Not Hate, But Love

CHAPTER 22: WORRYING

The sun began to illuminate the house of Ila.Ila who was still asleep at that time accompanied by Angga who remained on Ila's side, until Ila was awakened from her sleep.

In his mind, Ila felt both bewildered and astonished, she wondered in her heart.

"Why is he still here?"

Because he wanted to breathe the air outside, Ila got up from her bed and suddenly it all made Angga shocked.

Without them knowing, both eyes were looking at each other they both looked at each other, his eyes were full of concern for the state of Ila at that time.

"If you know, I try to forget you even though we are just friends but still this heart seems to be pointing at you, I have a heart with you since college. But is there not the slightest door of forgiveness for me in your heart?". Angga's outpouring of heart to Ila.

On the other hand Ila also said in her heart. "I don't hate you for your nature, I just hate my circumstances. I know you're a good man, but I also know your family caused my father's death . I'm confused by myself do I have to accept you again in my life?"

The daydream was gone when Mother came to Ila's room to bring her breakfast.

Angga then immediately dreamed to feed Ila, but Ila was about to leave her bed because she was getting bored and wanted to enjoy the cool air on the front porch.

"Do you need anything? let me get it." said Angga

Ila just shook her head as a sign that she didn't need anything back then.

Ila leaves her room without saying a single word and Angga follows Ila from behind for fear that something will happen to her.

...----------------...

On the porch of the house

Ila headed towards the terrace of the house, before long Angga was beside her.

"Why are you following me?" asked Ila

" Can't I worry about you."

Not wanting to be carried away because of the kindness of Angga and not wanting Angga always to be near him, Ila entered again into the house and left Angga on the terrace alone.

Angga was confused by Ila's attitude.

"He said he wanted to go to the porch, but when I wanted to be with him he went in again

Take a long breath

I can't give up until he opens his heart to me." Angga said optimistically.

...----------------...

Ila looked at the vase in the living room while thinking about her current state.

"What should I do, is my current attitude right to him? am I a bad person for hating a good person like him?" ask Ila to herself.

Angga who was originally outside, had already entered the house and saw Ila who at that time seemed to feel sad.

Why does his face look so sad." asked Angga.

Mother who saw the two of them in the living room, felt something strange and broke the atmosphere there.

" Daughter, why is the food in your room still intact, haven't you eaten yet?"

" Not ma'am, I'm not hungry."

" Mommy already said, you have to take care of your health, son, do not be late to eat" said the mother was attentive to her son.

Mother rushed to Ila's room to get her breakfast, but Angga said "Mom, let me take it" Angga said

"Mother stay first yes, Angga make sure Ila eat a lot ya."

Angga just smiled and nodded.

Angga tried to feed Ila, but Ila dodged and tried to take a spoon from Angga's hand.

"What are you doing?"

" Here I eat alone" said Ila

" I told you, I'll bribe you."

With full force, Ila finally collapsed and wanted to be bribed by Angga.

The food was gone without remaining.

After that, the two of them looked at each other in the living room.

"Why are you looking at me like that? do you miss our past" asked Angga with a wry smile.

Ila was silent for a moment with a serious face without a smile on her lips then she said.

" Why are you doing this to me?" ask Ila

" What did I do to you?" Angga felt confused because he looked at Ila's face when it was glazed like he wanted to shed tears.

" What's wrong with you? did I make a mistake?" continued Angga

" Stop doing this to me, don't make me feel guilty to you" Ila said

Angga had already begun to understand what Ila was talking about back then.

" why? am I wrong to do this to you?" ask Angga

" Yes you're wrong, you already know I don't want you in my life if you can get away from me" said Ila

They looked at each other, Ila who was unable to look at Angga's face let alone her eyes immediately turned her face and wiped her tears that almost fell to the cheeks.

" why? why did you turn your face Ila. Are your words honest with your heart?" angga asked Ila by asking a thousand questions in his heart.

Without seeing Angga's face, Ila said many things to him.

" Now I ask you, what are you doing to me? I've clearly told you that I don't want to get close to you anymore, we just know enough, enough between superiors and subordinates."

They fell silent thinking about it all and it was time for Angga to say something to Ila.

"I just want us to be like we used to be, to be friends."

In his heart Angga said "not only that, I also want to always be near you and take care of you as a form of apology from me for taking the figure of the man you love."

Ila said at length to Angga who Ila said that the reason really did not make sense. Ila has very frankly said that if he does not want Angga in his life, he became an employee in his office it is only forced because he has to support his family at this time.

Angga tried to get closer to Ila where Ila was sitting, but Ila shifted her body away from Angga.

"You listen to me, is there no sorry door in your heart for me?" ask Angga

Ila just fell silent and lowered her head while turning her face to the left right because she did not want her tears to drip in front of the man.

"You are silent" said Angga

Angga tried again to move his sitting position closer to Ila, until Ila could not change position anywhere.

"What do you do, what do you want?" asked Ila to Angga , her voice was a bit soft because she held back her tears.

Angga also tried to grab Ila's hand and both eyes met each other.

SERIATE.