Love and Secret Identity

About himself

"Whoever you may be my future priest, may you be obedient to God, leading me to His heaven, close to Him and able to draw me closer to Him, amiin."

Speech that is often thrown from the beautiful lips of a devout Muslim girl worship and happy tiasa glorify both parents.

There have been many men who have come to propose but apparently their hearts and minds have been conquered by someone, even though there is no meeting and communication but the hope of being together never faded, even greater belief that God willing the man will be his priest later.

Flashbacks

I fell in love and was amazed at first sight, he was a Brotherhood man who delivered a short tausiyah to his peers who were students who he taught to know more about the holy book of the Qur'an. That day I accidentally left a note in the mosque and when I was about to pick up the book again, this step stopped when I saw the figure of an authoritative, intelligent man, handsome and every sentence he spoke at that moment, shook this soul in admiration.

We had been a boarding school but somehow in the last seconds of the encounter, it was only a few months left that he would graduate and continue his higher education.

The figure of a handsome man, a face that calms even though this is just a steal look at him. How to dress is very neat, smart, independent, active in social activities, and most importantly is to maintain the association. For me it's so perfect.

But that admiration I can only imbue myself, too early to think of a thing that already has its destiny. From then on I chose to avoid it, unable to look at it even though my heart was eager to see it.

Several times we have been in the same activity, but there was no reprimand let alone talk to each other because I did not want to know him better, just knowing his name. And hope this feeling will change and forget that figure. Right now the main goal is just to focus on learning and learning.

I am very difficult to fall in love let alone admire someone like a woman's admiration for a man who makes him always dream of wanting to have it. But to her is different, I must try to forget her because I do not want to do something in vain, if not my soul mate then why do I expect it.

But strangely even though I tried to avoid it, the news and stories about him were always coming at me, without being asked. The story about him makes me more and more fall in love with the figure of a man who will either be my soul mate or not.

One day I was sitting on the porch of a mosque waiting for a friend, and I saw that he was a man who made me smile without any funny words coming out of his beautiful lips, making this feeling uncharacteristic as if my heart was beating unnaturally, but just looking at his shadow as if happiness was rising in this heart. O Allah, his charms are too deep in this heart.

Until five years passed there was no more news of him that I heard, but when a friend reminded me of the figure of the man they admired in the pesantren, and he's a man I'd love to hear from. They said that he proposed to a beautiful girl Sholehah, but perhaps the woman was not the soul mate written in Mahfudz for her, until the marriage between them did not take place.

Maybe it's a test for me to admire and love someone who doesn't even consider my existence. Either he didn't know about me or for him this self was not interesting in his eyes at all.

All this time I tried to forget her but I was a weak woman until her name was still spoken in every prayer. I have no power and no power to take away this love. But when he found out he had someone he loved so much for some reason this heart seemed to be slashed, This heart was very sick when I was nobody in his life.

He never knew how hurt I was when my name was removed from my prayers.

As if it was over when no one started, just admiring.

When I intend to forget that figure in my heart and mind, even in my prayers. One night, after praying as if in this heart there was whispering.

"It is that easy that you give up before you fight, remember that struggle is prayer and effort. Do you think that your prayers have been in vain, let alone rejecting you, even if you do not know each other. Don't-don't the man you've admired all this time is your soul mate. All this time he never knew about you, did you never know and you would never know if you did not ask him. Don't assume a woman who expresses her feelings to a man is embarrassing and looks low. Siti Khadijah is the only woman married by the Prophet on the basis of love like men and women in general. Have you forgotten what their love story is?"

"Oh Allah, I often want to forget him in this heart and mind, but the memory of him seems to be thousands of times stronger. If he's my match then make it easy to pick up the word halal, aamiin"

***

"Until when will you refuse someone who comes to propose to you, they are not just any man, then who how do you want to find Rukayah. Handsome, rich and Sholeh all kinds of men have come to whip you but I don't know if I'm dizzy with your behavior!" angry that his aunt was umi and his ashes always follow the wishes of their daughter.

Before answering the sweet smile was painted on that soothing beautiful face.

"When your heart thumped just from hearing her name, then that was love" the beautiful woman's inner heart wanted it

"I want him, who makes me shed happy tears when his name Abi says to me, that the man I've been waiting for has come to propose to me!" rukayah explained

"Until when do you wait for him even if you live he doesn't know it?"

The words of Madinah's aunt were sharp, although she was grumpy but wanted the best for her nephew.

"It was not because of the meeting that he became my soul mate, but because he was my soul mate that we met. I waited while fixing myself, whether it was a soul mate or death that approached first"

"I'm very difficult to fall in love with aunty, therefore I want to marry the person I love. I fear that if I force myself this will end up like the story of Mughits and Barirah. It is not that this self is suuzan of God's destiny in the future, but I cannot force my feelings!"

"Maybe some people think that living together will bring love, and women are easily touched. But not with me, I want to hear rejection from her before this self forgets about her!"

"Abi and Umi have met both of Adam's parents"

"Are you sure you want to propose to that man?"

"Abi told that to Adam's parents"

"Oh my God, what dream did I have last night to hear this!" did not accept Madinah's aunt because she had her own candidate for her nephew.

"People are better many times than Adam, think again of your intention to marry him!"

"Even the Space is very gentleman he met both of your parents, conveying his intention of wanting to preach you!"