Is There Another Love in Your Heart?

2. The sudden proposal

Usually when both, the mother often nudged about marriage. There are questions that almost certainly I can not answer, except with silence and a thin smile. I hope you'll be tired and never ask again.

Tumben, I haven't mentioned that for almost a month. I usually feel anxious around him. Aha right, maybe mom is tired. Good though. It feels so good to be free from feeling depressed. Let me enjoy my life. Stop asking.

From the beginning you were more silent, that's what made me feel comfortable around him. Never once asked. Although I am sure he will continue to pray.

When age begins to move closer to three. While the soul mate does not arrive. It is not God's destiny that makes the heart feel good. Because the soul mate, death, fortune has become God's decree. It is written in lauhul mahfudz.

I am currently working as a non-permanent teacher (GTT) at a State High School (SMAN). The salary I receive is not up to one million per month. A tad? Obviously, for the size of life in the present era where the needs have skyrocketed.

Especially when compared to the PNS teacher. Despite the burden of cooperation but our income is like the sky and the well. True said my mother, the windfall cannot be imitated. Work can be the same but fortune is God who governs. Humans are asked to maximize effort. Fetching the wind in a halal way.

GTT teacher salaries are calculated based on the number of teaching hours. If the teaching hours are many, the salary received is also many, and vice versa. The arrival of a new PNS teacher poses a threat to a GTT teacher like me. That is the real condition of educators in this country. It is still much lower than factory workers. They have earned a salary according to UMR in their respective regions.

A senior teacher returned. That was when I first applied to become a teacher. “Do not become a teacher if you expect a big salary. It is better to work in a company or just be an entrepreneur. Complaining about salary will only reduce our sincerity in work.”

And right, those words are like an injection when this heart starts to not be straight. His name is heart sometimes up and down. Sometimes it's straight. Lucky I was told that way.

I'm not an education scholar. That is what causes several times the chance of teacher CPNS tests to be missed. There used to be a teaching deed program at diploma one. So a pure scholar like me can take deed college in order to take the teacher CPNS test. But in recent years, the government has abolished the program. Actually I can still take the test in the path of non teachers in accordance with my certificate. I have no interest in working outside of education.

Even though the salary as a GTT teacher is not much, I have remained faithful to live this profession for almost five years. Not a minute. To me being a teacher is not about how much material I receive, but more of a soul calling. If I was just thinking material things, I might have left this job a long time ago. The opportunity for a career in the company is wide open. But again not. I am comfortable with my choice. Insign until the end of my life, I will dedicate my life to education.

Some of my friends chose to resign and work in factories or companies that obviously pay higher salaries. Moreover, the hope of being accepted into a PNS today is so difficult. The existence of a moratorium restriction makes NIP seekers can only resign. A very reasonable decision.

That is how PNS is the goal. Thank God I am not. For me the status as an honorary teacher is no reason to work at will. Because I believe God has his own calculations. In addition, I also do not want the salary I receive to be a subhat.

“Realisticah, Ms. Saida. When to go to gini. We need a decent life.” My friends said.

One by one they began to determine their fate.

Life is a choice. I made the choice to be a teacher. It's not good I accept. The provision of Allah has been arranged. I don't want to worry too much about that. At home, I also open a lesson. My love for education is ingrained.

A college classmate, currently the head of a branch of a private bank smiled at my stance. We used to be both active journalists. At the beginning of college, he once put his heart on me. But in the end, as time went on, we became friends. He is currently assigned to my city. On one occasion he stopped by the house. He even offered to work in his office. I refuse subtly.

At night, I used to help mom cook for her rice shop. That's all I can give you. The day went by with more or less the same routine. I don't feel my age has now climbed one by one stairs.

***

Today as usual I went to school with a million expectations. Teaching me is like entertainment. Meeting students is a joy in itself. Although educating children today is not easy. Every child has a unique. Therefore, the teacher must have a way to approach the child. The toughest task of a teacher is not how to transfer knowledge in the mind of the student. If only like that, google certainly more good. But the hardest thing is how to educate them. Well, educating itself would not be effective without example.

As the bell breaks I rush to the teacher's room. Of course with a hope can relax the mind for a moment. Talk lightly with a friend.

Times have changed. Somehow these teachers discussed fashion, culinary, grooming, hanging out, karaokean. There was a sudden sense of disappointment. I'm starting to dislike that kind of atmosphere. In the past when I just graduated college and worked in a private company, such a scene was ordinary. As if it becomes a lifestyle as well as a necessity. Slowly I want something new. I want something meaningful in life. That's why I chose the profession. I never thought I would find something more or less similar. Is it because they are young?

Suddenly I remembered the story of Bu Mus in the novel Laskar Pelangi. A humble and committed teacher to deliver his students. Simple, full of responsibility and love for the profession. Honestly, Bu Mus's figure is what makes me have the courage to change professions. Are there still teachers like Bu Mus in this era?

Young dates are time to receive a salary. Ms. Sulikah, the school treasurer had been woro-woro in the group to immediately take a salary. Teachers and employees are signing autographs. Looking at the queue a lot I chose out of the room. Soon the doorbell will be in class. I have a teaching clock in class XII. I better take a paycheck after the third break. Usually it's quiet. After that, the finger went home.

My guess is correct. The chamber of treasurer was already quiet at this afternoon. I immediately signed SPJ salary. After receiving my rights, I immediately parted and thanked him. I held this brown envelope. Thin. Even if my salary isn't how much it feels like it's a blessing.

“Im sorry Ida can't make mom happy.”

I thrust a white envelope at the mother of a portion of the salary I set aside. The amount is not how much. I hope you understand that I love him very much. Although I can't give enough money.

“Mother's happiness, seeing you married, Nduk.”

