Should We Divorce?

37

"We're divorced."

On top of the gurney she had been in for the past few hours, Serena sat with the flat, unreadable look she had once displayed. Down there, his finger twirled the ring that Ares had thrown towards his chest. Each turn on its axis means that one time Ares's voice is rotated again in the ear. No, it's not frustrating. He just wanted to convince himself that the decision to give up on Ares on the emergency ladder was right.

He surrendered. And Ares let go.

Impasse.

Nothing to regret or regret.

No matter how much he regrets or cries, the end point always stops at the word farewell.

His daydream was split apart when a glass of water was thrust in front of his face. He raised his gaze, and caught his mother Ares standing by his side. As a form of courtesy, he took it even though he did not want to.

"Thank you, Ma."

Yolita only smiled slightly, then lowered her gaze as if she had no more face in front of her daughter-in-law.

Serena who noticed that, knew very well how her mother-in-law was feeling right now. It must be hard to accept the harsh reality given by your own child. Although it is clear that his son did, but parents will always feel they bear his sins.

Then he turned his gaze toward his two parents and the faithful father-in-law stood at the side of his safe. It had been an hour since the bad events had passed, but the darkness still overshadowed their faces. It seemed that they were all hit harder than Serena herself.

Unable to see the helplessness of everyone he loved, he first grasped the hand of Yolita who looked the hardest hit. Squeezing it strongly seemed to convince all this was not his fault, and he did not have to grieve too late.

But, Yolita shook her head. Raising his head hesitated and looked so desperate. "No, Serena. Please don't tell me that you don't have to be sad about this. My mom felt guilty and failed. All this was caused by Ares's son Mama. He's the one who made you this way."

"Mama, that's why you don't have to feel guilty. All this is done by Ares, not Mama. Mama's got nothing wrong in this. You don't deserve to feel guilty let alone fail."

"But Ares is Mama's son. My mother raised him to this size. If she does something this bad, then there is something wrong with your upbringing. Mama failed to make him a wise man and a responsible man. That's why Mama deserves to be blamed." Yolita could not resist the vibrations of her lips as an expression of guilt, anger, disappointment, and despair.

"Mama."

"It should be when you know in your household something is wrong Mama asked you to leave Ares, instead of holding on. Maybe if when you come to your house you are not selfish by asking for it, you will never get to this point. You'll never feel the pain of losing a child."

"That's not true, Ma. Without my mother asking for it, I wanted to survive. If Mama thinks it's Mama's fault, then I'm guilty of it too. I'm the biggest mistake maker."

Yolita shook her head as if she would not allow Serena to think that way. He objected. "No, Honey. Don't tell me that. You are not guilty in the least. Don't you ever think like that again."

"So stop thinking Mama is the most guilty. Its not fair. My mom was not wrong at all. Eliminate all those thoughts. That way, I won't think like that anymore either. Please, Ma. For my sake."

Yolita rested her hands on Serena's hand, which had her covered. Squeeze it hard. "Either what Ares thought until he could let go of a woman as good as you. What else is he looking for to waste someone as sincere as you. Mama really doesn't think, Serena. After this Mama will talk again with the child to think again about his decision. He can't divorce us

"Please don't, Ma. Let it be if Ares really wants to separate. I also feel that our relationship can no longer be maintained. We are not compatible."

"But, Serena----

"Mom, there are many secrets in our marriage that not everyone including all of you knows. I'm not as perfect as Mama thought. All this time I also often hurt Ares without anyone knowing. At the beginning of our marriage until now running five years, I never treated Ares properly. We're married, but only Ares carries out the household duties. We are husband and wife, but only Ares thinks of me as wife."

"Serena...."

Having the question mark lodged in Yolita's eyes, Serena nodded. "I'm not lying, Ma. I'm that bad as Ares. If I'm hurting now because of Ares, then Ares has been hurting because of me. That's why I gave up on our relationship. If we continue to be together, we will only continue to hurt each other. Let Ares decide all this. Maybe it's her way of finding the happiness she hasn't gotten from me. Maybe with her and another woman she could get more treatment than me."

