OUR RELATIONSHIPS AND TRAUMA
No one is ready for a loss
Ana hissed slowly when she woke up, she did not want to wake Kaivan who was sleeping in an uncomfortable position beside her bed while continuing to hold her hand.
Ana looked around and found no one.Since she was allowed to go home all she did was lie in bed, eat, and sleep.
Ana sighed deeply while looking up at the sky - the sky of the room.
"Sorry mommy, sister, you can't take good care of you."He nodded in an almost inaudible voice.
With slowly his hands feel the stomach that returns flat.No stomach that began to enlarge due to the presence of the baby.
In the new thing, they are fad to find baby names for their first child candidates.
Even Anya and Didin happily turn their date spot into this house to play with them.So that Ana and Kaivan can also date both outside.
Ana also caught Kaivan buying some parenting books on their date last Sunday.
All is so beautiful, that happiness just disappeared.With a weak movement, the hand that had felt the stomach moved to the head of Kaivan.
"sorry I am mas."he rubbed the husband's fine hair under his touch.
Sorry because they have to lose their prospective child due to carelessness.Sorry to make a man as strong as Kaivan must cry silently - silent in the bathroom.And there are still many apologies that Ana wants to convey.
"sorry to me."Said Ana again with a hoarse voice holding back the cry.
She felt very guilty to the husband.They did not know the gender, her face more like Ana or Kaivan.
"sad?"
The call made Ana bite her lips hard.No, she did not want to cry and made Kaivan back sad.But it feels like Ana's chest is too tight.
"it hurts a lot mas, I'm tired of it.." murmured Ana slowly.
"Indeed humans are never ready to lose and no one is ready to let go of someone in their life."Kaivan said while helping to wipe away Ana's tears that ran down the woman's cheeks.
"But let's face both, together - together.Let's support each other and lean on.No need to run, just swallow but for sure."Ana's crying voice grew louder.Kaiva brought the wife into his arms.
"One more thing please very much.Do not blame yourself.Mas also guilty here."They ended up crying together.
They share the sadness to strengthen each other.Lost each other to find each other and feel weak then to be strong together - together.
Kaivan breaks off the embrace and removes Ana's tears.Ia also rubs the corner of her eyes.
It's okay today they cry and then laugh together again.They are lost but also have each other.
It's okay today it's raining even a storm but tomorrow there will definitely be a sunny day and a rainbow.
The knock on the door returns them to the real world."Excuse me, sir, there are friends the mistress is waiting in front."That's aunt Shopie's voice.
"yes ma'am, please prepare a drink.we will be down in a moment." said Kaivan.
Ana stared at Kaivan.The guy looked very tired."I'm the one who met them.Mas just rest."
There's probably Kaivan letting his wife alone meet her friends."Let's rinse his face first.Mas will accompany you to meet them."
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Holla...
see you next episode