She smiled and returned the envelope again.

“Save for your needs. Mom is still there,” Sahut.

I accept it with a doubtful heart. It felt like there was a shrill sigh sneaking in the chest. This is the hope of the most successful woman in my life.

Silence greeted for a moment. I was drifting in my own mind. Mother's words seemed to be swirling in the head.

“Do you already exist..,Nduk ?”

Mother did not continue the question. I know what Yanag was going to say. Finally, dysentery too. I don't think mom is bored.

I'm shaking. “Numbered, Mom. Just pray.” Then I took a breath and exhaled slowly. Looks like there's something he's going to say.

“You remember ustadz Hakim? I scrunched my forehead.

“That's filling out the Sunday afternoon study at mushola gang lima?”

“Kan ustadnya change, Mom? Ida can't remember, which one is.”

“Iya. I don't know, Mom. I don't remember the guy. Why?”

In recent months, Mom and I have been participating in studies held in housing. Initially, Ms. Aisyah our neighbor invited us. The Ustadz changes every week. But his schedule is almost certainly fixed. Ustadz Ilyas fills in in the first week. Ustadz Judge was filling in the second week, then there was ustadz Musa and Ustadz Subhan. Among them I remember Ustadz Subhan the most. Because in providing studies accompanied by scientific reasoning. He also has a great sense of humor. Ustadz Hakim who meant the mother was actually the youngest among the four. Unfortunately, I only followed her studies once. Because they often clash with other activities.

“Ustadz Hakim was in Jombang. He was sent by someone to find his friend's sister's wife. Miss Aisyah came here. Meaning to introduce you.”

. “If yes, then ustadz Hakim will come here. Do you want?” ask mother.

“Iya. You know the guy?”

“Ya. Kan just got Bu Aisyah here.”

“Nggeh Ma. This is part of the effort. No harm.” I'm underwriting.

“Iya, Nduk. I hope that. Then this is over, I'm not going to Miss Aisyah's house. Let him contact Ustadz Hakim.” immediately

After Maghrib ustad Hakim and Bu Aisyah came to the house. They convey their purpose and purpose. First they tell me the figure that will be introduced to me. Ustadz Hakim also admitted that he was not very familiar but his work he had heard. His name is Muhammad Zulfan.

I agreed to this introduction to continue. Ustadz Hakim and Bu Aisyah looked so happy, so did Mom and Dad.

“Kulo percados you Ustadz.” My mother said politely (i believe in Ustadz).

“Let me tell you, Sir, Mom.! I did not convey with the party there first.”

The next day at the same time, ba’da maghrib Ustadz Hakim and Bu Ais returned home. He said he was in contact with the party. The plan is next week the family will visit here first.

“Ba’da maghrib, ngggeh?”

“Ngge Ustadz's. Matursuwun,” said the Father as we drove our guests to the front door.

“Is there a photo, ustadz?” Ask mother. I immediately grabbed my mother's arm.

“Wah, sorry Mom, I don't have any. My friend forgot to give me a photo. But I know the guy. Insignia did not disappoint. If the same Ma'am Saida insyallah fits.”

They all laughed. I'm the only one who's embarrassed.

“Piye nduk?” (How, Son?)Ask Father and Mother after Ustadz Hakim and Bu Aisyah have disappeared from view.

“Ngge, manut kulo.” (Yes, I am angry)

I'm happy to mix it up. On the one hand, I was afraid that he didn't like me. Because listening to the speech of the Judge, this person is not careless. While I don't know what information about me Ustadz Hakim gave me on that side. Ah how is this. So I told my parents about this.

This fast? time seems to pass so fast. This self still stutters in disbelief. There are details of happiness I feel. Is this a dream? Uh! Hopefully not.

My mother and I prepared various meals in the kitchen to welcome our special guests. Father and Mother also contacted both my sister and Tiara. But they could not come because it was so sudden. While Tiara was attending her husband's office out of town. But they put their prayers on me, and hope it's for the best.

Today I wear a small flowering navy color robe combined with my favorite light blue hijab. After sweeping the face with a bit of powder and thin lisptics, I looked back and forth at the face of myself in front of the mirror. Don't forget the brown socks I just bought at the school cooperative. To reduce my groggy taste, I opened the Quranic mushaf while waiting for our guests to come.

“Assalamu aleikum.” The sound of their company has come.

“Waalaikum greetings.” Sahut Father and Mother who are ready in the middle room immediately stand welcoming the guests. My chest is beating ungodly. My body is hot cold.

My mother and father let our guests in. Their entourage was one car plus Ustadz Hakim and Bu Aisyah of course.

Mother called me who was actually waiting in the room from earlier.

“Come, Nduk!”

Then I went out of the room and met them. I greeted them one by one, except for the male guest I just slapped my hands on my chest. I don't know which one is my candidate. Just a glance I glanced. Perhaps the man sitting next to the somewhat old man. He seems to be the youngest of our guests.

I took a seat next to Mom. I dare not lift my face. More people are looking down and listening. Answer briefly if asked.

Ustadz Hakim opened the conversation by introducing both families. To convey the meaning of their arrival to us. Even though we actually know. This is a very reasonable stale base as an opening conversation.

Ustadz Hakim was so clever in herding which way this communication should go. Not convoluted and directly conical. This meeting is very valuable. It should have made a decision. Moreover, both sides of the family have agreed. There is no reason to delay.

The decision was agreed tonight. My wedding will be in two weeks.

There was a feeling that quietly tickled in the heart. I don't know what it's like. Obviously, tonight my eyes are hard to shut because my mind is floating everywhere. Didn't think I'd end my free time soon. No more old virgins warming the ears. Yes Rabb, thank you for all these facilities.

Seriate