"But why do you believe that woman is better than you? As long as you know Ares' affair you know the woman too?"

Serena was silent with her eyes returning implying a wound. That is exactly what he regrets. Why had he not known that the other woman in his household was so close to him? That the woman who destroys his household is the woman he made friends in his work environment? That the Carnation that had been circling in her brain was Michelle's own model Carnation?

But, despite all the above ignorance, Serena knows one thing that Carnations loves Ares. All of that was so obvious from how Anye filled the blue box she left for Ares with all of Ares's needs. His concern, his affection, Serena clearly lost to Anye. Maybe that's what makes Ares turn away. Anye can give what she cannot give.

"I don't know him, Ma. All this time I only knew her name was Carnation. Besides, there's nothing else I know. It was only after I saw the incident that." his voice trembled slightly. "I know what his face looks like."

In her silence, Yolita's brain began to think unsettledly. Carnations? The woman who was with Ares was a Carnation? Was it the same carnation as he thought?

"After that, I realized that I was stupid, Ma. How can I not know if the Carnation that has been present between me and Ares is a model in my own agency? That woman was so close around me and even I made friends."

Serena recalled the time Anye came to her house to take Altan home. At that moment Ares was so tense and Anye's attitude turned cold. He should have been suspicious at the time, not naive. He should have suspected Ares too when he suddenly asked about Anye when he picked her up.

If only. If only he thought more carefully or at least a little sensitive, maybe his way of knowing how the figure of Carnation would not be like this. Not to see her naked with her own husband.

"Serena."

That call from Yolita drew back Serena's consciousness. Serena stared at her in-laws. Little wonder as Yolita's eyes turned anxious for what reason.

"Serena, what... The carnation you mean is... Carnation Michelle?"

Serena's face tightened in shock. "Mom knows him?" His whisper.

• • • • •

The sound of crisp tires filled the silence of the night in Ares' two-story house. The car that had been running at full speed stopped right in his yard. Soon after, Ares got down from there and slammed the door hard.

With his jaws hardened, he thrust violently at the entrance. Intending to go straight to his room, his footsteps were restrained in the living room to find someone who honestly did not want him to see present there.

Carnations.

Anye approached Ares with a restless face. "Res, is everything okay?"

Ares sighed and released his arm from Anye's stray. "I don't want to talk to anyone anymore. You better go home now."

"Why? What was? Did something happen?"

"Anye, please. I told you I don't want to talk. I'm gonna take a break."

When Ares was about to miss, Anye again blocked him. "But hit-and-but

"What did you say I said?!" Ares brushed aside Anye's cheque and shouted at her. "I said I don't want to talk to anyone! Same with you!"

Anye's eyes immediately glazed over. Before today, he had never seen Ares this angry at him let alone scream. And again, what did Ares say? Don't want to talk to him?

"Why are you, Res? Why are you angry like this?"

"Yes because your question is ridiculous! You ask me if everything is okay or not. This morning, you saw what it was all about. Nothing will be okay after all that! There's nothing!"

"I'm just nanya, Res. I just want to know Serena's situation. Why did you say you didn't want to talk to me? What's my fault?"

"Don't pretend you don't know where you are, Carnation! You must have realized you were the reason why Serena ran away from me! He was shocked and angry to see us both naked! Understand?!"

Anye's tears fell without being held back. Did Ares just put him down guilty of all this? Did Ares indirectly declare himself the cause of all this?

"So it's my fault? Is this all my fault?"

"What do you think?! Do you think all this could happen if you don't exist?! Is all this possible if you don't come to my office?!"

"But my return here doesn't mean anything bad to anyone, especially Serena. I pure just wanted to meet you. I also have no intention of making him angry by wriggling us sleep---wridden

Seeing Ares's forehead tightening in anger, Anye realized she had misspoken. He was almost completely discredited about his crime that night. Fortunately, he could still hold it. Soon he changed the topic before Ares became suspicious.

