stake. Am I so bad in my father's eyes?" I spoke to my reflection in the mirror.

Back again, Mr. Rama's words filled the memory of my brain. He said I didn't deserve to love him, and I didn't fit in with him. I am a student while he is the rector.

Behind the sadness, how the spirit appears. I suddenly felt that I should not be the weak girl I am today.

I felt that the girl standing in front of the mirror was not me. Because I can't cry just because I failed in love. Just because about love I have to get out of my college. This is not me, because I cannot despair even if I have lost.