The Children Of Thalia

Visits - 3

"Lee?"

"SILENCE!!!!!!!"

The impact made my heart feel stopped beating for a moment. Lee was fierce, even our father also admitted it, but everyone knew that his fierce attitude was not because he was really full of anger, it was because he cared about us. He thinks of us as a family, and he doesn't want us to. That's why he's acting so hard.

However, there was a difference between his anger now and his fierce attitude all along. That slap, that expression, that snap, his attitude was now completely filled with anger. Rarely do I see it this way, less often than see it in an attentive manner. His anger was real, as if his gaze alone could burn anything in front.

"In the end I was like this, in the end I was so, in the end, in the end... ENOUGH ALREADY!!!! Why don't you just stop your bad habits, huh? You've always been like that, feeling that you should be able to do more, feeling that you can't do anything, you never see the good side of what you're doing, you always ignore the good effects of what has happened, you always look for the shortcomings of what you do, and always feel less. You always blame yourself, but never appreciate anything. DO YOU NEVER UNDERSTAND???????????"

Lee did not hold back his voice. He even pulled my collar strong. He growled like a lion as he spoke. He is currently really creepy.

Or, that's what I thought, until I saw tears welling up her cheeks.

"Lee........."

With a sob he wiped his tears, then continued talking to me.

"Isn't...... Val told you that too? Or do you need to explain it again?? If you don't come, those criminals will attack us sooner. If you hadn't pushed Val, maybe he wouldn't be here right now. If you hadn't dispelled that fire while we were running, maybe you weren't the only one being bandaged now. Why don't you think about that? Why don't you think about us you saved? You're younger than us, but also more reliable. Do you think we never thought about it?? If it was me who was there, I would have died in the first second, if it was Val, he would have died in the first minute. Only you can fight them and save us when injured, and even, you're not satisfied with that????"

Lee forgot all his feelings. I'm speechless. Lee's tears drip down my legs. It feels warm, but it's so sad. I made her cry. It's my own stupidity. Lee was right, but I was the one who still felt unacceptable.

"Hey, Lee. Isn't that enough?"

Val tries to calm him down, but Lee pushes away the hand that is trying to hold him.

"SILENCE!!!"

Val was instantly transfixed, pulling back his outstretched hand. Lee wiped his tears again, then continued speaking. "Val, don't you feel fed up? Theo has always been this way, thinking he is meaningless when he does more than us. Don't you feel like he's insulting us who can't do as much as he does?"

Uh, wait, no! I never was!

"Lee... What are you talking about?" Val was getting confused.

"Of course, right?? He's always saying that if this were Val, it would end up like this, if it were Lee, it would end up being so. He always carries us in his grievances, but also saves us at all times. Doesn't that mean he's indirectly insulting us? She said oh, Val should do this, oh Lee should do it, but instead I'm the one who has to do it all myself."

"OF COURSE NOT!!!!" I shouted unconsciously, but the accusation really pissed me off. "I just want to return the favor. I was really desperate to realize that I couldn't protect Lizzy after our mother died. I just wish Lizzy could take care of the right people, but you guys accept me too. I'm a troubled kid, I fight every day, my reputation is bad, I'm scared of thugs around, I'm never honest with you guys, I always sneak out, I often come home late. But, even so. You guys always wake me up for breakfast even though I'm up late. You also work for Lizzy even though I never ask. I will never demean you!!! I won't let anyone else do it, because you guys are—"

"That's right, Theo." Lee cut my words again. He tucked his hand past my arm, then held me tightly until my chest felt a little tight. I couldn't see her face, but I could feel her warm tears seeping down my neck. "That's because you're my brother, I won't let anyone demean you, including yourself."

"...... Theo's...." Val walked over. "Behold, when the man pointed his gun at me, my body froze. I'm sure Lee is the same, Lizzy is the same, Marc and the others are the same. Only you could move pushed me back then. Just like Lee, I can't let you humble yourself like that. At least let us thank you. You saved us, that's a fact. It's not about if it's someone, then it'll end up like that. No. gabe. Back then, if there wasn't you, maybe we wouldn't be here right now. Eaten it......"

