The Angel of Gus

I'm honestly fragile

"Who wants to attend school ?" Rasya asked as she made up her little chin.

"Tante Zahra."

Rasya glanced back at Zahra who was still looking down. It's not wrong if Zahra helps him in terms of taking care of Ici, but until when ? Rasya feels very unwell with Zahra who always helps him from Ici is still a baby. As a man, he understood very well the gaze and behavior of Zahra who put his heart on him. But at any time, Rasya will remain confident in his love for his wife. Although he sincerely lived his life now, but really, his little heart is still convinced by Aisya who is still alive today.

"Ici can go inside for a minute, son ?! Abi wants to talk to auntie Zahra for a while," said Rasya while lowering Ici from her sling.

"May Ici just here bi ?"

Rasya shook his head."It's adult business, baby, you haven't had time to listen. Ici enter yes !"

Ici nodded, leaving his feet behind his ashes that wanted to talk seriously.

"Please sit down Ra !" Pinta Rasya on Zahra.

Zahra did not reply, but she nodded slightly and walked slightly to get to the seat.

"Afwan sis, Rasya's brother would you like to talk to Zahra ?"

"Until when will you approach Ici Ra ?I mean approach her more and act as a mother for her" asked Rasya with a serious look.

"Afwan kak, not the intention of Zahra to take over the position of Aisya, Zahra just pity the same Ici who almost every time crying longs for uminya. What's wrong with Zahra helping to calm Ici down ?"

"I know you love Ici Ra, but please be normal ! I don't want Ici to assume that she doesn't have a mother and that she should consider others as her mother. Ici has Aisya Ra, until anytime no one will ever be able to replace his position !"

"Aisya is dead, sister, will you be up to when Rasya's brother covers this reality from Ici, huh ? Okay fine, I will indeed never be able to be in Aisya's position, moreover snatch your heart from her. But by Allah I love the same Ici not because I want to get sympathy and attention from anyone, I love the same sincere Ici from the heart sis !" Clearly Zahra with teary eyes.

"Za-zahra, I'm sorry ! I don't mean to accuse you that it's not, I just don't want Aisya's position replaced by anyone," Rasya said feeling guilty, moreover his words made Zahra cry.

Zahra no longer said or answered Rasya's apologies. He got up from his seat and left Rasya's house with his sobs.

Rasya regretted, realizing that his words were outrageous. Moreover, Zahra was a woman, whom Rasya had indirectly offended his mother.

Rasya is aware of Zahra's feelings for her, although he cannot and will never be able to reciprocate those feelings, but he should not hurt her with his words.

"Astagfirullah, forgive me for hurting you Ra," muttered Rasya regretfully as he rubbed his face rough.

***

Day after day has changed into the moon, Ici was just being side by side by her grandparents from Jakarta, but today she has to separate back with them.

Mother Elsa and Father Rama often come to the boarding school to see her grandson. Even the souvenirs they bring to Ici are not responsible.

"Hu hu hu Ici wants to join oma, Ici wants to come !" Ici cried while tugging at the clothes of Elsa's mother, who was none other than Aisya's parents.

"Well, can't you take a few days off ? Mommy can't bear to see Ici who constantly whining," Elsa's mother told Rasya.

Rasya noticed his son who continued to cry from earlier asking to follow his omanya to Jakarta. Feeling unbearable, Rasya sighed then nodded.

Mother Elsa smiled after seeing Rasya nod, she squatted parallel to the height of the cute boy who was still crying.

"Dear kiss, yes Ici can join oma. Try Ici say same abi !" Said Elsa's mother while rubbing her grandson's cheek.

Rasya understood the girl's gaze, he nodded as he said, "Yes. Ici can join oma same opa to jakarta, but abi must also follow ! How ?"

"Yey, abi's coming too. Ici dear same abi !" The boy ran to hug his ashes and kissed his father's right and left cheeks after he was in his arms.

Rasya prepares his needs as well as the needs of the child and put them in a small suitcase.

His memory drifted as he helped Aisya prepare for her needs when she wanted to go to Jakarta.

Where when Rasya always bothers the wife by continuing to invite her to talk until their preparation is not finished.

Coloring her by floating a few kisses on Aisya's face, hugging her from behind then proceeding with mutual love.

Rasya smiled bitterly considering that it was a time of happiness that ultimately had to be taken by the fate.

The innocent clear liquid came out from his eyes, Rasya closed his eyes by hugging a picture of his wife.

His longing was peaking, the tightness in his chest was getting more pronounced. But what should he do ? Even begging and prostrating Aisya would never return to her arms.

'2,280 days have passed, baby, never a day or even a second did you miss you, no longer love you, and no longer wish you would come back. Until this moment and this moment it was all Aisya, I miss you so much, love you so much, and really, really hope that you are still alive. To be honest, my dear fragile, I am not strong enough to live life like this, I just pretend to be strong for the sake of our children, for the sake of our parents. Hiks hiks, mas miss Aisya, sangatttttttt miss !'

"Secure.....!"

Hurriedly Rasya wiped his tears, then turned a glance at the source of the voice.

Ici approached his ashes, he wiped the tears that were still left in the corner of Rasya's eyes.

Rasya increasingly could not bear to hide his tears even longer when he was meeting with his beautiful daughter.

Ici nodded, then he kissed his forehead long enough. Rasya shed his tears again, trying to turn his face so that his son does not see that his ashes are currently fragile.

But Aishi is a smart boy, he begins to understand little by little the stories of his parents. Ici stared fixedly at Rasya, his gaze as if to tell that he was fine even without a mother beside him. Yes, although often Ici also felt longing and could not bear to immediately meet with his uminya, but his ashes would certainly miss him more.

"Ici no papa no umi who accompanied Ici from childhood to the age of Ici 6 years abi. But Ici more sad if abi cry, Ici no problem should be far away and wait until much longer, but Ici do not want to be far from abi now. Umi has her own happiness, right bi ?"

Happiness itself ? What does that mean....

Oh God, I'm sure I will meet Aisha one day.

My duty awaits you, and the duty of destiny brings you back to me !

😭😭

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