About You: Love & Sacrifice

Flashback 5

Younha put her phone on the bed flat after reading Jinan's message. His gaze was only empty on the ceiling of the room and his heart was no more beating than it used to be. After a moment of silence, he got up and walked to the mirror and how shocked he saw the bruised suction under his ears and collarbone so clearly. Buru Buru Younha took concealer to cover up his sin.

Dding up! Ddong!

Younha's index finger that was doing tap tap movement stopped instantly. His forehead frowned when he heard the bell's voice. What is Jinan, because Younha has no other promise than with him. But why not just go in as usual, or maybe it's Jihoon?

His legs began to run small towards the door after he made sure Hickey was covered in concealer completely. Younha was slightly stung when she opened the door and found a white Lily blocking the face of the man behind her—dia Jinan, who then showed a sweet smile.

"Good morning." Say hello to Jinan with sumringah. "Just woke up? Looks like your pillow face."

Younha blinked, then accepted with a discordant smile the bouquet, hugging it tightly while glancing at the man in turn.

"Come in. I'll be ready." Younha opened the door wide so that Jinan could rest while waiting for him to improve. As Younha finished arranging the flower in the vase, Jinan pulled Younha's elbow and carried her into a hug.

"I miss it." Jinan hugged Younha's shoulder tightly with a tight eye. "Oh, I should've apologized for saying kangen."

Stretching hug. They exchanged glances until the higher-ups apologized first after a few weeks of infrequent news. Younha gave a small smile, she also apologized for being too selfish and an inner apology for her sin that Jinan did not know.

"Okay, you take a bath first gih—then we look for a new breakfast to the museum." Jinan stroked Younha's hair.

"Wait, yeah."

Jinan nodded, choosing to sit in the living room while easing her chest tightness. Younha changed a little from usual, if first he would hug Jinan tightly when he just met until he did not want to escape, if he used to always ask for news and what things Jinan went through, if he was always chatty when he knew Jinan had not eaten, if he had always kissed Jinan's face because he missed, but now it has been different. Now all Younha did was continue to dodge with a look of absentminded eyes.

Perhaps, Younha had done the very thing Jinan was afraid of.

...*****...

"You—still angry?"

Younha looked at Jinan after parking the car. One of the things that makes their relationship tenuous is Younha's suspicion, they rarely meet and it makes Younha accuse Jinan of having an affair with Mirae. After the quarrel they never had contact, especially Younha had blocked Jinan's number even though it was only three hours.

"angry? What's for?" Jinan said softly with a sincere smile. "Our problem is over, we've forgiven each other."

Younha smiled even though she was not relieved. They are now in a car park at a night market. After touring the museum and taking some photos—Younha wants to spend their short time by walking the street in the night market.

"Let's go in."

Jinan grabbed Younha's hand to hold. For a moment Younha was dazed, looking at her hand and then sliced Jinan with a small gesture. He was a little surprised, all day they did not hold hands so Younha asked if Jinan was still angry.

Jinan clasped Younha's hand and dragged him in while curling his body past several crowds of other visitors.

They are looking for entertainment in addition to rides, such as extreme motor attractions, clowns spinning the ball, some small magic tricks that make Younha applaud in amazement. Jinan has never been absent to notice all of Younha's hilarious stay because she knows an opportunity like this might not be repeated again.

"Here you go, sit down." Jinan began to sit on a park bench a bit away from the crowd. "Capek, you take a walk."

"That's a hell of a decrepit!" Younha sat down beside Jinan. Start a small chat while enjoying the atmosphere of the night with sparkling colorful lights from the night market. Younha walked three steps forward to look at the fireworks closer and was followed by Jinan who immediately clasped his hands.

Jinan's heart was greatly relieved when she saw Younha happy with her. Several times he also found Younha moving restlessly, his eyes slightly blank and unfocused while glancing at his phone. As if waiting for something. When asked, he only replied that there was nothing even though he was actually waiting for news from Jihoon.

