When the Heart is Tired

stop working

Now that our son is four months old, his weight is normal and healthy. I want to try formula milk because later if I work again I help use formula milk when I work again and I love it again when I get home from work. Early drinking is fine I give half a bottle directly drunk with my child until it runs out. But when thirsty and change drinking immediately vomit-puk. I immediately stop the milk formula again.

" how ya solution, adek can not be given formula milk,?" ask my husband when he is sitting - sitting in front of the house.

" be patient first ma, maybe adek need adaptation" replied my husband while menoel-Noel cheek our son.

" yes, if if you can't be fed milk, help me, let my mom let go of this job, for the sake of the little one" I replied while kissing my son.

" it's up to my mom how good it is" my husband said

" it is not possible every hour mom goes home to give too much mas" I said

" adek ride a yok bike" exclaimed the Revelation who came while riding his bike

My son who saw laughter continues as his hands reach out like he understood that he was riding his brother's bike again.

" have taken a bath" asked me when the Revelation had stopped right in front of me

" have a bath, have a bath "ask the Revelation

" it is already fragrant to follow the streets of Revelation bang" I said while holding my child

" not a bik road, but a bike ride" exclaimed the Revelation

He doesn't want to be told to walk because he's riding a bike again. Very critical of today's children.

" deck let's go to the house mbh edok" invite the Revelation while still nangkring on the bike

" it's gonna be the way tonight" I said

" later tonight adek want to where "ask Revelation want to know

" the way to Mbah's house edok sleeps there" I answered

" i'm coming, bik, I want to sleep at home too"

" say me first" I said

The night we went to the house of in-laws not long after my other brother-in-law came too. Coincidentally Tonight everyone was just chatting ordinary. I slept at my brother-in-law's house on the way home. Revelation so sleeps in her house mbh. We slept in the front room of the television.

In the morning my son woke up first asking ***** I also woke up. My mother-in-law is awake apparently cooking in the kitchen again.

In the afternoon I went home to the Revelation. My husband came home first thing this morning after drinking coffee because he had to go to Noreh. We walked enough because my house with the house of in-laws close still in one area of the ground.

A week later I tried to give formula to my son again. I gave her half a small bottle straight in her drink. I wait an hour my son is ordinary two hours later still ordinary and not okay - Napa. Not long after my son asked ***** so I give ASI after about ten minutes and finished***** immediately vomit again. Up out of his nose also vomit directly I'm afraid of choking. Apparently my son can't mix formula milk with ASI. Let me give up on my son's health. I dropped out to give ASI alone meant I had to stop working. Maybe my sustenance is not there yet. Maybe there will be another better sustenance to entertain me. At the end of this month I will say goodbye to pak pengulu.

I'm still holding my son, I'm worried about seeing my son vomit. I shouldn't have to try formula milk again. 'I'm sorry mama ya kiddo' my inner self while I kiss my son.

The night before I went to bed I expressed my wish to my husband.

" mas kayaknya it's definitely mama want to stop working" said I with a heavy sigh. Actually, unfortunately also because his salary is quite good can help add to the economy of our family.

" it's definitely true ma, have mama think again well" asked my husband while looking at me

" yes mas adek can not drink formula milk alternating with ASI. Mama is afraid that later the health of adek is disturbed mas, quite have just been born adek already often take medicine every day. Mama sincerely mas, maybe later his recovery comes from elsewhere" I said at length my husband heard while nodding - nodding his head

" yes if the decision of the mother like that, whatever it is papa always support what else for the good and health of our child" answered my husband while stroking my child's head

" well continue yes son we love you so much" said my husband while kissing my son's forehead

Not long after that my son woke up. It's been a habit of almost two weeks this habit of my son if his sleep during the day a lot of his sleep if the night sleeps a little and wakes up long wake up. Midnight usually just sleeps again. We take turns to look after him sometimes I can not bear to wait until he sleep again it feels sleepy automatic my husband who keeps me asleep first. If you are tired of playing already sleepy and ask ***** new I woke up with my husband.

I kept my routine every day, even though I gave up my job but I was happy to see my son grow up healthy.

as we promised last night I went to the house of pak penghulu. At ten less I was gone. Before leaving, I gave my son. Now he sleeps usually if his nap is long.

Arriving at the house of the pak penghulu I said greetings. I heard Mr. Pengulu answering greetings from the kitchen room and told me to come in. I went in and sat on the chair while waiting for the pak penghulu to the front room. Not long after, Pak Pengulu came out.

" how is bell" asked pak penghulu as we shook hands and let me sit back

" Thank God, sir, you're healthy" I asked again

" yes, this is how the healthy bell of old people sometimes linu - linu in the joints sometimes ordinary hypertension" he replied with a laugh

I also began to express the purpose of my arrival here

" this sir actually my arrival here I want a parting, my son can not if helped formula milk is not possible also I bring a child to work sir or repeat the change to the house" say it while taking a breath

" so really you want to stop working bell, actually dear bell but want how else for the sake of the child is okay. Later you try to find another replacement" said pak penghulu again

" I want to apologize sir if during my work I often make mistakes often offend the father or there are words that are not appropriate I said either I intentionally or unintentionally again I apologize as big as sir" I said while arranging the hands

" it's the same I've forgiven you" said pak penghulu

" please eat a drink that has been eaten and consumed by me yes sir" said me again

" wes yes bell all father ikhlaskan" replied pak pengghulu

" then excuse me sir once again thank you sir" I said, saying goodbye

" i'm sorry y bell not made to drink, the house people are still at school" said pak penghulu

" yes sir, papa" I said

" oh yeah now we go to the office for a while, take your salary later this month" he said again

" i have not been in for a long time sir, do I still get a salary" I asked

" let's come along just think of it as your son's sustenance" said pak pengulu

I just nodded as I walked following pak Penghulu to the village office.

Arriving at the office was rather quiet that there was only the treasurer of one staff person. I also said greetings to enter while following pak penghulu from behind. We entered the village head's room not long after the treasurer came. Yes gave up the envelope a bit thick to me he said it was my salary as the operating money. Thank God that I am grateful for the sustenance you have given me, O Allah. I say goodbye and say thank you.

I got home almost at twelve. My son is still sleeping I wash my hands and eat. Finish I eat not long then my son woke up asking ASI, then it was sleeping again so that my son slept a lot during the day.

because my son sleeps again I just carry us back to the house on foot do not forget I say thank you to Mak-in-law for being in the care of my son.

Arriving at home I slept my son back in the bed and I gave him the baby mosquito net. My husband's home again resting too.

" how have I met Pak Penghulu" asked my husband

" yes, ni mama is still paid for the end of the year as well as the same operation is still in the envelope mama has not opened" I replied while pointing at the envelope I had brought

I opened it next to my husband while counting it. Thank God everything is almost five million I am grateful to still be given sustenance. Tomorrow I will buy a necklace for me to wear to my son to remember the memories of the results of working in the village office.

We finally fell asleep with my son. The weather also supports suddenly that was hot now become cloudy. The wind blows pretty hard as breezy to cool. I approached my son to hug.

' good sleep baby' I whispered in my son's ear.'

Thank God my son grew up healthy without any influence from his illness as a baby. May one day you become a dear Sholehah child to be the pride of father and mother, my prayer of a mother.before long drizzle began to fall. This morning my husband noreh sap I thought. But the sustenance is already there that sets us grateful.

...ΩΩΩΩΩΩΩΩΩΩΩΩΩΩΩΩ...