"Let's just say you're grateful I'm back, Res. Just last night you asked me not to leave your life again. Why is it now a gini? Why are you accusing me? Do you think I want to be like this? I can ruin people's homes?"

Ares swallowed his saliva with a breath that was still hunting. For a moment, guilt tucked away at Anye's tears. Even so, he still had no intention of apologizing. Although Anye wasn't completely wrong about this, somehow Ares felt so angry at her. Perhaps because the cursed night that brought him and Anye together was the cause of all this destruction.

"Res, you really think I'm the cause of all this? You really think I'm wrong about this? You really think about me---

A sharp cold sound made Ares and Anye compactly turn their heads. Unexpectedly unsurprisingly, near the open door, Yolita-her mother-Ares-stands with a dark aura that seems ready to earth scorch the world and its contents. Henrialdi Risjad also stood beside him with an intimidating posture.

Anye stared as the sound of knocking steps to two people who were so close to her was getting closer. Undoubtedly, he was a little frightened and intimidated.

"Tante---

"Enough."

Anye's lips clenched again as Yolita opened the palm before her. He hinted at him to completely stop making a sound.

"Whatever you want to say, please keep it until it's time for me to ask you to talk. Right now, let me talk first."

Again, after Ares, Anye felt again the unusual treatment of those closest to her. It feels inexplicable. That must be pretty sore.

"Since I've known you from childhood, I never thought that someday you would be the cause of the destruction of my son Antares' household. The girl I love is like my own daughter, I look after her like a diamond, it can destroy the lives of other women very badly..."

"...as long as you disappear, I always hope you come back to us and we can coexist like we used to. But if I knew God would grant my wish in this way, I would never ask Him for anything. Your presence here seems to only bring disaster to the life of my son and daughter-in-law..."

"...you, Carnations," Yolita pointed firmly. "You have taken Serena's rights as a wife and as a mother. You have usurped our rights as grandparents for our future grandchildren. Because of you we all have to lose the baby we are waiting for patiently. Because of you our hopes were all shattered in an instant."

Anye Kontan's body stiffened. Don't understand what Yolita means about Serena and the baby. Serena why? What baby?

"For you a fetus in the womb of Serena must fall before birth. He cannot see the world because of you. You hear that?! You caused my grandson to die."

Suddenly, Anye limp from head to toe. The serena? A miscarriage? So she's pregnant? So when Serena saw herself and Ares she was pregnant?

"And one more," then Yolita looked at the single prince no less sharply. "You're also involved in this, Antares. You and him are the same. Mama thought you guys were just good friends all along. But it turns out that the word friendship has changed ties to be more serious. When you're friends you're always compact. No wonder when your relationship is more than that your cohesiveness is getting tighter. You guys are so compact to destroy Serena's life..."

"...especially you, Antares," now it is Ares' turn that Yolita points to. "Mom never thought you could do this. Mama does not recognize you as the figure of the child that Mama raised and used to be proud of. I don't know which demon has possessed your soul until you're this evil..."

"...you're so outrageous for hurting a woman like Serena. And as if that wasn't enough, you just made him more devastated with the words goodbye. If anyone is to blame again - other than this woman - for the loss of Mama's granddaughter, it's you, Antares. You killed your own son. You've failed to take care of your own child..."

"...at this time you may be able to be together and be happy on the suffering of Serena. But trust me, none of this will last long. God is not so evil as to let evil prevail over truth for too long. Let's keep it all right..."

In turn, Yolita skinned Ares and Anye. "...sober up. Even if it's gonna be too late."

• • • • •

As she opened the door of Serena's ward, Reno found angry gazes from both of Serena's parents, especially Seno Raharja. Despite just looking into her eyes, Reno could still feel her hot slap on her face five years ago - two weeks before she decided to cancel her marriage to Serena. Seno Raharja was the most wrathful person and hated him at that time. And nothing seems to have changed until this moment.

"What interest are you in here?" The growl coming from Seno Raharja's mouth made Reno swallow her saliva.

"Om, I-i----

"Stop there," he jolted as Reno wanted to advance. "Nobody will let you in!"