Val suddenly stretched her hand to my forehead.

"Eh?"

The flick he did made my face pull backwards for a moment. I think my forehead is flushed. Shit, didn't he realize he was a black belt? The flick could have left someone else's skull cracked.

But when I saw her smiling face, it felt like my chest was getting cold.

"Stop that stupid thought, you idiot. You're doing more than you need to."

I can't say that my habit of thinking that my work is always lacking is off. I also can't say that I'm completely healed of guilt and trauma. But when I saw them, when Lee slapped me, when Val nailed my forehead, it felt like I had been pulled back into my consciousness. It felt like my vision was clearer than before, it felt like my ears could more clearly hear the sound of rain outside, it felt like my body could feel the warmth of Lee who was still holding me tightly.

"I don't know what to say."

"No need to say anything. We're the ones who have to say something." Reply Val.

"True, we should have said this earlier: Thank you, Theo." Lee continued, right next to my ear he said that, making me look away. It's embarrassing, even more embarrassing because Lee said it.

I'm glad Lee slapped me, I'm glad Val touched me. I'm glad I got the word "thank you" from them. It felt like the shackles on my neck were loosening. My mind feels clearer. Unconsciously my hand was raised, creeping around Lee's neck, then clasped back tightly.

"Yes. I know."

I slowly pushed Lee away. His hands still felt tight in my body like mine binding each other. Come on, what's the comfort here? I haven't had a shower, you know? My body is also thin and a bit hard. But I really needed more energy to finally push Lee, who also ended up pouting away with a sullen face. I'm sorry, but there's still one more thing I need to talk about.

"Thank you, both of you. Has brought me back here, in many senses of course. Even so, my chest still feels a little tight. There's still something stuck."

"Do I need to hold you back stronger?" Lee suddenly nodded.

"No, no thanks. More than that and my body will crumble."

"You're saying I'm like a gorilla?"

"Shut up." Val taps Lee's head with his knuckle. Thank ye. I had time to think of ways that Lee could quietly listen.

"I still have the feeling that I have a duty to protect you, to protect Lizzy."

I had a feeling that Lee was going to suspect. He's usually like that. He will cut while shouting WE CAN PROTECT OURSELVES!! However, this time the two of them quietly listened, which made me quite surprised as well.

"I knew you'd say that." Val replied with a I-know-everything grin.

"That's your nature, of course." Lee continued. It was rare to see him agree so. "From the beginning we knew you must have remained stubborn no matter how much we explained it to you. You will still feel that you have a duty to protect us because you have received so much from us. Well, I was going to protest, but I wanted to try to understand. It's true we can take care of ourselves, but you save us every time we're off guard, Theo. Because just do what you want to do."

Did they change in just a few days? It's so weird, they feel weird. Are they really Val and Lee? I almost didn't recognize them.

What am I really talking about? So foolish. Of course it's them. That's their other self. People who express clearly how they feel. It would be a shame if I were the one who kept hiding.

"Yes, that's right. I feel like I owe a lot. Also, maybe because all this time I feel because I'm a receiver, then I have to do more. I always felt that as long as Lizzy could live happily, my life would be enough. But then I realized that my wish might be harder than I thought. I want to protect her, I want to give her a safe place, for you too. For that, I'm the one who has to change."

"You're right, but don't forget yourself either." Reply Lee with a smile.

"So, what do you want to do?"

I took a breath. My heart is pounding, I hope I didn't say wrong, this will be my resolution, the decision I made after experiencing so many things. I want to at least say this clearly and out loud.

"I think I'm gonna take Helder's entrance exam."

I was ready for a face of shock, or innuendo, or yelling that was actually just a form of overreaction. But they only showed a faint smile as if they had guessed.

"It's long enough for you to wake up, isn't it?"

"Yes. As usual, Theo's a fool."

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