After the incident at the basecamp, they never contacted each other. Younha is a typical person who calls first so he waited for news from Jihoon and until now—they also never met.

Jinan actually knows, but tries to deny the fact that her lover is worried about other men while they are dating.

"I've been wanting this for a long time." Jinan took out Cartier's white gold necklace from a box and put it on Younha's neck. "This may not be the same as you expected. Sorry if—"

Jinan's body is crushed by Younha, the girl hugs him tightly to break Jinan's talk that might explain what Younha dislikes.

"You're doing this for me?" Younha took off her embrace later. "Geez, this is great. I like it." Younha continued to feel the glittering object with her index finger. "Thank you Jinan."

"Thank you also because you've been willing to stick with me all this time." Jinan rubbed his lover's head. His voice vibrates. "Younha, I—"

"I want us to be happy. Get here anyway."

The happy bead that also contained a different look. They are linked—but with feelings that are not the same anymore. There is no twinkle of sincere love Dimata Younha now, even when accidentally Jihoon's name entered in their chat—Younha became very enthusiastic.

"Younha—"

"Hm?"

"Sorry."

"Haish, don't play anymore—"

"I can't get what I promised you. I can't stay with you."

Younha's legs were squeezed, almost falling down if he didn't strengthen his footing. Younha's pupils trembled, several water droplets had already filled his eyes. Hearing that.cannot be with her makes Younha's chest tight. Why did Jinan say that all of a sudden?"

"I don't know what you mean." Younha laughed heartily. "You just joke?"

"Im Sorry."

"NO!!" Younha poked her lips. "Is it because of Mirae? That woman, you rarely tell me and give me time. Is it because of him? Is he not really just a friend? Am I just a stunt? Do you also always come to him, hug, kiss, or even sleep with him?!!"

"Isn't that you?" Jinan unsheathed Younha's wet bead firmly. "Naked in another man's bed when I'm not around. You think I don't know? What are you do?! Kim Younha—look at you!!"

Younha's chest seemed to melt, since when did Jinan know?

This time Younha was speechless looking at Jinan's face which looked very regretful after hitting him with a slap of fact that left Younha Kelu half dead. Then Jinan rubbed her face in frustration trying to grab Younha's body but the girl continued to retreat.

Not because Jinan was angry, but Younha just didn't want Jinan to continue holding onto Younha's disgusting body.

"Jinan.... I-I'm sorry." Younha squeezed out all ten fingers. "I'm sorry."

"No, you're not wrong." Jinan tried to calm down. "I am not understanding until you become like this. Sorry."

Jinan's big hand covered Younha's body and stroked her head dearly, as she always did. Warm embrace with sincere love. Jinan's love is still the same, maybe Younha is not feeling it.

"I'm sorry, Jinan."

"Don't apologize, you're not wrong."

The man stretched his arms to stare at Younha—ia's face so pinched when he saw Younha screwed up like this because of it.

"Did you love him?" Jinan's whispers covered Younha's cheeks, forcing them to wander. "Did you?"

Younha was silent, before shaking slowly even though Jinan knew that Younha was lying. The girl could not look at him for more than three seconds. He dodged.

"Younha, you can be honest." Jinan Lirih. "I'm grateful that someone else can change to take care of you. So, let me know, Hm?"

Although he was hesitant, Younha finally nodded slowly without daring to look back at Jinan.

"Sorry me, Jinan."

The man smiled sweetly then as Younha apologized with a small nod in response and followed by the expression that she loved Jihoon.

Jinan was relieved, even though he was dead.

Jinan grabbed Younha's body again. Letting Younha cry there. Smother him tightly for the last time with an apology from each one that led them to a farewell without regret. Younha expressed many thanks for Jinan's struggle so far.

Struggles that bring the opposite end of the outcome will not betray the process. Because the result of their love is only a paddy shell that does not contain.

Blank. That they should be separated.

...*****...