Giving Birth at the Home of In-Law

Wanna Go Home

#Birth_in_Home_Life

#Part8

Lisna's sister is inching closer to me. His eyes were looking out at me, afraid that I might suddenly move and pounce on him.

"Sir."

"Hem."

Lisna's sister was sitting on the side of the mattress close to the tips of my toes in a row. A few moments quiet.

I just kept quiet, watching the look on Sister Lisna's face that wasn't as loud as usual. He seemed to be talking but was still afraid of the reaction I might show.

"Here, Marisa bobo. Brother keep it here yes," he said while putting Marisa in the bed.

He's back inching. Open the room door and close it again after exiting. I heard the voice of Lisna's sister who was scolding Gio followed by a TV voice with a medium volume.

I leaned my head against a pillow stacked three behind my back. "Astagfirulloh ..," I guess the hair is still wet because of the prayer water. My emotions have been uncontrollable lately, sometimes feeling very sad, then empty ... once, angry and resentful towards Marisa, my beautiful, innocent baby. Also very disappointed in Bang Rafi who seemed to not care about the inner birth pain that I experienced.

I admit, I often neglect to remember God, feel unholy because the puerperium makes me immediately forget worship, even though dhikr is the most efficacious heart medicine. "God...." I took a deep breath and exhaled quickly, hoping the weight in the chest came out with the wasted breath.

"Sir." Lisna reappeared behind the door with a broom in her hand. I still haven't left my seat.

Lisna started cleaning my room. Fractions of glass to dust used powder scattering into the air. Marisa's clothes were scattered because of Gio.

After finishing sweeping him back with a nenenteng mop tool and a small bucket filled with water. I can't bear to.

"Sister, let Ning do it," I said as I grabbed the mop handle from his hand.

"Don't! You sit down, Marisa wakes up" said Lisna.

I breastfed Marisa while caressing every part of her face. It should, because of him I became stronger, more mature, and more patient. But, my days here are so heavy, I suffer.

Lisna's sister is done with her work. My room was neat, clean and fragrant. It makes me feel sad and unwell.

For the umpteenth time, sister Lisna came into my room. He sat on the floor facing his body which was now beginning to contain. "I'm sorry, Ning" he said.

I smiled thinly and nodded. I'm not a vengeful person, I'm very forgiving. Unfortunately my heart is too sensitive.

"Sister so remember the incident five years ago when Brother gave birth to Gio. Not yet lost the pain of the scars of opration. The mother came with a blaming gaze, 'Udah was madly charged, uh her son.' That's what he said." Lisna's sister started telling stories while occasionally touching Marisa's cheek.

Sisna used to have baby blues worse than I did. She completely refused to touch Gio let alone suckle him. That was the impact of Mother's refusal because her first grandson was a boy, not as expected.

"Thankfully Bang Reza was understanding, she did not allow Big Brother to return to this house. The older brother went straight home to Sukabumi, bringing the red baby Gio. And just got back here after Gio was six months old" Lisna said.

I moved Marisa to the left hand while continuing to listen to Sister Lisna.

"Once you knew you were giving birth to a baby girl, Brother was envious. I must love you and Marisa's not like Gio. But after seeing your reaction earlier, Big Brother knows you are as unhappy as Big Brother," he concluded.

I want to confide. But indisposed. This is the first time I've met Lisna in a long time. Usually, we only met at important events, mutual pleasantries with Lisna who always showed a hostile face.

"Ning wants to go home to the contract, brother. Ning's not hard here," I said.

"Yes, my sister agrees. Leave this house for the good of you and Marisa. I know very well the nature of my mother. Brother thought you would be a dream ghost for giving birth to a baby girl, in fact it's the same." Lisna grinned.

Sister Lisna and Gio say goodbye before Mom gets home. My favorite heart-shaped pillow was brought by Gio, I resigned. Before returning home, Lisna slipped an envelope under Marisa's pillow while whispering, "Serious brother about you who must be smart to take care of the body, lest Rafi be tempted by women in #Kampung_Pelakor, danger," threaten her.

I just grimaced, Sister Lisna laughed. "Later to tell more stories about it, yes, Brother has a secret recipe," said Lisna while passing by holding Gio.

My determination is complete, tonight I will talk to Bang Rafi. I'm going back to the contract.