From the direction of Serena's gurney, Seno Raharja walked gallantly full of heat. Despite his old age, he never lost his wife to be respected and feared by people.

"Please get you here. How dare you show your face in front of me?!"

"Om, I just want to see Seren----

"For what? There are already his parents here. He doesn't need anyone else. I can still look after him like I took care of him when you left five years ago. Understood?!"

"Sebent---

"Go now! I won't look at your face again!"

"But, Om."

"I said go, yeah per----

"Lad..."

The tension on Seno Raharja's forehead loosened as the voice of Serena greeted him from behind. He turned his body and looked at his daughter in wonder.

"Let Reno come in, Pa."

"What are you saying, Serena?"

"Attent. Reno seemed to want to talk about something important. Please." Please."

With clenched hands not received, Seno Raharja turned his body. Staring at Reno once again as if to say don't dare to hurt his son again. He came out by hitting Reno's shoulder, then followed by the wife-Ira.

In a room filled only by the two of them, Reno stood awkwardly beside Serena who was sitting down. For some reason, seeing Serena like this she always felt part of the cause. His guilt continued to grow considering he could not prevent the arrival of Carnations.

"What's wrong?" Serena doesn't know what to do. It's been a long time since he's seen Reno. Forgetting when was the last time. He was also quite surprised to find his arrival.

"Sere. I'm sorry for what happened to you now. I'm sorry for your son, too."

Serena wondered why Reno would know. But more than that, he is suspicious of Reno's uneasiness. "That's all?"

Reno realized Serena suspected him and seemed to be waiting for her sentence to continue. He could not lie to Serena-or Serena who was too smart. Therefore, it seems that he must be honest.

"Serena.." she gulped her saliva with a million regrets. "Pardon me... I'm sorry I couldn't prevent this from happening."

Serena doesn't understand. But he chose to keep his confusion in silence.

"Actually I knew this early. Long before today, I knew Ares and the woman's relationship. I chose to investigate this alone."

"Wait... Ye? Tau?"

Reno nodded reluctantly. "Before I knew what your husband looks like, I had met Ares and Carnation accidentally. At first I didn't suspect anything about them until I finally saw a photo of Ares in your house, then saw Carnations in your office when I returned the jacket..."

"...from there, I began to feel that something was wrong between them. How can those who I initially considered lovers, one of whom is your husband and the other one who works at your place..."

"...because I was so curious, I was desperate to kidnap Altan and--

"What?! Kidnap Altan?!"

"I had to, Sere. I have no other choice. It was just that way that came to pass. Then everything is proven when Carnations come to your house nganterin Altan. From there I know that Carnations do not know if the wife of a close friend is you, and you do not know if your husband's close friend is your own model. You're not aware of each other, including Ares..."

"...but, Sere, my plan succeeded in making Carnations self-conscious and out of Ares' life. That's why he quit your agency all of a sudden and left this town for months..."

"...I know, the departure of Carnations brings a fresh breeze right to your household? Your chances of coming back are the same Ares so wide open. Ares also began to melt again as before..."

"...at the time, I thought everything was safe. I can bring back your long lost happiness. Because it is too lulled, I do not realize that Carnations can only come back in your lives again. I'm kecolongan. I failed to prevent her coming into your life and Ares again..."

"...kalo now all this happens, I also contribute to be one of the causes. I failed to make you happy again, Sere..."

"...sorry.sorry. Sorry for letting you down again."

Instead of answering Reno's statement, Serena was actually stunned because the thread of the problem returned chaotic in her brain. Quoted from the confessions Reno just now, means only himself who is not aware of this problem.

Reno, who was an outsider, immediately understood that something was wrong. Anyelir and Ares have known since the kidnapping of Altan. Let's say Carnations are free to go without explanation or tell her about all this. But Ares? Ares was with him all this time. All this time they lived together. But why didn't he tell you the truth about all this? Why did he choose to keep the figure of Carnation hidden from him?

Really, this is all too confusing. Too unexpected. Serena doesn't understand how she knows the least about her own problems?!

Oh God.